Most Helpful Girl
1) Are you taking medication? There are some women that don't mind as long as you're taking medication to alleviate your disorders.
Here's a dating site that particularly caters to those with bipolar disorders.
But you could attempt a regular dating site as well.
2) Anyone could come up with a rationalization to justify suicide. It doesn't mean it's logical or the best way. I would definitely seek a psychiatrist that will help you.
3) National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
Available 24 hours everyday
I don't know if you're in the U. S. but if you are, call this hotline whenever you feel the need to commit suicide.
Most Helpful Guy
Girls. Very much unlike guys, generally look beyond mere physical when comes to relationship.
To Girls in general, love is important. So is the feeling of security when with her man. Also, commitment, trust and leadership quality are important.
Along those attributes, if you're a kind person, intelligent, have a good career, responsible and trustworthy, then very likely she will overlook your mental illness (as long as you're on medication)
So work at other attributes that girls look at. After you find a girlfriend, you will probably feel better mentally and emotionally.