A woman who is recently divorced (with a 3 year old) told me she is not ready for a relationship but still calls?

and wants to hang out. Ordinarily, my first thought is she is not interested in me. But, she has gone out of her way to contact me and hang out. She was with her ex for 10 years and I am the first guy she has seen since. She prefaced our "talk" about relationships with she was nervous about starting out again.


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What Girls Said 2

  • she has just gotten out of a relationship and she wants to take it slow so she doesn't make the same mistake again. just give her time and reason to not doubt that you are the real thing.

    • I am fine with slow. I realize she is starting out on her own again, new career and focus on her child. I told her the ball is in her court and that we can play things by ear and see. As noted below, I did not expect her to contact me again but she has and wants to meet up again when her son is with the father next week. Usually, not ready for a relationship and scared of dating means...I don't want to date/hang with you

    • you guys can date and hang out, just don't get too physical too quick and also don't start saying stuff like "you mean everything to me, or I love you" too soon and too much. Like you said, just play it by ear and hang out with her like a friend for a while until she makes it official

  • Sounds as if she just wants a friend.

    How do you feel about her? Do you see her as dating material?

    Usually if someone is just divorced you will have a lot of hoops to jump through before she will lower her walls. Also, be careful of being the rebound guy.

    • I went in with no expectations and also didn't (and don't) want to jump into anything. She is fun to be around and enjoy her company. There is a mutual physical connection (she brought that up). I am fine with taking it slow but am not used to the "not ready for a relationship" meaning anything more than not interested. Usually, that is followed by no contact from that person and she has gone out of her way to try to keep meeting up.

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    • Ha. I realize texting isn't that big of a deal but if not interested at all why initiate the contact. I guess playing it by ear and seeing what happens the best way to go. Nothing ventured nothing gained (with limited expectations)

    • Good luck...and keep us posted on the progress! :)

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