How to shut someone down without hurting them?

All the time on social media random girls will hit me up and quickly get all flirty. Most of the time I don't like the girl, but I hate hurting people. How do I subtly hint to a girl that I'm not interested without coming on too hard? Also I'm single so I can't mention that I have a girlfriend or anything like that.


Most Helpful Guys

  • Being discreet isn't always an option. In my opinion, it isn't a good choice anyway since the message could be misunderstood or misinterepeted. Everyone is different, so everyone needs to be told off differently. Maybe they do have a great personality, but they aren't right for you. Maybe it could just not work out at all. Tell them straight, not to improve to have a shot or anything, but that you aren't interested in a relationship right now.

    • Thanks. I've only really some that to one girl before because she WOULD NOT SCREW OFF

    • I know how it can be. I've been sort of "stalked" before by a girl and I didn't know how to handle it, so it didn't really go anywhere. That's one good thing my absent-mindedness and indecisiveness have done for me.

  • Give them a one word response, tell them you're busy and can't talk. I highly doubt they'll keep wasting their time if you literally show no signs of being interested in them.


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What Girls & Guys Said

  • Oh come on dude. Girls like about having boyfriend's constantly. Don't be so square. Play the game. Flirt some, talk some, date some, drop some, play some, fuk some.
    You're not the expert on dating standards. Lose that moral compass and have some fun.. yeah, even give the ugly ones a fighting chance.

    • I know a lot of guys such as yourself view it that way, and that's fine, it's your choice how you go about things, but I'm too much of a sentimental guy to do that. When I get involved with a girl, I get attached, and if I'm just hopping from girl to girl, I'm always gonna be heartbroken. Therefore, I only go for the ones I really like and who I think I can have a long lasting relationship with.

    • Show All
    • lostsaint: some don't, some do. There are lots that want to stay with a guy for longer, and hopping from one to another is definitely NOT considered 'fun' to them

    • @asyouwereeky agreed

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