1) Never give a man too much information before knowing you. Insecure men will use anything to attack you/lower your self esteem.
2) A man's friends will tell you *almost* everything you need to know about him. Birds of a feather flock together an water seeks it's ok levels.
3) if you're not connecting with a man, don't force it or if something feels off. Water seeks its on levels so obviously you're not compatible.
4) Be wary of men who have female friends or are friend's with their ex's. Most of these men's ex's stick around because they did some emotional damage/manipulative tactics to them. These men have control over these women.
5) don't ever let a man call you dumb, crazy, paranoid, etc. Always trust your intuition, even if it means there is a possibility you could be wrong. Better to put your trust in your own reasoning then someone else's words.
6) learn from watching, observing and listening to other people. The boy who THOUGHT he broke me is actually going around bragging about it. Ignore that too. It doesn't matter how many times you try and reason with them, they'll ALWAYS be negative because they have low self esteem and feed off yours and anyone else around.
7) Be wary of men who have a harem of women around. No really. I don't care what other people tell you. If you see lots of women flirting with a man, avoid his ass. His ego will most likely be very inflated and he'll see you as a option.
8) Don't date popular or ladies man. Never never never. Many women tend to chase after them. However, don't set your standards too low where you're settling for a guy who just can't get a girlfriend because he's socially awkward or whatever. Pretty women will usually swipe up these men fast because they think they're ugly nerds and will do everything anything for a hot girlfriend.
Basically, don't date insecure nerdy or macho men.
Most Helpful Guys
Everyones entitled to an opinion, but let's all realize that you are still 19. Not attacking you but you statements are somewhat politically correct, but could use some fine tuning. For example if a guy has multiple female friends or is still in contact with his ex that doesn't necessarily means he likes to control women or that he seeks attention. He may just prefer that company, or his ex may not know how to move along. A lot of things can and will be taken out of proportion in a woman's view but there's also a lot of women that wouldn't know a good/great man if he was already in there life. I guess every quarter has a 2 sides3
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Well, I'm definitely not the guy for you. I'm not a 'player', but I play the game.
1) I never pressure for information someone doesn't want to give. I don't attack someone's self confidence or esteem. It's a dick move.
2) If a friend isn't talking positively about you to someone who is interested in you, they are not your friend.
3) This isn't the guys fault. If your not comfortable around me, leave, or tell me to fuck off. Trust me I'll go.
4) I'm friends with all but one of my ex's. That one I'm not friends with is bat shit crazy. The others choose to stay because we enjoy the company. Some are married, some have other boyfriends. Hmm, guess I did a lot damage, or manipulated them into finding someone else.
5) Unless it's an obvious joke, as in we are both smiling and laughing. Those words wouldn't come out of my mouth. Otherwise, see #3.
6) If he's bragging, he's not a man. A man is secure in who he is and can exist without some else's validation.
7 + 😎) So because I can walk into just about any club or bar and get the attention of a lot of women, I have an inflated ego? Wow, talk about assumption. Maybe I'm just really good at holding a good conversation. A few years ago I was a photographer with a modeling agency, and all of us would go out for drinks after the shoot. I had lots of beautiful women around me who were naturally flirty. But, if you were to talk to me then I would see you as an option, while not knowing anything about you. Gotcha.
Seriously though. If this works for you, go for it. But, I disagree. I think your making assumptions about people based off one douche bag A-hole encounter. If you want to call out a 'player' all you have to do is check him by throwing challenges in his face "buy me a drink and I'll think about it'" An overconfident dick will get easily flustered, pissy, throw insults back, and then walk away.4
Most Helpful Girls
I have a guy at my work who tried to manipulate me. I became super negative around him so he'd lose his own attraction to me. I'd also stone wall him from time to time. Worked for the most part. He doesn't try shit anymore, especially since after I started telling him off, he was telling everyone how mean I was and gossiping about me at work as a final attempt to bring my esteem down. I told a manager. He knows his place now, and other people aren't on his side. Best part was, I never gossiped. He let his intentions known to other people as well. It's still awkward working with him but he knows the boundaries now.2
I might add, never pick a guy who tries to get you into bed the first date. He isn't wanting to know your mind or the person behind the eyeballs, just your body. Of course this doesn't apply if you too are looking for some action the first date. As the OP (original poster) said, birds of a feather.5