What makes a guy see a girl as having relationship potential rather than just a hookup?


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What Guys Said 3

  • For me traits like: Loyalty, kindness, a caring nature, not manipulative, some degress of selflessness, intelligence, passion, having hobbies, and being considerate to male feelings/emotions. What I mean by that is that I see it as unattractive if you don't care how your boyfriend feels about something, be dismissive/uncaring towards or rude towards your boyfriend for being emotional.

    If you find emotions unnattractive in a partner then in my opinion you're just a hookup. Some women will emotionally repress boyfriends/sons and it is destructive. Some will try to let their partner be expressive but feel less and less attracted to their partner as a result and this is also damaging as it makes them less likely to open up in the future if and when they pick up on the fact that it's unnattractive.

    I want a partner who won't try to manipulate me or repress my emotions, use me, cheat on me, and preferably I want traits that make me feel more secure my partner won't do these things. I want my partner to have things she enjoy, preferably things we can enjoy together, I want to be able to talk to my partner about any topic and for us to have long fruitful conversations, and if im honest (its kind of embarrassing to admit as a man) I want a partner who will make me feel loved and cared about as well as secure their feelings for me aren't going to (seemingly) suddenly change.

    I have trust issues...

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    • Sorry if I rambled. I guess most importantly I want love and romance, even if it is naive. I don't want to settle for what society seems to expect; where I find a seemingly nice girl, go back to being emotionally repressed to make sure I dont push her away, move in with her, support her financially, marry her, have a child, she files for divorce (perhaps because I drink to emotionally repress), I pay child support for years, and then I either spend the rest of my life cynical about it or go back into the cycle for another attempt at a successful marriage.

  • Nothing. If he is the kind of person to do hook ups then he doesn't see sex as something special and could easily cheat or leave once he finds someone more appealing.
    If he is the relationship kind of person he will go on a few dates to get to know her to see if she is a good match for a relationship or not.

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    • People of both genders will sometimes engage in hook ups while they dont feel ready for/are waiting for the right relationship. How can you say that engaging in hookups makes someone not a "relationship kind" of person? Why does sex need to be special/reserved for relationships?

  • If I actually enjoy spending time with her, and also if I'm actually looking for a relationship.

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