- Love them as your own
- Love them with a distance
- Indifferent. No love no hate. No bother.
- Hate them kids. Buzzz away!
Most Helpful Guys
What does this mean:
1. Has she had these kids before we got together?
Then we probably would not be together in the first place.
2. Did she get impregnated by someone else while we were dating?
Then I'd dump her for cheating on me.
3. Was she pregnant before we dated and gave birth after we started?
Probably the same as 1.
4. Am I only finding out about the children AFTER we started dating?
I see the omission as a sign that I can't trust her, so I'd dump her.
5. Was she raped during our relationship?
I think this is the only time I'd stick with her and help raise the child. (Aside from if the child were mine, of course.)
Break up. I don't get involved with someone who has kids with another person (unless she is a widow, but even then it's no certainty). I'm not a homewrecker, and she shouldn't be, either. I understand some guys are pieces of shit. But the kids need to be reminded of who their parents are, for better or for worse (even if you didn't officially get married). When a person has kids with someone else, I consider them married - whether it's official or not. It shouldn't be my problem that she got involved with a piece of shit. She can call me a coward or a piece of shit all she wants. She's just trying to make someone else feel like crap for the decision SHE made to sleep with him and have kids with. I don't hate kids, especially when they are well behaved. But I don't love them, especially when they are not (well behaved).
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Most Helpful Girls
I love my step-daughter immensely, and we get along well. I don't push to be loved, or treated as she would treat a mom (her mom has died). I let her decide how she felt about me, and we played it by ear. She is more emotionally close to her Aunt, and I am grateful that they are close. But she knows how I feel about her and what I would do for her. She is lucky, that in the absence of her mother, she has several women who would do anything for her.
A guy I am currently interested in has a child from a previous relationship. It doesn't bother me though, I think his son is absolutely adorable. If I started dating someone with kids, I would of course open my heart to them as well.
I feel like if someone is not willing to love their partner's kids as their own, then they should reconsider getting into a relationship with someone who has children. When you're dating someone with kids, it's different than a "regular" relationship. Their child will always come first (and that's how it should be!) so you have to be willing to let their child in your life too.