How should I tell my bf?

I recently found out I have separation anxiety. I only see my boyfriend on weekends because we live and hour apart. We talk everyday but not seeing him during the week is really hard. My doctor suggested that I tell him so we can try to work on this. The only problem is I don’t know how I should tell him. Any suggestions?
Updates:
I told my boyfriend about the anxiety. So he went to build a bear and made me a bear with a message inside so if I ever miss him I can still had his voice and he also did @Melodie_Flowers idea and got a locket he’s going to get a picture of us together put in it. Thanks for all of the great opinions🙂

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Just be honest, and ask to talk with him in person somewhere private (like your room, or the living room when no ones home) and let him know what you've been dealing with.
    Tell him you want to share this with him bec he's an important person in your life, and be honest. Explain to him how it feels being apart, and remind him you do need your space, but you are also struggling with this anxiety that makes things hard.

    He's your boyfriend, you can trust and share whatever you want with him! Especially if it involves him. So have a relaxing evening in, unwind and get a good chat going, cuddle up and ask him to talk about something important. Then explain

    I'm sure he will be VERY glad you told him this, and it'l help him understand what you're dealing with too, and hopefully he can find ways to help.

    Also, maybe keeping a picture of him in a locket necklace will help you? Or have him send you a good morning message each day through voicemail, that you can replay through the day when you need to hear his voice. Take one of his t-shirts to wear when you miss him, and ask for his bracelet to wear as a comfort piece from him.
    You can even ask him to spray some of his cologne onto your pillow and blankets when he's over to help you sleep! My boyfriend does this. I also stash his hoodies in my bed and wear them at night. He knows, but he doesn't mind :)
    I hope you both can work together and get through this!

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    • The locket is a good idea I’ll bring that up when I tell him. Thank you

Most Helpful Guy

  • Sure. You sit face to face and tell it just like you did here.
    The problem is that is the problem with LDR's - and I only condone them if it's temporary. Will there come a time when you two will see each other every day? As in move closer? Or together?

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    • We have talked about moving in together. He thinks I should finish college first. (He already finished) I should be done by next may

    • Focus on your goals, on making your life and relationship worthwhile. My guess is the anxiety will pass.

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What Girls & Guys Said

41
  • Just sit him down, in person and in a public place (maybe?), and tell him, "Hey, babe. I really need to talk to you about something." "I recently went to the doctors, and it turns out that I have separartion anxiety. I hope that we can find some sort of way to work this out."

    Also, was it a psychologist you talked to or a regular doctor because regular doctors don't speciallize in mental health, so it could actually be codependency instead and they misdiagnosed you?

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    • Yeah it was my psychiatrist that diagnosed me with it.

    • Okay, cool :) Maybe one of the ways to work it out would be to set up a plan for seeing each other during the week, such as a date night once a week on Wednesday or Thursday

  • Maybe ask to have his hoodie or a T-shirt of his that smell like him or like a bracelet

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  • Yeah i agree with Browneye and if yo're in school he sounds like he has your best interest in mind with telling you to finish college. You should just tell him though that you have that type of anxiety and I'm not sure what your schedules are like but maybe ask if there's more times until you finish school that he could come see you or you could go see him. Maybe if it is affecting your behavior or if he thinks you are acting different around him tell him that you have the anxiety and its just causing some of that and it's not anything about how you feel about being with him. Also, maybe if you keep in mind that you are going to finish school soon and start making plans on what you're doing after college and if you really are wanting to move in together, plan that out so you can have that in the back of your head that you're going to be seeing him a lot more soon and maybe that will give you some piece of mind or help with the anxiety

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  • How would you like to be told?

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  • Is this diagnosed?

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