He said he loves me but he can’t disrespect his parents?

So I have been talking to this guy for over a year now. He lives in New York I live in Chicago. He has paid for my ticket twice to go see him in New York. We have never been intimate with each other though we just kissed. He kept chasing after me so I decided to give him a chance. We are both 23. This past year has been crazy. We aren’t of the same ethnicity I’m Romanian he’s albanian and his parents would never approve of him being with someone outside of the Albanian race. He said that he loves me but it’s complicated and he can’t disrespect his parents like that. I care for him I mean how can I not we have been talking for over a year. We wanted to spend the summer together that was the plan and we don’t know what the future holds I told him that I told him to think about what he wants now and that’s all that matters. Am I stupid for wanting to just spend time with him? Even if it doesn’t lead anywhere? If something is meant to be no one can stop it. And if it isn’t meant to be it won’t be. I’m a firm believer in that.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Let's say his parents allow him so where do you think that this relationship is going? Like what about the distance?
    When someone really loves you so no one can stop him like for example I left my family for my girlfriend because I really love her and of course had fights with them but eventually they had to accept the fact that I really love her and want to be with her.
    So use logic and think with your brain and not with your heart.

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    • He hasn’t even told his parents. He’s scared to tell them.

    • Talking for over a year and still didn't tell his parents?
      I'm sorry to tell you this but it ain't working

    • He’s a mamas boy. He really loves his mom and his mom is strict. She wants an Albanian daughter in law and that’s that. No one in his family is married outside the Albanian culture.

Most Helpful Girl

  • just be aware there will be a time where you will get fed up with that situation and progress the relationship with him. He will have to make a choice and he might very likely choose his family. Talk to him about this. Ask about what future you two could possibly have.

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What Girls & Guys Said

02
  • In my country (belgium) there are a lot of albanian people who are with other ethnicity people. If he realy loves you and u are his world' he would not care! Thats my opinion anyway.

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  • Love, is very mysterious. See you can't obviously expect him to disrespect his parents with whom he is living for the past 23 years. Since you said that he has paid for your ticket so that you can go and see him makes me feel that he really loves you.
    So girl, here patience is the key.
    Go with the flow. And incase in the future if he is ready for a commitment then he will try hard to convince his parents to be with you.
    But since he is not doing it now simply means he doesn't want to do something big and then get nothing out of it. I hope you understand what I mean.
    Go with the flow. Lower your expectations and trust me you will be the happiest and luckiest girl in the world.

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