My best friend says he's falling for me, but I love my boyfriend. What should I do?


Last fall, I started college and I met this wonderful nerd and we have been dating for 5 months.
About this same time, I started getting close to this guy I knew form high-school but never really got close to. He was single and he didn't feel he was ready for a relationship, but he desperately wanted that female companionship. We'd hang out about once a month for a couple hours and text on the weekends when I was home from college for two days. My friend "James" when we first started getting close was convinced I was in love with him because "guys and girls can't just be friends" and I proved him wrong. I felt absolutely nothing beyond a deep friend-type love for him and he said he felt nothing for me.

I get a text from James telling me we needed to talk. He told me he wanted to stop being such a close friend because he had begun to develop feelings for me and this was the best way to protect my relationship with my boyfriend and him. My boyfriend had been jealous of James for a long time and I assured him James didn't like me, but I asked James to stop being so sappy. We always tried to include my boyfriend or tell him exactly what we would be doing. I just never wanted an issue with my boyfriend because he thought I was hiding something with my good-looking male best friend so I promised to always be very open about everything that occurred between James and I.

James also send a long list of things he didn't like about my boyfriend in the text about why we shouldn't be close friends anymore, which is a whole other can of worms we won't go into but I let my boyfriend see the list when I showed him the text (stupid me, didn't even think about it) and we discussed the issues. Some of them weren't valid complaints, but two of them have been topics my boyfriend and I have had discussions about. I feel like this made things more confusing because now my boyfriend has been hurt by James' confession, too.
Updates:
After James said this, I felt I had to tell my boyfriend about this so I called him and let him know what happened and he kinda laughed at first and said he already knew James was in love with me and that's why he was concerned when we hung out, then realized how upset I was and began to help me work it out. James and I haven't spoke since then as he is giving me space to think. I know it's selfish, but I want to keep them both. I love them dearly and they mean the world to me. What should I do?

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  • You end your friendship with James. You want to be friends with him, but he can't and doesn't want to be friends with you. Friendship is a two way street, not one way, therefore the friendship no longer exists anymore. I know this is a tough pill to swallow, but this is why guy and girls cannot be simple friends and highly recommend you avoid such friendships in the future.

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  • If you want to keep your boyfriend happy you get a new guy best friend that deep down doesn't want to kiss and have sex with you. I know I would not want my wife (even if I know she wouldn't do anything) just to be around a person that deeps down wants to be in my place. His intentions for anything would be fake in my view and it would cause issues.

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