Question about when girls tell guys they just want them to listen?

So I've fallen into a classic guy mistake. When my girlfriend would tell me her problems instead of just telling her that they suck, I would try to come up with solutions to her problems. I would also try to compete with my own converse problems because it made me feel bad that she had problems that I couldn't do anything about. Do you think that when a girl is telling you her problems that she thinks she has it worse off than you, or do you think that she hears your problems and takes them in the same way, and I just don't pick up on the sympathy since she isn't coming up with her own converse problems?
(I hope this doesn't come across as me being a jerk too much)

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Most Helpful Guy

  • All she wants is for you to listen. She doesn't care about comparing your problems with hers. It's not Pokemon card game problems edition. If you start talking about your own problems then it just sounds like you're trying to diminish hers. She's not coming you you looking to be diminished. She just wants a hug.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • She doesn't want you to solve them, she only wants you to listen and support her during her struggle. And girls take your problems in the same way. You don't have to be sympathetic, but empathy is good. Take this from a guy who already tried solve a girls problems and it didn't work out

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  • She doesn't want a solution to her problem, she wants you to listen and give her emotional support. Men's logic doesn't work here, you need to be sympathetic without coming across as weak and getting sucked into being used as an emotional tampon. Give her a hug, listen to her, and saw awww that's tough, well I hope things get better for you. Then try move the conversation away from it.

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  • She need to feel safe and you supporting her. Hugs work usually

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