We had made plans to met earlier in the week and we were supposed to get drinks again. I told him I would meet him in town after I had a quick drink with my friend who had recently graduated univetsiy.
This was all ok with him however he said something along the lines of “it would have been nice to see ya” and I questioned him on the use of past tense and then asked if we were still meeting? He goes yes we are. However, somehow in the space of 30 minutes he begins to say he had no plans to go out that night and was already in his pjs. I’m like?
He asked to change our drinks to the next night, he wanted to have “real plans” this time. I freaked out a bit because I was literally in the bar waiting for him and all dressed up. I asked him to come in to town and expressed my disbelief that he was going to stand me up at such short notice. He accused me of being drunk when I wasn’t and said he’d talk to me tomorrow. He never did.
Its been 2 days now with neither word between us. I feel there was great miscommunication but I’m also hurt that despite my asking he knowingly left me alone in a bar.
Do I message and ask “What happened the other night” or do I not message and cut my losses?
part of me is really hurt and disappointed in him, like he could have been a lot nicer and followed through with texting me the next day. Another part of me isn’t sure what to make of the situation, he did try making plans to see me on a different day and said it would have been nice to see me but then he gets mean and accused me of being drunk then dismisses me. What should I do?
- Reach out and message him
- Cut my losses and not message him
Most Helpful Guys
Disclaimer: I also do not drink in bars for various reasons. One of which is that I only drink hard liquor.
Note: The following is based on pure speculation and should be discussed in person with him.
“it would have been nice to see ya” To me seems like he accepted you'd be unavailable, went home and started getting drunk gaming with this friends. At least that's what I would do in that situation.
Honestly "real plans" means he wanted a date. No alcohol, just a good time.
P. S. I've ruined plenty of these moments when they came to me, so good luck.
Most Helpful Girls
if he is into you he would not be flaky. that is a truth, not an opinion. if he really likes you he will say "ill be out of town for 2 weeks. i will make plans when i get back". ie. NOT flaky. reaching out makes you look deaparate and like a stalkerish loser. why does this matter now with this guy? it probably doesn't! he doesn't give a flying hoot! BUT when you come off as a desparate loser it WILL effect your self esteem and this could effect the aura you send off to your next date who really might end up being someone of true potential. so I would not message this cureent guy who is clearly a dud.
This hit the spot of flaky people who we unfortunately like and wanna see again. RED FLAG. Dontttt go after him!
As much as you want to go after him, it’s just gonna hurt you more. He’s alreDy showing red flag signs. Is that boyfriend material? Nope. If you already knew of his flaky history, take that as another red flag he’s not gonna be looking for something real soon or easily. He def caught your attention and that was it. He’s a douche. He made you waited last min. Love yourself enough to go after someone who will also chase you. If he’s not tryna make it up to you, he’s def not for you. Even if there is a misunderstanding, if he wanted you enough, he would clear it. Save your potential heartbreak from him and give your effort and time for someone else who is worth it.
One day you’ll look back at how confusing it was, but you’ll be happy you dodge this bullet. (: Its how I look back at all the wrong guys that I’ve never worked out with and this is one of them for you.