What’s your biggest deal breaker?

Just wondering what the most common ones are.

Scenario: You meet the perfect person that ticks all the boxes (or so you thought) but there’s one major dealbreaker what would that be for you?

I have a quite a few dealbreakers of my own actually, like if he does drugs or has deprived or extreme fetishes, poor hygiene...

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Most Helpful Guys

  • I have a question, why have you been a member of this site since 2011, but only recently got back to it. I checked your profile and you only recently came back, after a LONG absence. Did something happen?

    And are you still dating?

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    • Yeah, I think I made an account when I was way younger and asked a anonymous question back then and kind of forgot about it.

      I’m currently dating someone.

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    • I didn’t wait... I just didn’t think much of it at the time; I had asked a question and got my answer simple as really.

      And then one day I asked a question on google which matched a hit on GAG and I remembered I had a account and kinda went from there tbh.

    • Again, I just think it's silly

  • If she tells me “why do men spread there legs while sitting down it’s not like I open my arms to let space on my boobs” that was a really big red flag for me and my first girlfriend said that on our first date and I decided to ignore it because I was an idiot and that was a mistake in my part and that’s a deal breaker for me at least and I get some guys do go over board to the point where them spreading their legs is getting rid of sitting space like on a bench where there could be three people sitting but because he’s spreading his legs it’s only two but that’s rare but I live in a small town so you might see a lot of that in big cities or towns

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Most Helpful Girls

  • Someone who/who is a..
    Ladies man; master manipulator; controlling; never apologises (even if they're in the wrong); lies constantly; selfish in bed/struggles to perform (yet miraculously can at like 3.45am😒); has a track record for cheating (I can't say much for a one off cheat, I'll be first to admit I done that 3 years ago - I'm not proud of it😣); appears as if they can be in a very loving relationship where all is well, only then to dump their partner and then go off with someone else within a matter of days/weeks; and lastly, by no means least.. Someone who is violent. It could start from a shove, then a slap and, in some cases, it can result in the person being left for dead.

    Oops. That seems to be all about my ex.. 🙄😂 Avoid men like him, like the plague!

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  • I guess its a guy who can't take criticism or admit when he is wrong. There are other things that I consider to be worse than this but they aren't relevant in my life.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 75

  • Oh, so many... Here we go:
    1) Married to someone else
    2) Divorced
    3) Feminist
    4) Liberal
    5) Drugs
    6) STDs
    7) Smokes
    8) Cheats or ever cheated
    9) Criminal record
    10) Parties
    11) Has kids
    12) Weighs more than me
    13) Tattoos
    14) Mental health issues
    15) Uses cell phone on dates or during together time
    I could go on...

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    • Ladies if I was you I would not come on this person's page. He's being very racist and he was being really racist on my pose.

    • @crystal how he been racist?

    • @cystal No, you asked a public question, and you got an answer public answer. Not every answer is going to be one you like, and being able to handle that like a mature adult IS PART OF BEING A MATURE ADULT. You could have left it at that, but you didn't. You went on a racist tirade, said you couldn't be racist because of your race and followed me here to harass me... so now here we are. Sure, I said I'd be leery of dating a black woman in light of modern racial tensions, and you proved my point by screaming racist, the exact shit I to which I was referring. You are EXACTLY the issue which makes men like me run. I don't want every division of chores to be a debate on racial oppression, nor to walk on egg shells every time I pick out fruit at the supermarket, and getting called the R-word can get men fired, beaten and even killed. However, you throw it around at the drop of a dime. What man in his right mind would want to bother with that?

  • For me its if she does drugs, gets drunk too often, hates her feet being touched for a massage, thinks sending pictures of her topless (just wearing the bra) to guys because they ask her to and says its not cheating.

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  • If they are hypocritical. More specifically of they judge an aspect of who I am as if it makes them better than me while simultaneously doing essentially the same thing. For example, I smoke weed. Do I do it often? No. Am I addicted? No. Does it negatively impact my life in any way? No. But if I met someone and they looked down on it while they sit across from me drinking their beer or wine then I know it would be doomed before it started.

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  • Takes pills for Depressions/mental stability

    Lazy/no direction

    Less than 3 close friends

    Sexually incompatible

    Bad relationship with her parents

    Social media zombie

    Can't critically think for herself

    These are a few, but I would probably have short term fling with a girl like this

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    • People like you make the one that suffers from mental illness feel like they are crazy while a broken mind is as unwanted and unpreductable as a broken arm or a cold. 👏🏼

      High five to the ones who can be honest to themselves and seek for help when needed while a lot of people can’t even admit mental healt is a thing and keep living their miserable life.

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    • @JesseTheMan she needs a couple close friends because it's dangerous if I'm the only support Network. Think about it, if someone has no friends at all is that not a red flag?

      Her relationship with her parents is everything, if they didn't raise her right there's going to be issues that will become yours quite quickly. It's also good to have the emotional support there from the parent's.

    • Some paretns just suck. You shouldn't expect everyone to have a good relationship with their parents. Not all parents are good parents or even good people

  • - Into gang shit
    - Kids (because they’re usually only interested in your money)
    - Addict
    - Too flirty / hooks up a lot
    - Too obsessed with social media
    - Goes out all of the time

    Basically anything that makes me truly question the potential / intention of the relationship. Anything that can easily destroy it outside of her personality and mine.

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  • well... i have never been in a situation like that before , but if i found the perfect mate that have one issue that would break everything between me and that person... it would possibly be , the fact that the person can't remove his head of his phone while we are together

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  • "Im a virgin, and i want to wait till marriage"
    me- "See ya"

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  • Against the constitution and amendments. Don't care if the woman is the prettiest in the world if she's agaisnt those then she can turn around and walk out that door.

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  • If she doesn't wanna become a housewife and considers her man to be her everything and her 1st priority...

    That's my major deal breaker.

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  • A snob girl who's all focused on herself and is sure she's the best and bully's people... or, unless she's an amazing person, for some reason the stereotypical talk thingy for snob girls is a little bit annoying (I'm not sure it's a deal breaker, but it's still a little bit annoying 😂 )

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  • A weak girl in mind and will. If she’s a delicate flower who needs nurturing, leading and protecting all the time ... I’m not interested.

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  • Cognitive distortions, believing conspiracies, a short fuse and aggression persisting beyond the trigger, giving of the sense that the person has lost control. I do not tolerate being dragged into a negative feedback loop.

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  • Love should be pyre like parents do to their children.. If you are noticing mistakes and wanna change him.. Dont go ahead. With time you will find the right one.. Or if your love will be strong enough than these things you mentioned doesn't matter

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  • Being overly religious and/or conservative. Or just politically fringy like super radical feminist or a nazi or something.

    Also taking themselves and life too seriously, judging people for "being lazy" and shit like that

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  • My only deal breakers are obesity, feminism and drugs (including smoking).
    That's it, I swipe right to everything else.

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  • I'd say my number one deal-breaker would have to be if she smokes cigarettes.

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  • Previously cheated or maliciously hurt someone for no reason, rude to others and looks down on people (metaphorically)

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  • She likes rough sex, aka every girl on this planet.

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  • Direspect towards someone trying to please. Not appreciating effort or things he does for you. Also, making him feel that he is doing you a disservice by trying to have sex and pleasure you

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    • I don’t understand the last one, like making you feel she doesn't appreciate the effort you put in plesure her?

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  • Fear, a deal-breaker for are people that afraid to leave their comfort zone. If I can't grow with you and try new things everyday I won't see a future

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What Girls Said 17

  • Mannors

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  • Has children, does drugs (weed included) and doesn't want marriage.

    Personality I would find out later

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  • Appearance wise - Definitely poor hygiene

    Personality wise - manipulative

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  • Poor hygiene, isn't a family person or doesn't like animals are my main dealbreakers

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  • Drugs, no direction in life, cowardly, history of cheating

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  • Any sort of substance abuse
    Doesn't take care of themselves/unhealthy
    Cheating
    Violence

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  • Not willing to get moving forward I can't be with a stuck person

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  • Smokers, dishonesty and cocky to name a few.

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  • Doesn’t give me enough attention

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  • Smoking but that is easy to see and smell

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  • Someone who smokes

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  • Religious, non-goth
    xx
    ~ Mrs Manson

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  • Being full of themselves.

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  • Cheating.

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  • He smokes, or cheating.

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  • If they don’t have the same faith as I do. Arrogance, abusive (mentally and physically), self absorbed and controlling are some of the dealbreakers.

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  • Being a good listener is pretty high on my importance scale. I do have the rule that if he's answering his cell during the first date there won't be a second.

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