Why would a guy suddenly be interested again?

I'm 25 I met this 31 year old guy on an app. Our first date went really well and we got on, we started seeing each other for a month and went on further dates. After the first date I noticed he wasn't messaging me that often (I have a very busy job and so does he) but he would ask the same question everyday and his replies were very short in comparison to mine. Eventually it was so scanty ( my job means I'm not always free on weekends) that I felt that it wasn't doing either of us any favours, so I messaged him politely saying that I don't think it was going to work and that I didn't want to keep seeing him. He agreed that it wasn't working but oddly soon after that text sent a playful message about pizza ( in joke)-I didn't reply.

A month later he messages me out of the blue, and he messages me a lot and messages are long and he's genuinely making an effort. Recently he told me he got a new place; when we were seeing each other he told me he wanted to buy property because was living in this communal house at the time and now he's signed for this flat. We haven't met up, im not sure if that's something he wants or something I would even entertain to be honest?

I don't know the reason for this 180 in his behaviour so I'm hesitant to react. I don't want to saturate the situation with details and I might be leaving bits out because I don't know the relevance but I'm just taken aback by the change in behaviour well texting.


Most Helpful Guy

  • The most realistic and honest answer would be that he was bored and lonely and just wanted to kill time or he had someone else waiting in the line or was trying to hook up with someone else... if he was interested in as a guy i can say he would have put the effort in the beginning itself... normally people put their best when they are trying to know the other person and are not used to them yet

    • I agree with you but in the beginning he was interested and made a lot of effort to see me throughtout but after the second date how much he texted me was scanty. I brought it up with him that ' I'd be happy with a really casual thing if he was upfront about it' and he replied saying that he was surprised because he thought we clicked but he's bad with his phone. So I tried to not pay attention to the lack of texts. But when we've started seeing each other and I have a full on job and so does he that we might see each other twice one week and none the next you kind of need to find away to keep in touch. That's why I broke it off if you can't find the time to text each other do you even have time for a relationship.

    • True... everyone has time for texting.. if he doesn't then that means there is no effort... one should make the other feel that he is there for you

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What Girls & Guys Said

  • Relationship building, takes time. There are many, outside interests in life, not allowing that personal and emotional input at the time ! Just go with the flow in life chill and relax

  • If he have a flat
    Would you move to his place
    If of course everything go well between you?

    • No, I have my own flat and it's nice, when we were seeing each other we would always spend time at mine. While I'm so pleased he's now got a place, it's again such a 'out of the blue' thing

    • I think there are no better alternatives then you
      I mean think about it
      He don't have time
      So you don't have time
      Other girls will always be demanding his time
      So what option is he left with
      Go after a girl who is herself super busy
      And he wants you back into his life

  • I can say I always try and go back to people I felt comfortable with. Even for a friend ship

  • Probably just started feeling lonely


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