What would you do if your current partner has kids with someone else?

  • Love them as your own
    Vote A
  • Love them with a distance
    Vote B
  • Indifferent. No love no hate. No bother.
    Vote C
  • Hate them kids. Buzzz away!
    Vote D
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
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1924

Most Helpful Guys

  • What does this mean:
    1. Has she had these kids before we got together?
    Then we probably would not be together in the first place.
    2. Did she get impregnated by someone else while we were dating?
    Then I'd dump her for cheating on me.
    3. Was she pregnant before we dated and gave birth after we started?
    Probably the same as 1.
    4. Am I only finding out about the children AFTER we started dating?
    I see the omission as a sign that I can't trust her, so I'd dump her.
    5. Was she raped during our relationship?
    I think this is the only time I'd stick with her and help raise the child. (Aside from if the child were mine, of course.)

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  • Break up. I don't get involved with someone who has kids with another person (unless she is a widow, but even then it's no certainty). I'm not a homewrecker, and she shouldn't be, either. I understand some guys are pieces of shit. But the kids need to be reminded of who their parents are, for better or for worse (even if you didn't officially get married). When a person has kids with someone else, I consider them married - whether it's official or not. It shouldn't be my problem that she got involved with a piece of shit. She can call me a coward or a piece of shit all she wants. She's just trying to make someone else feel like crap for the decision SHE made to sleep with him and have kids with. I don't hate kids, especially when they are well behaved. But I don't love them, especially when they are not (well behaved).

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    • the problem is your attitude "not my problem"

    • Show All
    • @Jquesi Apparently, it's not "case closed" because you're still commenting on MY comment. If you don't want to comment further, then stop commenting.

    • Thanks very much for one of the MHGO.

Most Helpful Girls

  • I love my step-daughter immensely, and we get along well. I don't push to be loved, or treated as she would treat a mom (her mom has died). I let her decide how she felt about me, and we played it by ear. She is more emotionally close to her Aunt, and I am grateful that they are close. But she knows how I feel about her and what I would do for her. She is lucky, that in the absence of her mother, she has several women who would do anything for her.

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  • A guy I am currently interested in has a child from a previous relationship. It doesn't bother me though, I think his son is absolutely adorable. If I started dating someone with kids, I would of course open my heart to them as well.

    I feel like if someone is not willing to love their partner's kids as their own, then they should reconsider getting into a relationship with someone who has children. When you're dating someone with kids, it's different than a "regular" relationship. Their child will always come first (and that's how it should be!) so you have to be willing to let their child in your life too.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 22

  • My wife was previously married and had a child with her first husband. They were seperated because he ran off with the babysitter. I have always loved her child as my own.

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  • My thing is how much do I have to deal with the father whether directly or indirectly. All this drama about who has what and when and not making plans or changed because he changed something drives me crazy and away.

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  • if she cheated on me, and the kids were born, and a DNA test told me they weren't mine? Yes I'd stick around for the kids, but forever keep a distance from the mom.

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  • this would never work at least for me i cannot give love to sombody else kid i just can't and even if she was my dream and we would be a pair made in heaven i would say ; NO

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  • If she's widowed I'd embrace them as my own. If she were divorced or single with kids still at home I wouldn't even date her. I do not want baby daddy drama.

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  • You have to embrace them. It won't be the same as your own but you can forge a meaningful relationship.

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  • I've got five kids with my ex wife. I'd be very fine if she already had a kid or two. Because then maybe she wouldn't want more. Mine are almost grown and I don't want to start over. But nearly all women I meet still want kids

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  • I don't have a partner but if i did i'd just go along with it. Everyday i'm bored out of my mind, i need entertaining stuff in my life or i feel like i'll go insane.

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  • Has kids with someone else while they are already in a relationship with me, or already had kids before I met her?

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  • Love them with a distance. If I love them as my own then I would be possessive and not let the biological father meet the child.

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  • I dont care I dated like two girls who had babies now I'm like the step father of 4 kids and some of them love me more than their dad

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  • I'm not playing second best to another man's kids. Only cucks do that.

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  • I hesitate to get involved with any woman, but especially one with kids. I don't want them whether they're mine or someone else's because I have no parenting skills and I would only let them down. And on her end, if their father was nice, then she's already run off one guy who meant well; if the father was a jerk, then she shouldn't have had his kids in the first place. Most women are reasonably fertile well into their thirties, right? It's not like they don't have time. They don't need to rush out and reproduce just to cross it off the bucket list. If people waited until they were sure, this would not be such a prevalent issue.

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  • I can't decide to love someone. That depends of how the kids are tho

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  • I shall let her go (kick off) to live with that other parent of her kids.

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  • If my partner has kids, they're mine. Period.

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  • I would love them and take care of them as my own.

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  • i wouldn't be with someone who already has kids

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  • why would I date someone with kids

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  • If she had kids I haven't dated her

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  • It depends on when she had them. If she already had them before the relationship then I will love them. If she had them after the relationship then clearly she loves someone else more than me so I will leave her and her children alone.

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  • I would never date a women with kids

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What Girls Said 17

  • He wouldn't be my partner to begin with but if I faced such an uncomfortable situation I would try to get friendly with his kids when they visit/if they live with him and if their mother doesn't mind

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  • Honestly i try not to get with someone with kids already because i dont want to have baby mama drama. But to answer your question i would love them as my own.

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  • If you decide to be with someone who has kids, the right thing is to love them as your own and win them over

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  • The kids are not mine. I am a caretaker. It’s a boundaries thing. Of course I would love the kids but grandiose displays of affection and hugs, gifts are for their real mom only.

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  • As long as he is open about it and I will do my best to get along with them and hopefully they do the same with me.

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  • You should always show love and attention to kids. so when they grow up it'll be less likely they'll get involved in drugs and alcohol and crime. Build a better future.

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  • If he had a baby while we were together I would want nothing to do with it.

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  • It would be hard for me to say that I'd love them as my own considering I don't want kids. I'd be nice to them, but that's about as far as I could see myself going.

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  • What is there to do lmaooo, just continue on with the relationship as normal and remember to take his kids into account

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  • Well, it depends how he communicates with his kids. If he loves them, then I will love them too, if he don't contact them, then I would be neutral.

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  • I dont want them to have kids for someone else but if they did I'd like the kids unless they're tiny demon spawns. If they are I'd keep away.

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  • I like older men so if he is 38 for example and has had a wife and kids then I would attemot to make them feel comfortable with me

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  • Love them as your own.
    My husband has kid with his girlfriend , I love the kid as my own

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  • I wouldn't date a guy with kids in the first place

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  • Hate them kids. Buzzz away!

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  • Love the kids as your own. Every child deserves the love of a mother

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  • I would welcome them into my heart. And try to love them, as my own.

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