I had a conversation with him last week where i said that I wanted to take things slow in the physical aspect, and he agreed and said it should be special. But then he keeps trying whenever we hang out. The last time we were together, I was tipsy and gave in a bit, and we exchanged oral.
I don't know what do you all think?
Most Helpful Guys
I think he sounds like a manipulator, thought that as soon as you shared him saying, "It should be special." Why? Yeah, if you have a deep mental and emotional bond it can become special the first time but as he does not put the effort into the relationship to share who he is, it's not that. He uses the term special to add a label to something in order to make you mentally and emotionally dwell on those words, because who doesn't want to be special? It's a topic you feel something on and the more you dwell on the words, the more you think about it and try to convince yourself you are overthinking it and dump your walls. The fact that he keeps trying proves that he is staking out your perimeter, looking for the weak spot to attack. Sorry, but you are dealing with a narcissist. Approach with caution.5
Maybe shy. I used to be and sometimes still am shy around new women. I have to hang with them a little before I get comfortable enough to talk about myself and or other things... Probably good to hold off on sex yes, because if you give yourself too soon then, he'll think that's what your like with all men your attracted or hanging with. He would always question your loyalty and faithfulness for a very long time. It might even consume his mind and have him think of you as just a slut he'll fuck with till he finds something better...1
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Most Helpful Girls
I've had a situation similar to yours. We met on tinder, dated for 2 months. Gone official and agreed we both wanted a long term committed relationship. I decided to wait a while before taking things further, and only after 1,5 months let him take my t-shirt off. He proceeded to ask if he could take the rest off too, but I said no. He turned out to be a manipulative piece of shit who’s been cheating on me since day one. Despite saying he had deleted his account he had matched with one of my friends and flirted with her. Suddenly all last minute cancellations and strange ‘bruises’ on his neck all made sense. I was just a side chic the whole time. Be careful. If you withhold sex for long enough you can get to know the person better and see if you can trust them enough to go the whole way. Is just safer that way. Also if they are purely looking for sex you will eventually find out if you’re not letting them have it - like I did when I realised he’s cheating. Better be safe than sorry1
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From personal experience if all a guy wants is sex it doesn't matter how long you wait. That's all he'll ever want regardless.
It depends if you want to risk it, I have waited 6 months to sleep with someone and he left me days later.
Yet I've slept with someone after like 2 weeks and we're in a committed relationship.
He's there for me no matter what and always puts me first, we met online. After some very bad experiences I knew which red flags to look out for, he'd never had a girlfriend and seemed very nervous. Didn't try to kiss me or make me feel uncomfortable and we spoke for 6 hours straight on the first date. Trust your gut, it rarely lies.
Also see how much effort he puts in on dates, in regards of travelling to you and how he speaks about other people and treats them.1