Can high school relationships last after college?

My boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 years and 4 months. He is in college and I am in high school for my last year. He is so busy he doesn’t think he has time for a relationship with me. I mean I understand cause I have school and band and he has college that comes with classes, activities, and friends. He is probably so overwhelmed about also having a relationship. His first week at college we texted a good 10 texts the whole week, probably because he thought it was going to be easier. He told me the first couple days were bad with us not talking but then he said he was okay because he was busy. We have talked about breaking up and he almost went through with it because of the lack of talking and how hard it was. I was pushing him tho a lot the whole week I was like are you going to break up with me, I think you’re going to break up with me, etc. We almost didn’t even see each other yesterday when he got home and it was kind of different, every time we brought it up I cried or I pushed. We have talked about how if we did, and after we get out of college if we meet up how we would both be open to it. I asked unlike his other girlfriends would I be a mistake and he said far from it, but he is being distant and I don't know if that is because he’s taking it day by day or what I don't know. I love him and I know he loves me but I don't know what to do.

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Most Helpful Guys

  • It's possible, but it's definitely a longshot. Only two couples I know of made it to marriage from high school relationships. Both couples are still married today.

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    • Probably because of many obstacles they have overcome

    • A couple with one but they never broke up.

  • I thought so... but it's not as easy as you think. Love or no love.
    I hate to say it but it sounds to me like he has other girls he's interested in and probably views you as a "kid" now.
    Maybe it's time to move on for a while. If you're both still in love you can always get back together later.

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    • Wym kid?

    • It just happens. Even though you are only a year or two apart, when you're in college and your girlfriend is still in HS, it just seems that way. You're surrounded by older girls who are doing things none of the girls (usually) were doing in HS, partying with them among other things, just a lot of adult stuff going on that doesn't happen much in HS.
      You don't mean to, but you just see high school people as kids when you are in college. It causes a lot of relationships to go bad.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Mostly relationships from high school don’t last. College life can be busy. It’s so different from what you’re used to. You both will change and have to find a way to still see each other. As long as you both put in the effort that it needs, you two might make it. But only few succeed.

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    • We are taking it day by day but he’s getting distant but I think I’m pushing him while I keep bringing it up instead of being in the moment

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    • Thank you we are going to take things day by day

    • You’re welcome! 😊

  • Break up. It sounds like he wants to, but you're pushing him in the opposite direction. So he's slowly detaching himself from you.

    You should break up before your contrasting desires actually start effecting your relationship and view of one another. Most highschool relationships don't work out after highschool.

    Ik it's hard and it hurts, but I garuntee ignoring what he wants will just exacerbate the problem. If he thinks it's time, don't advise him differently. There's other people out there. Just let him go.

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What Guys Said 25

  • Yes. A relationship lasting long has everything to do with Commitment and trust.

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    • What about timing? Like and growth. I think we to the point where it is a possibility and I don’t know how to get us out of that besides taking it day by day

  • 90% of them. nope

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  • I'm going to be honest. Most High School relationships don't last after HS. Including mine. We dated from 8th grade through senior year, went to different high schools but still stayed together. Eventually we broke up. Dating as an adult is much different from in HS. You might only be able to see each other a few times a week, and you're not going to be able to text back and forth all day. The only way you guys would be able to stay together is if you agree to see each other maybe once or twice a week, don't text that often, and maybe if you can have a long phone call every other night. Me and my HS girlfriend dated for 4.5 years, and when we broke up we didn't want to, but we didn't have time for each other. We were able to still date for a little bit by doing what I told you to do, but eventually, we just had to face reality. Now it's almost 4 years later, and we're getting to know each other again. I know it's difficult, but you either need to consider an adult relationship, not texting all day, not seeing each other every single day, and be able to put yourself first, or you need to face the inevitable future and break up. It doesn't have to be permanent, but HS relationships don't last. The ones that do carry on all the petty drama you went through as kids in HS to marriage, and Everytime you have a fight, someone will bring up something that you did in highschool, and those marriages almost always end in a bitter divorce. It's up to you, but I'd suggest taking a break from each other.

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  • It's possible. My parents started dating at the end of their senior year of high school. Now they went to the same university, so they had that working in their favor. They studied different things though, and my mom did WAY too much work; she finished what should have been a six-year program in three and a half years. They've been married for 36 years now.

    So it is possible. Don't pin all your hopes on it, but it can be done.

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  • If a relationshio, and indeed love, is worth it from your pov, you will each make time, so make the time for him, and hopefully he will make the time for you, nothing else should be more important than the people you love.

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  • No, women only go to college to be whores and practice hypergamy.

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    • I’m waiting til marriage and my boyfriend knows that and my boyfriend would not do that

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    • Who me? It’s been a thing and I trust him

    • No, not you... The guy who made the stupid comment.

  • I'm afraid that most relationship like that end because college is a time where you meet so many people and hook ups are so easy. I'm sorry but I think he is making excuses to leave you and keep you on his good side

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  • Absolutely. I know of more than one couple that were high school sweethearts that have been married for over 2 or 3 decades and still married.

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  • Yes. But in your case it doesn't sound like love. More like a relationship by convenience. If college (a new environment) makes him ok with a breakup then the relationship wasn't genuine to begin with

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  • (I didn't read the details because I hate reading, lol). Anyways, it's possible for sure. However, as a general rule, high school relationships don't usually last very long.

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  • As long as you want to be together and share the same desires it should last a lifetime. Communication is the key to keeping a relationship alive.

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  • my parents' relationship started when my mom was 17 my dad like 15 or 16

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  • Most likely not to happen unless the couple really love each other and are willing to sacrifice other things for their relationship

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  • Yes, but very rarely for a long time. It's up to the two people to maintain it and keep it going.

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  • It can last only if you can handle long distance relationships if you don't go to the same collage

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    • I am a senior and he’s now a freshman in college we won’t be able to go to the same college because his doesn’t hold my major and it will take me 5 to 7 years to graduate and he needs 4. Rn I don’t know I am trying but I don't know

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    • We have been dealing with not seeing each other because we did go to different high schools but I wanna talk to him about where he is

    • He must have hidden agendas if he's not talking to you

  • sometimes they last, but most it won't last

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  • Sure baby

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  • Of course they can

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  • Yes.

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  • If you love him, it can easilly last 4ever.

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  • 3 of my close friends been married since

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    • I don’t know how we can get better with communication and stuff with his lack of time

    • I was in your situation and loved the girl very much. I -MADE- time to keep our relationship going. It was really hard for both of us and she ended up going out with someone from the school she was still in. I can't say I blame her. We did end up getting back together for a few years and had a daughter together. We aren't together today though.

  • Yeah

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  • Yes it depends... if only he loves u...

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  • My high school relationship lasted, and we married. But I think that was because we went to the same college.

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  • no, they do not

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What Girls Said 12

  • Definitely! I met my fiance in high school. We first dated in college. 20+ years of exclusively dating later, we're getting married next year.

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    • Did you guys go to different colleges we were at different high schools and he’s one year older. We are hanging from a line rn we need help and I need to stop bringing it up and worrying so you have any advice for us or me or him in college I want him and I’m tried of thinking about being without him

  • There is a good possible chance yes.. It can last
    But if he is cheating on you and etc and you r doing the same or something different.. then no it wouldn't last

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    • He said he would tell me if he was interested in someone

  • Sometimes. My partner and I got together at 15 and are still together now. It works for some

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    • Through college?

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    • How did you make it work

    • Well, we lived together which helped :P It wasn't hard really, we enjoy each other's company and since we still got to see each other, we were just able to help each other through the stress.

  • It does. Um. My ex and I we're together through high school and university. Anything is possible once you love each other.

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    • Did you guys break up after?

  • Some do. But in my opinion it is not the smartest thing to do

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  • I'm currently still with my high school boyfriend. We've been together for almost 6 years. Has it been hard? You better damn believe that shit. We didn't go to the same college. I studied abroad for a year in London during which he didn't agree with my decision to go and broke up with me before I left. We dealt with a lot, but we both fought for the relationship. Are you fighting by yourself? That's what you have to figure out. So you both still want the same things. Because it can work, but it's gonna be work to keep it up and if you both ain't willing to put up the fight then it's going to fail.

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  • No. But try to make it work if that's what you want for the time being

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  • Can they? Yes. Is it likely? No.

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  • Difficult

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  • Most of the time no
    xx
    ~ Mrs Manson

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  • yes!

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  • I mean they can but...

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