Did I over react by sending too many messages to him when he disappeared? Have you ever disappeared?

So I was dating a guy and things were going great and then about 2 weeks ago he stopped going online or reading my messages. I sent him about 12 texts asking where he is and I sent him about 6 e-mails asking where he is and I've messaged on on facebook about 12 times.

I later realized I over reacted. I once got angry at an ex-boyfriend when he disappeared for 2 weeks and I found out 9 years later - he had taken a business trip to another province and forgot to tell me about it ahead of time so hadn't ignored me at all - however I started cussing him out cause I mistakenly thought he was pulling a disappearing act on me and when I cussed him out - he decided to break up with me.

I also realized - the guy I'm dating now is probably not ignoring me because we had a break up around 4 weeks before our last date where we reconciled and he sent me a very long e-mail to explain to me why he was breaking up with me - then we went on a date - got close again. So he wouldn't be ghosting me - if he didn't like me - he would have respected me enough to tell me he didn't want to be with me anymore.

Would you be annoyed if a girl sends you around 30 messages asking where you are when you disappear for 2 weeks? Either an unplanned vacation, an embarrassing health problem or family problem, or recovering from surgery but worried people will find out you were sick. I think the surgery is the most likely option right now. I've also considered he might be in a psychiatric institution because he mentioned paying somebody $5000 to do psychological testing on him.


Most Helpful Guy

  • If a girl did that to me, it would be over. My life is peaceful, drama free, and I want stillness. Being sent a flood of messages is too much energy so that would have to be ejected from my life.

    One or two messages is enough.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Sometimes emotions make us act irrational.

    • Not an excuse for shitty behavior

    • Show All
    • @jessture fuck yourself

    • Am I supposed to be offended by that?

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What Guys Said 2

  • So it sounds like you jump to conclusions, you overreact, you expect the world to revolve around you, and you haven't learned from prior mistakes.

    30 messages sent is completely unacceptable. Get the hint after the second one and move on with life.

  • Annoyed? Yes... A simple text like hey how are you
    Or haven't heard from you... Tried calling is everything alright, etc... Should be sufficient... 3 texts tops

    Anything more is going overboard... You shouldn't get angry all time a guy doesn't answer... He might be with the boys...

    If Something might be wrong with his health... I'd suggest checking up on him or contacting the family saying ur worried


What Girls Said 0

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