I have always been told that men should approach women, but at the same time I am told that women should approach. I am so confused. I was told that if I approach a man that I would automatically be rejected because it's a turn off. I'm sorry to say that it must be true. I have been rejected (ignored) by every guy that I have ever reached out to in rude ways. At least 18, my problem is whenever I stand back and just let things work themselves out, nothing happens and whenever I approach I am ignored. I recently reached out to a guy I work with on IG and told him how handsome I think he is. He said okay thanks, then later on after I ask about his interests he disappears, he's read my message but has not replied. Do you know what the problem is and how I can solve this? This is me, by the way. I'm not so bad.
Oh man. I just wanted to be honest and tell him how cute I thought he was since we have talked a few times before. I've always been direct, maybe that's my problem.
Well I can't speak for all guys, but I personally don't enjoy that, it feels like i'm just being told what they think I want to hear to get me interested. (then again, I would say lots of guys do like being complimented, just maybe not as straightforward, ie; more flirty later on, or something - IDK)
Some say men should approach, some say women can approach, both people are right.
Being approached is not a turn off, its flattering. Being approached is only a turn off if you're not attracted or interested in the person who's approaching you.
That's true! And I think that is why I feel so bad. I usually go for guys who like the same "geeky" things that i like and are different than the alpha male type, but they are just not attracted to me. So I guess I shouldn't approach haha. Anyway, thanks for your opinion.
You thinking that they're not attracted to you is just an excuse to not approach someone and risk rejection again. Do not give up. There's a difference between thinking you might get rejected and knowing you will get rejected. The difference is that knowing you will get rejected is just an assumption you make about someone to deter yourself from trying again because let's face it, trying sucks, its hard and nobody likes it, but that's just an excuse to not approach someone and risk rejection again. Do not give up.
You're very beautiful, please don't stop trying to approach people and make yourself happy with someone.😊 who knows, maybe someone else will approach you if you show that you're interested.
Maybe its the way you approach him and you just say things like "you are handsome" that scares them off, its like some dude going on your dms and say "you are pretty" remember that first impression is everything, its not the looks and im sure of that lol, maybe next time you could try a simple hello followed with an introduction and he would introduce himself and you can carry a convo from there
Oh I see. Well not only do I think he is handsome, I was also complimenting on his pictures in general and asking if he was interested in photography. We actually work together, so I thought it would be nice to pay him a compliment since we have already been in contact before. I would like it if someone slid into my dms and said that.
I don't believe you can't pull a guy, has the world gone mad! I don't think being approached by a girl is a turn off, maybe your approaching the wrong guys and try doing it irl instead of ig
But I have had no success rate. Any advice on how to move on from this because , especially lately , my confidence has taken a nosedive. And I hear all the time that you need to have confidence to attract anyone.
f someone disappears then leave that person and move on, and dont just compliment guys straight away, first talk to them, get to know them, then do it, and then ask them out
I think that is the answer I have gotten the most on this question. I have made a huge mistake! Now there's nothing I can do about it. Thank you, by the way.
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