A guy I like is not willing to pursue me because of a driving distance of two hours. Bullshit or valid excuse?
What Guys Said 43
It's still kind of an LDR and onerous to constantly drive that far. Makes the relationship tougher. If a guy has other Options Closer to him, he'll usually choose them.
Valid, considering it's just the first meeting. Long distance relationships are hard enough when the relationship is developed. Why bother start up a relationship with the long distance there already. Plus, when a guy meets a girl from a far city, town, or country, etc. It's mostly understood that's its just a fling or a vacation mode hooking up.
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Some people are okay with long distance, some people need a close proximity, I think his excuse is reasonable regardless of if it is true or false.
Either way, do you really want to be with a guy who makes excuses and doesn't text back in a timely manner?
Well, it just depends on the person and what they want. Two hours is a lot and if cuts out getting to see each other all the time and to be spontaneous. Two hours is also workable, you can meet half way and take turns visiting the other. If two hours to more than they want to deal with distance wise, you can't really fault it.
Valid excuse. 4 hours round trip is hella far especially if he’s a student that takes his studies seriously or even a job that he works hard and long hours for.
If he says it’s too far take his word for it. Pushing him into doing something would be a red flag to him. Just keep in touch with text, Snapchat, etc.
Valid. Petrol (or gas as they call it in the US) is expensive these days. Maybe he just wants someone closer.
Valid. I dated someone that was 1.5 hrs away, which I thought was no big deal at all. However over time, as we got closer and closer, we naturally wanted to see more and more of each other and life just didn't "allow it". It just became harder and harder to "make it happen". This contributed to us breaking up for sure. It wasn't the ONLY reason, but one of them definitely.
So…you pursue him.
Like…why the guy should be the one taking the distance every time? And girl just…be a gril, I guess…
Equality. This is what it looks like. Sometimes it's on you.
And maybe, when you show you're willing, he change his mind. And if not, then just after that termination would be an option.
I wouldn't date someone two hours away from me.
If we clicked I would have tried to stay in touch just for the sake of flirting a bit and chatting from time to time, but not for much more.
Welcome to equality, perhaps you should do the progressive thing and pursue him.. what a novel idea right not making him do all the work? When my wife and I were long distance we split the travel, I would go to her 50% of the time, and she would come to me 50% of the time.. by the way she lived 4 hours away..
If it was a you come here I go there occasion kind of thing I would go for it. But I also drive a lot for work about the same distance so it would also depend on where I was each week. Spending 6 hours in a car after working 8 hours is hard on anybody. To add an additional 2-4 hours. Would be hard.
That is valid especially if just can't afford all the gas to make those drives and it is not just a guy thing, women are far worse over driving distances. I have been rejected by women for living more than 30 minutes away.
It is a valid reason. Distance can create doubt and jealousy which is harmful. Ot may aldo be due to past experiences getting hurt in long distance relationships.
Bullshit, personally. I've traveled twice that to spend a couple hours with my girlfriend when we first started dating. It was expensive but worth it.
If he doesn't want a relationship then it's not up to you. He can turn you down for any reason he wants.
Seems like a common excuse. Women have used it on me many times when using dating apps.
I think it's a good devision. I want my girlfriend to live near to me.
When she has problems I want to have the option to cheer her up and I hate to phone.
I would be willing to drive 2 hours to maintain a relationship. But to pursue a potential one? She would have to be pretty special.
Distance is only time, so dont waste it on someone that uses that as an excuse , move on
not worth your time,
I would drive two hours for you!
Seems reasonable. Two hours is a long way. It makes it a 4 hour round trip
It's tough but it's only 2 hours of a journey as take turns to go up and down to each other
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What Girls Said 8
He might have other options that are closer. Maybe he doesn't want to do long distance.
In my opinion, long distance is hard and it takes real commitment. Based off meeting each other once it would be worth meeting a couple of times after before he even knows if its a commitment he wants to bother with. There's no saying he shouldn't give it a chance but its understandable if he feels he couldn't do it. At least he's not roped you into a relationship to then let you down because "its just not working".
Absolutely valid, not everyone is open to the challenges of a distance relationship so won’t waste their time starting one
I think it's valid. I dated someone who lived that far. Too much gas money.
Very very valid.
If you've no problem driving down to see him he should have no trouble
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