Why was he so rude to me on the first date?

I matched with this guy on tinder about ten months ago. But decided last minute not to go because I had a feeling that he was after sex. I recently matched with him again, apologized for flaking on him, and he said it's fine and looked forward to meeting me, so then I decided to not be judgmental and give him a chance. When we meet he pulled up in his car and was hostile as soon as I sat down. He mentioned the first time I brushed him off and asked me what I do for a living. I felt interrogated and like he was trying to me down (baring in mind I'm a successful copywriter with years of experience). He kept arguing with me over my job which I found really weird and pointless. We. were initially meant to meet for a drink but we pulled up at his flat, so I asked him why we're here. He said he needs to change and it shouldn't take long. Then when we got the lift to his he mentioned that he invested time into me (if you called texting to confirm the date investing) and that he's surprised he's giving me a chance. He then sniffed my neck and. when I told him to stop he said we're too different because I'm too conservative? at this point I wanted to leave but he kept ushering me to his. He then confirmed that he planned to bring me over for sex... at this point I just said he's holding a grudge and he disagreed. I apologized I don't get what else he wants me to say.. I said you're not the nice guy that you claimed to be and he walked me halfway to the station in silence. This 'date' lasted fifteen minutes... I'm still angry over it as he wasted my time and effort to see him. Do you agree that he was being mean spirited? What do you think was going through his mind because I don't get it.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I obviously don't really know what he was thinking but my guess from what you've said is that he's just a jerk and probably treats most people that way and that he only wanted sex and really didn't care about treating you well because he wasn't interested in any kind of relationship with you other than sex.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Why do you care? Be happy it was only fifteen minutes and now it is over. Just move on with your life

    • It only happened last night, but I'll get over it eventually.

    • Then I can understand why its on your mind. I suggest instead of trying to figure out what was going on with him, try to think of what it was you were interested in him for and what the red flags were so you don't end up in a similar situation. You gut was right the first time, you should have trusted it

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What Guys Said 2

  • You were just an excuse for a fuck. He wanted to impress on you how powerful and intimidating he is.
    Think yourself lucky you got away in one piece.

  • just a drop kick player

    • most apps now on net are 80% full of players guys/girls, scammers, call girls/guys,
      it not as easy find genuine, you need make sure prove genuine & keep word before meet,
      always meet crowded place not their cars, keep phone location on & tell someone where ment be,
      you did good getting out of there, he argued bout your job to try lower your self esteem make easier target some of the more nasty players do,

    • Yes, I've definitely learnt my lesson now. Need to trust my gut instincts more often. Thanks for your advice!

    • yw stay safe

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