Girlfriend anxiety and dependency on me becoming a lot, not sure what to do?

We will call her Sasha. Sasha has dated 2 guys previous to me who emotionally and physically damaged her. To the point she has bad anxiety, some mental health problems, and trust issues. My most recent ex of 8 months also had some anxiety but not nearly as bad as Sasha. For example, she can't play cards against humanity with a group of friends because she gets really bad anxiety reading the cards when it's her turn. However, when I go out to a friends house for a party and we play any card game where you have to talk, she gets mad I don't want her to come (not because I don't like doing fun things with her, but because I know it triggers her anxiety). We also tried playing dungeon and dragons with friends before and she got such bad anxiety trying to come up with a character name etc that she went to the bathroom and balled:/

This is becoming a lot to handle, because it's to the point I can't do certain things that I want to do because I know she'll get so upset. She wants to hangout with me 24/7 and I have 2 jobs and like my fair share of downtime but she's so clingy and when I tell her I just want to go home (I live with my mom) and relax she gets angry and upset:/ Or if I go do something with friends and not spend time with her, she gets upset. One part is I'm very extrovert and she's very introvert. She doesn't really have any friends, just her family but she rather be with me then them as much as possible. It's just getting exhausting, I feel like I have 3 jobs and keeping her happy is becoming a chore more than anything.

I understand why she's the way she is, and it's just really tough. Because I do love her, but I do not feel like I'm in love with her (though she is VERY much in love with me) and I REALLY hate hurting peoples feelings, especially if I care about them. I know I should put my happiness first, but I'm just too nice and I hate it.

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  • Ending things may hurt her now but she will be happier in the long run. As will you. Having bad anxiety myself and knowing what a burden it can be to my surroundings, i get how you must be feeling. But again it's better to tell her now than both get more depressed, unhappy and pretending to be something you're not.

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  • tell her to see a therapist

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