Ladies, what is your opinion of a guy values fitness and eating healthy? Does it intimidate you or make you insecure?

I'm a former college athlete and after my playing days, I fell in love with working out. I also decided that in order to maximize all of the time I spend working out I wanted to eat healthy or "clean" too. I switched from working out at a traditional gym to working out at a boxing/MMA gym and I've found it's not only a great workout but it's really fun. These are all activities and practices that I like to do for myself, and I don't expect any girl I'm dating to do the same. My question though, as a female, when looking for a guy or when dating a guy would a man who values fitness and a healthy diet intimidate you or make you insecure? I've had some female friends tell me that the fact that I value looking good makes some girls who are insecure question their worth, or question whether I'd really like them. Is any of this true?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Not really intimidated or insecure, it's just something I'm not personally interested in, and because it's such a huge part of life, I wouldn't want to date a person like that. A person who dedicates their life to fitness should date someone who also does that.

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    • I wouldn't say my life is dedicated to fitness. I never once told my ex "sorry babe, I don't wanna get dinner tonight I need to go to the gym." And I think what you said is the misconception women have about guys like me-- fitness is ONE of my hobbies, not my passion.

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    • I see what you're saying, and perhaps because I'm talking about a single aspect of my life it seems like it consumes more of my time than it actually does. I just like to be well-rounded, I don't like to feel like there is anything a woman might be interested in that I can't do-- if you want to run a 5k I can do that, if you like to cook I know how to do that, I have a degree from a globally accredited university so I can have an intellectual conversation, I'd go on but I only sound more arrogant than I'm sure I already do lmao. I don't know I guess what I was trying to get from this post is I feel like I've spent a lot of time improving myself only to be told now that it's "intimidating" or makes women feel "insecure". And that's frustrating. It feels like "you weren't good enough before, but now you're too good" So I just wanted to see if that's actually the mentality of some women or if I've just received some bad insight

    • I don't think most women find it to be a negative thing, especially if it's just a hobby among others.

Most Helpful Guy

  • Simple solution-don't go for insecure girls, go for the higher quality ones who are confident they are good enough for you. You've earnt it through your hard work.

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    • Thanks man, you're probably right!

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What Girls & Guys Said

266
  • This has never been a problem for me, and I have never had an athletic girlfriend. They usually do what they want anyway.

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  • I don’t care. As long as he isn’t up my ass if I occasionally want a burger.

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  • As for me, I don't really get intimidated or insecure. It sometimes makes me feel encourage to have work-outs.

    Although I honestly feel awkward whenever there's a guy around me who have a huge body. And when I say huge I mean having so many big muscles on the arms, chest and such.

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    • I'm not like HUGE, like body builder big. In my eyes, that's unattractive, and more likely the product of steroids haha. Im 5'10 and like 180-185 lbs, I do have a big upper body, but I'm very proportional

    • Then I guess, it's just ok? 😂 As long as it looks good and natural...

  • For me i think it's really good and important that a guy take scare of himself and is keeping himself healthy and fit. It does not make me insecure in anyway at all, cos i dont do really do anything to improve my fitness but i do eat healthy. If anything it actually motivates me to do better, but not it the way that i MUST do it, just in the way like i wouldn't mind joining my partner at the gym or eating healthy foods

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  • Be prepared for sabotage. They'll plan stuff or pressure you into "spending more time them" when you have gym time planned. They'll insist on eating at places that wreck your goals. Even if you only spend three hours a week at the gym and try to watch what you eat, you'll be "obsessed" and "taking time away from her".

    Not all of them, but the possessive, jealous, insecure women will do this shit every time.

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  • If someone is physically fit and eats healthy I'll be more attracted to him. That's actually one of the reasons I was attracted to my current boyfriend because of that. I myself try to stay fit and healthy, so it's nice if my boyfriend does that as well.

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  • I think its great. You seem to have a lot of knowledge about eating healthy which is a huge plus because i can learn from you :) you're not harming anyone with it. And the fitness part is good as well, its only healty to experice every now and than. i would mind if you would put fintness above me in some cases tho. I won't think it would be intimidating, but maybe its because i see benefits of a healthy lifestyle and im also relatively healthy :)

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    • Wow its late i made a lot of typos xD im sorry ! Hope you can still get the message ♡

  • It wouldn't make me insecure, I would be completely fine with it as long as he doesn't make me go to the gym or eat healthy.

    Then he should just look for a girl that's already a gymrat. 😋

    But if he lets me live then I would be totally fine with it.

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  • No wouldn't be intimadating it would be attractive and your friends are right if it makes a girl feel insecure then question mark, its really difficult to date someone who is insecure overall in general and it seems like more and more people are becoming so.

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  • I'll tell u something, dude...
    I've turned girls down cause every time we hang out, its drive through meals...
    U gotta think of yourself first... even if they think you're like... conceited, narcissistic, etc. Need I get my thesaurus out?

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  • no. in fact, if a guy looks after his health and fitness this makes him attractive to me and i'm looking exactly for a guy that shares that with me. looking after your body and health is a must for me

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  • As a "bigger" girl, I would only be uncomfortable or insecure if that was his only hobby and/or wanted to pressure me to do it. I would love gentle encouragement though. I dig muscular guys as long as they are not weirdly huge and bulky

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  • I think it’s attractive when a person takes care of themselves. It just shows that you want to be healthy and are making an effort to be healthy.

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  • This is a good question girls should like a guy because of their personality not because say you have money and a girl likes you because of your money well tbh she doesn't want you she wants your money also known as a gold digger. Your welcome

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    • Money was never brought up though? Haha

  • As long as he can balance between fitness and me, I'd say go for it.

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  • I think it's sexy if your into fitness bc its mind/muscle & a healthy therapy... but if you're someone that's reason for being fit is purely cosmetic then that could be a deal breaker.

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  • In my case it wouldn't make me feel insecure at all... if anything it would motivate me to keep up my own routine...😊

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  • Probably make fat girls insecure and fit girls confident

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  • Nah personally for me that's how I want to be so it serves as triple motivation, support and inspiration.

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  • No. Why would someone taking care of their health intimidate me? I love when people do that. It's how it should be.

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  • nope. im good why would i be intimidated? i will join him instead i love working out

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  • MMA (or for me jiu jitsu) is the funnest sport I've ever done. What gym do you train at?

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    • My current gym focuses on boxing/kickboxing. I'd like the eventually incorporate some grappling or wrestling to be a more well-rounded fighter. Plus, obviously there aren't any rules in an altercation you find yourself in that occurs outside of the ring haha. So you like jiu-jitsu? I was looking into that

    • Yeah I've done a few striking classes and its a totally different game. I might have even enjoyed it more cause it kinda scary when you're a noob. I wanna learn it more at some point, but yeah bjj for now. If i get in a real world fight (which hasn't happened since middle school) ill just take a few hits in taking them to the ground and getting them to tap.

  • Be healthy

    Don't want to fall in love with someone who's gonna die fast

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  • Nothing wrong with taking care youself i guess it can be intimidating but it can also be motivating

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  • No. That’s silly.

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  • it would motivate me

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  • Yes...

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  • Personally, yes. I would be too intimidated to date somebody like you. Your best match is probably going to be a woman with the same fitness and health values

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    • I appreciate your honesty! Now, in theory, is there anything a guy like me could do to make himself more approachable to a girl like yourself?

    • Just patience and slow trust earning. Full honesty, I have depression, so I will always be waiting for the shoe to drop, or the joke to be revealed.

  • I dated two guys like you. Both of them just inspired me to workout myself and to eat better.
    I've never felt intimidated or sth. I supported them and feel proud of them.
    For me it's better than dating a guy who is obese and eating junk food etc.

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  • i like to lift weights so i think it's a great thing if a guy values fitness and eating healthy as it's an awesome topic because when it comes to fitness, sometimes i can't stfu LMAO, we can share knowledge, techniques, tips, and get stronger together. it doesn't intimidate but sometimes i feel like if the person whether or not it's a boyfriend or friend (s) who isn't as into fitness and has a huge passion for working out as me, then it's like i want to talk to them about working out but at the same time i feel i shouldn't because they might feel bad about their weight if they're overweight, think i'm trying to brag being able to do certain things, they might think i'm trying to force them into joining the gym and etc..

    but aside from having values for fitness and eating healthy, i think it is also important for the person to dominate humbly and have their ego in check at the gym as well. like one of my co-worker, he said he's been lifting for 5 years, seemed like a cool dude and everything. but when we started talking about going to gym and lifting, he didn't understand anything i've said so i went to gym with him one time. it turns out he's doing a lot of things wrong, his ego is sky high once he was at the gym, he wouldn't lower the weight and do things properly, horrible form, no techniques, not hitting the negative, and just using momentum all the way. when i started correcting his posture for multiple back exercises, i also told him that he's hunching forward a lot, he's completely defeating the purpose of the exercise, being counter productive, and that he has forgotten what the all basics and 101's were for exercising. he started getting angry at me and thought that i was trying to make him look bad in front of everyone at his gym because his gym rat friends were there and they were teasing him saying he's getting schooled, whipped, and etc. ever since that day then he completely ignored me at work unless absolutely necessary, hasn't spoken to me at all, and even when things needed to be passed to me he would just tell someone else at work to pass it to me instead.

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  • I aim it away from my eyes and hair. I've learned that much lol

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  • I’d like it if he was positive about it and not too obsessive. I almost married a guy where we had this in common and parts were great, but he also became way too controlling of my diet & exercise to the point I had to eat in secret. So there is a happy middle ground.

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    • I'd never tell a girl what she should or shouldn't eat. I don't date a girl with the hopes of turning her into my new gym buddy. That's why I was a bit frustrated when it was suggested to me that women might assume they'd have to adopt to my lifestyle for us to work.

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