However, sometimes i find myself thinking about how I was cheated on. I think about the day I found out, and how I wish I had left sooner once things started to not feel right. The pain doesn’t hurt as much as when I first found out. But, it has been 8 months. I wish I could just care less about what happened! Maybe because a part of me blames myself, and wishes it didn’t end that way?
Most Helpful Guys
Things will hurt forever more if you don't lay them to rest. You have to find peace with what happened. That's how we process traumatic events. We remove the trauma from them so that our reaction to triggers isn't to lose our shit. When a memory is filed as being dealt with it is laid to rest. When it is kept as 'pending resolution' then it is always going to cause you problems.
Most Helpful Girls
Yes its because he hurt you and left wounds in your heart and spirit - injuries take time to heal - they aren't like benign events that can disappear faster. Remember how your relationship is in comparison to your old relationship and carry that with you.
Being betrayed hurts, and just like any other pain, it takes time to get over. It's been years since it happened to me and I'm in a loving relationship but I still find myself being suspicious and over analyzing things to make sure I don't get hurt again. I believe being betrayed that way alters you. It messes with your self esteem, makes you question how observant and alert you are, and makes you yearn for a chance to undo it somehow. It doesn't mean you aren't happy, you were just mislead and mistreated. You'll be okay though.