Does it seem desperate if a girl hits a guy up?

  • Yes
    Vote A
  • No
    Vote B
  • Other (comment below)
    Vote C
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Not at all. I think many guys would be happy if more women made the first move. There are plenty of things that can seem desperate, but that sure is not.

    Now, I think that for a guy, learning to accept that men will normally have to make the first move is part of being successful, but it's always relieving when a woman goes against the norm and moves first.

    Are you considering hitting a guy up? If he seems interested, by all means, go for it.

    "She's cool and pretty and funny, but it was a huge turn-off how she hit me up instead of waiting for me to hit her up," said no guy ever.

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  • It's surprising.
    This shows some social disjunction.
    Every body is okay to say ni (and many men would answer they'd like it, if asked),
    BUT
    Anygirls are doing it. Just waiting.
    It seems girls don't agree with their own answer... Why? I don't know... :-s

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Most Helpful Girls

  • Hell no, girl if you want something you have to get it. Just don't chase a guy, like tell him your interest and if he isn't interested let it be and don't run after him

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  • I don’t think is a sign of desperation.
    Only confident women do it.
    I’m always making komg the first move. So I’m kinda tired of not getting the same amount of attention back.
    I’ve been trying to contact my friends and also hang out with them but none of them been initiating conversation lately and every chance they have (availability) they never try to see me so. I’m just going to move on from that and find new homeboys and/or crushes 🤷🏾‍♀️

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 58

  • No, it means she is confident and takes the initiative instead of waiting for a guy to notice her or realize that she is interested. I actually think more highly of her.

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  • Hmm girls approaching guys or hitting guys up is fine--when the girl is hitting within her league. I'm all for cute girls wanting to take action and not wait.

    But don't be that weird loser guy who goes and approaches the gorgeous hot girl. Make sure you're hitting in your league or close to your league.

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  • It depends like sometimes for me, when a girl tries to hit on me

    She usually has a child, big on their weight size, or boyfriend issues and they are very secretive about it.

    They try to aggressively introduce themselves to me. Which I believe that they are desperate

    While normal size, decent looking girls are just casual and natural with it. They say it at a good time after knowing me too just for a little bit or try to. Which I believe this is okay.

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  • No? Its quite the opposite, thats a healthy human behaviour.

    A woman who is happy with herself and not afraid of doing what she wants without being dragged down by what others may say or think. Its very attractive.

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  • Of course not , remember a lot of men fear a vicious rejection , or these days a harassment / rape accusation.

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  • You don't hit people!!! Didn't your parents ever tell you that hitting is wrong? I'm just kidding. lol No, it's not desperate.

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  • Who doesn't like feeling wanted? Believe me, guys can be way more insecure then they want to admit. I was terrified of rejection in high school and probably missed out on a few great relationships because of it.

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  • If you talk to him first it would be just the same when a guy makes the first move, just with reversed rolls.

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  • No. Most any guy would be more attracted to a woman who knows what she wants and isn't afraid to take the initiative.

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  • If a girl hits me up Id think that they have some sort of interest which makes me hope I can talk to them more if I'm interested

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  • If I'm not attracted to her yes. If I am attracted to her then I'm happy as he'll.

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  • No. I actually think more girls should do it more often if they feel confident and likes the guy (as long as they're not desperate)

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  • Not at all, example for me its really hard since i always think im in the way or being annoying and so on,

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  • so the majority vote for both guys and girls is no by a long shot, so why dont girls approach guys more cmon

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  • Not at all. It's actually very cute and even atractive.

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  • To be honest some guys wait for girls to do the first move

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  • If anything it turns me on for her to be that up front

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  • i wish that would happen more, that shit is stressful for me

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  • Absolutely not - I would even argue for the contrary

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  • No and a million no, it will make the guy much more relaxed knowing that the girl likes him

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What Girls Said 16

  • In my opinion, not at all. If guys can do it, why can't girls?
    Granted, all my relationships have been online ones so far, but I'm always the one to be straightforward and say, "hey, I like you." I'm even similar with just making friends. I'm straight up and I'll approach people.
    Maybe it puts off some people, or comes off a bit strongly, but I'd rather be upfront than beat around the bush, if you know what I mean. It's just how I am.

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  • No it doesn't. It's okay to make the move and call or text first. I did it with my boyfriend he was actually really happy because girls don't see him as attractive so he didn't really bother trying, until I made the first move.

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  • No i never thought it made a difference as long as you don't mind an occasional rejection. I asked my boyfriend out and we're going on three years. Though he has told me since that he could tell I was desperate.

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  • The person who voted 'yes' is the person who never gets 'hit up'... Hahaha

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    • You are a Egomanic.
      Maybe you got lucky when a guy hit you up.
      If you got hit up many times, that doesn't mean you are better.
      You only need one man to give you everything you need.
      Or you really aren't better than other girls.
      Cuz the best girl who is happy doesn't keep needing more and more to be satisfied.
      Some girls only meet one man and he gives her everything she ever wanted or needed. And sometimes without her ever asking.

    • @GracefulCharm Buddy, you have nooooo idea what you're talking about... But good to know you're stupid enough to say it anyway... =)

    • *By 'hit up' I presumed you mean ask them out... Not ask them for sex (which is something some people seem to think it means).

  • No, making the first move or hitting up a guy that you are flirting with doesn't make you desperate.

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  • Nope, it means she is srong and independent i think

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  • A lot of guys r just as or more nervous than girls

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  • It's 2018 Women can make moves now.

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    • But they dont

    • Some do. I do. We can't cry for Equality and not make some moves ourselves. Equality means Rejection, Advancement, Punishment, Power...

  • It's normal. We're all people.

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  • No..

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  • Nope

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  • Lol no.

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  • no it's not

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  • No, I did it.

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  • Not at all

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  • I had the same question haha

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