What is it that women look for in men?

I know this is an age-old question. But I just want some opinions from the total set. I consider myself a nice guy, humorous, not too good looking (haha), but well-educated and read. I'm 28, and I have some personal setbacks, none caused by myself, but by circumstances out of my control.

I show respect for everyone, I try to be nondiscriminatory. But it seems like every time I meet someone and get to know them better, they turn out being crazy (sorry, but I must be blunt), or have issues that seem too great for me to deal with. I do try to help these people whenever possible.

I really don't know what I'm doing wrong. I'm just looking for advice on how to better myself and somewhere where I could possibly find a date. lol

Again, I have respect for everyone I meet, so that's not the issue. I'm just trying to figure things out. Any ladies see areas of improvement that could be worked on? I'm open to all suggestions and answers, no matter how course they may be. So fire away. lol

Also, thanks for your time reading and hopefully responding.


Most Helpful Girl

  • The first problem I see that you have is you seem to lack confidence in your looks. You are a good looking guy. Just because you don't look like David Beckham doesn't mean you don't look good. I say this all the time but a man has to be confidant in all aspects of himself to be attractive. If you want to attract a woman who feels that she is as sexy and confidant as you think she is you have to project those qualities. Be independent not dependant. See my answer about what makes a woman fall in love with a man. These are all qualities I look for in a man. Don't ever talk down about yourself. Own your life and your situation and don't apologize for it.

    • Sarah, like I said before, I've been through an awful lot. I'm perfectly fine with my looks, although I know I need to lose some weight lol. The main issue of my last gf, and I'm going to be blunt, she cheated. So it's more of a trust thing with me right now. And again, a setback I had at age 11, and that was me being humble btw lol. Maybe I shouldn't be as-humble? I'm confused, cause I view that as prideful. Maybe I need to distinguish between the two? I'd love to hear back from you! ~B

    • I'm not trying to say you should go around telling people you are the sh*t and the hottest guy in the room. It just concerned me when you said not too good looking. If you said average looking or not too bad looking I wouldn't have seen a problem. I think you should just know that you are a good looking guy because if you know it people will see your confidence. I had to go through many years of hating my body and the way I look and a lot of self pep talks to realize I'm not so bad.

    • I don't think it is reasonable to say you truly don't care what others think about you but if you can get as close to that as you can your confidence in yourself will benefit greatly from that. I am sorry you had someone cheat on you but sometimes harsh things are the best to learn from. The more you experience, be it good or bad, the more mature you become and the more respect you will have for yourself for surviving it. Just know you are worth while and if someone doesn't like it their loss.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • does it matter what women want in a guy? to be honest, it doesnt, because women don't know what they want. be yourself and that will take you far.

  • It would help to not list the women you have met as crazy lol Everyone has some issues or personal setbacks. If you meet someone, you should try to overlook these things as long as they are not destructive (smoking, drugs, excessive drinking, gambling, etc.) It's great that you try to help, but don't be discouraged if you can't. Some issues need to be worked out within the individual.

    Maybe you're being too picky - do you have an ideal in mind of the perfect woman and you haven't met her yet?

    • The ones that I call crazy, those are the ones that are still trying to work through issues. Well, one actually. But you should meet her. lol. And I know, trust me, that pickiness could possibly be playing a role in the decision-making process(es) that go through my mind. But honestly, I don't consider myself picky. Those personal setbacks I mentioned have a lot to do with it- I need someone understanding + patient. Thnx for the advice. If you wish to rsvp, that would be great. Thanks!

What Guys Said 1

  • Would you be attracted to yourself (not just physically, but over all)?