Are overweight women really marginalized in dating?

Based on your personal experience and observation, do you think that overweight women "BBW" are really marginalized in the dating world? If so to what extent?

detailed and thoughtful answers are appreciated

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think it depends on her physical fitness, her work ethic, her strength and stamina, her intelligence, her happiness, her confidence and her personality. I know very over weight woman who have an easy time getting guys cause they are extremely good in their careers and don't mind difficult physical tasks like climbing or walking or working a 10 hour shift and I know very over weight woman who can't find anybody willing to date them because they are neither intelligent or virtuous or chaste or hard working or strong or happy or fashionable or confident or funny or nice.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I have dated women who are A FEW pounds overweight and had no problem with that. However, I am not attracted to women who are 30+ pounds overweight, To me, there is nothing cute or attractive about a pudgy face. I suspect that many guys feel the same way. We all have our flaws and deficits to overcome but I suspect that the women who call themselves "BBW" have great difficulty with dating. Of course, this is a problem which they could address in a constructive and healthy way. . . if that was their choice.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Yes I do. An OkCupid study found that attractive women receive 25 times as many messages as curvy women and minorities.

    As much as I don't like overweight women... I do sort of feel for them here.

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    • Did u just call minorities and curvy women unattractive? Wow.

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    • DATA? Lmaooo boy I doubt that any study that matters would have categories called “attractive women”, “minorities” and “curvy women”. Either you’re really fucking stupid or bad at English.

    • @bente2 The categories obviously weren't labelled as such... read my previous replies by the way. I'm a doctoral student :)

  • Sure they are. So are guys. Normal people really aren't into fat, unless there's some kind of fetish. Fat people are simply not very attractive. And it's just not healthy.
    This whole 'body positive' thing is simply fat people trying to make other fat people more comfortable. In reality they need to eat less, or better, and move more, and become less fat.
    Not hot woman is into 'dad-bod'. Trust me. LOL

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  • I do think so. Mainly the majority of men do not find BBW attractive and the ones that do may not openly show this since we live in a society that does not really support it. There are off course differences between races since we all have different builds and therefore have different preferences and different views. For Caucasians I don't think it's very accepted as a general liking.

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  • Well there are men who in particular fancies large women (funny though never vice versa)
    Of course they do not get the same attention regular sized girls do but there are those who look for that and it seems that the overall opinion is getting more favourable

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  • I think so. Most of the guys I know say stuff like "ugh, fat" and would never consider being in a relationship with an overweight woman. Some might want to know what it's like to fuck a big woman if she has a beautiful face, because they want to try "the whole rainbow" once.
    I only knew one guy who loved overweight women and openly went for them and didn't care about the constant jokes he had to hear from his friends.

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  • THICC is in! As long as you aren't some kind of landwhale then men, especially Mexicans and blacks, will fucking love you chubby ladies.

    I am personally a chubby chaser myself but I have Asperger's so that's kind of irrelevant since I'm screwed anyway LOL!

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  • Not at all, in the street majority of attractive guy always seems to go for the fat / chubby girls.
    They aren't even curvy but fat, only stuff is that they're very stylish which is one of the most important things in my country.

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    • Did you say in another post that skinny girls are preferred there that's why so many people diet like crazy?

    • @anmari2001 Yes, I did but it's what I see in the street.
      Guys say they prefer skinny girls but in the street most are with chubby girls (very stylish though) and girls do diet a lot.

      Skinny girls are preferred yes but when chosing between a skinny girls who aren't fashion and a chubby girls who's fashion most chose chubby fashion girls though they always say to like skinny women -_-
      That's quite weird like situation.

    • Yeah this is a paradoxal

  • Extremely. Even when they find guys who like fat chicks they half the time they don't get taken seriously by even them because it's either a fetish or they can't admit that it's not what they really want.

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  • They've always been unattractive to me because it reflects how you live a lifestyle. If your unhealthy then your life is probably unhealthy. Some situations with obesity can't be helped due to medical reasons and that's understandable. It's just the first thought that pops in my head when browsing through the dating apps. Not being pig headed but I can't seem to get this idea out of my head no matter how hard I try. Sorry

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  • They are less preferable because fewer people are attracted to people of an unhealthy weight than a healthy weight. I guess you could call this marginalisation.

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  • Absolutely and completely marginalized. Just see the comments on GAG. It's not guys' fault that they find fat women unattractive,; they just do.

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  • well there are things that make you more attractive and things that make you less attractive. there are things that make you ugly and unattractive that can't even be changed. if you're fat, lose weight and you're good. if you're ugly, what are you gonna do?

    so my unpopular opinion on this is: yes they are marginalized and rightfully so.

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  • Yes they are and they have it harder than bald/short/overweight men because they can't make up for it with status.

    I for one wouldn't date an overweight woman, chubby is ok, overweight is nah.

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  • I don't consider overweight women in a romantic way. I no interest in romantic actions with them. They don't trigger my libido in any way. Nothing personal, some people don't consider bald, older or poor men "in play". It's just what your preference is.

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  • They are and this is a great way to focus on their weight
    There are no such thing as a fat girl with self-esteem

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  • I don't know if overweight people are marginalized in dating, but they should be.

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    • Why should they be?

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    • @Kkaos I'm not insinuating that, I very much am against overweight people receiving positive attention.

  • For sure. Looks, appearance, visuals... they trump everything when it comes to the dating world.

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  • First of all, let's all agree that being overweighted is mostly due to a big lack of selfcare, so I would say yeah it's logic if they are marginalised, no matter if you are a women or a man if you're overweighted it's your own fault and we should encourage them to get a healthier life rather than encourage them to accept the way they look, you can encourage a short man to accept his length cos it's not smtg he can change, you can help a women to accept her curves if she feels less attractive becos it's not smtg she can change (without hurting herself) but you can't tell someone to accept his fat belly if he/she can do smtg bout it.

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  • Not sure. I mean, you can't help what you're attracted to. A little men and women are attracted to me, and I'm overweight.

    In some cases, it seems like being extremely fat, like to the point where you can TELL they are physically unfit or out of shape, at times people seek acceptance for it. I saw a post about these women saying that men are obligated to fuck a fat woman, etc. It's ridiculous.

    But as far as things go, a lot of men are attracted to thicker girls. I'm overweight, but I'm also healthy and physically fit. So it's not as if it's affecting my health at all.

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  • Well its kinda their own fault bcs not many people ate attracted to overweight people

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  • Not really.

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  • Yes!

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  • I don't know I guess

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  • Yes.

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  • Overweight women are marginalized in dating

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  • Yes. At least in online dating.

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  • We've become more of a looks based society. Years ago you had to go and meet people and then decide from there if you were attracted to them if you didn't know them beforehand, but now, with online dating, you may be the greatest woman or man, because I think they're in the same boat, but based on a picture alone, a lot of people knock you out of the running.

    I think there are still a lot of guys who still treat overweight women like they should be grateful for someone even noticing them and feel like they should take all kinds of abuse or just be easy because the pickings can be slim or they may have low self-esteem.

    This marginalization happens in a lot of areas for both men and women. If you aren't "the norm," or the "right" race, or the "right" height or able bodied, or educated, or have money, etc---the deck gets stacked against you.

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  • Yeah, they are.

    I have a friend that’s kind of fat, and if we go out i’ll get attention by several guys and she gets attention from none. It’s very annoying because I feel like I have to hold back because else she’ll get insecure.

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    • Tell her to get in the gym, being fat is a choice

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    • @joshb Yeah Josh! Shut your whore mouth!

    • Why dont you go back to your house on whore island 😂

  • Not as much as they once were. There are still some men who use it as an excuse to be an asshole to a woman. But there are plenty of men interested in women for more than just how well she fits some ideal or another. There are a lot of men who prefer bigger women.

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    • And there's also plenty of men who aren't assholes who are simply not interested in overweight women.

    • @Kkaos That is true too.

  • I think many marginalize themselves by believing they are above their own standards, so choose to stay single when the people who are more their level are rejected by them.

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