Do most women do stuff in return for chivalry?

There was a question I just saw about guys pumping gas, here:

Ladies: Does your boyfriend pump gas for you? Guys: Do you pump gas for your girlfriend?

It's only recently that I heard of this and realised that it's even a thing. I've always been the driver, none of my girlfriends have ever driven themselves.

Most of the girls there seem to say that they like this. Girls here seem to like chivalry in general. Many say that they like when a guy pays for a date, opens doors for them etc. Many even expect it. I'm not gonna go off on a rant about whether this is good or bad, I'm just curious.

I wonder what these women do in return? The reason I ask is that it doesn't seem like most women do anything in return. Maybe it's just my own experience but my girlfriend is the only girl I've been with who does things to reciprocate, and strangely has even had friends tell her that she shouldn't.

Today most people believe in equality right? A large percentage of these women probably care a lot about it. It also seems like when men ask for certain things we're labelled chauvinists. If a man expects a woman to cook for him for example.

Most women in my experience seem to have a mentality of "he can make his own food", like they think that doing anything nice for him is somehow degrading. In fact these are the kinds of comments my girlfriend has gotten from other women when doing these things for me.

Yet these same women then expect a man to act like a gentleman. Like they're offended when a man asks them to do traditional woman stuff, but they love it when a man does traditional man stuff.

I've always wondered what guys get in return. When a girl says "I like it when a guy pays the bill because it shows that he's invested in me, and if he doesn't then he's not worth it" or they complain about the lack of gentlemanly behaviour, I always wonder "well what do you do in return to make it worth it for him?"

What do you do?

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Most Helpful Guys

  • In my experience, not a damn thing
    but I haven't met every woman so, I don't know.

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  • They've been fed a complete line of bullshit from the FI, feminism. It's a complete failure for all parties involved.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Chivalry shouldn’t have a “return price” - it’s something makes we’re brought up to show in my early days and I’m sure it’s still around but is it as well accepted? I really don’t know but I still love being treated as a lady

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    • 7d

      Why shouldn't it have a return price?

    • Show All
    • 7d

      "Chivalry shouldn’t have a “return price” "
      It absolutely does though.
      The problem is, when the idea of chivalry was conceived, there was an unspoken social contract, enforced by social norms, for both sexes.
      Men had to behave chivalriously and treat women well.
      In exchange women were nice, chaste, followed social norms, didn't exploit their beauty, and were nice with men.

      The problem is that with the sexual emancipation, women got cocky, and forgot these social contracts. Men woke up slowly, but now that men have realised women won't give anything back for their chivalry, men won't be following this social norm either, since there's nothing to incentivise it.

      Women dug this hole for themselves.

    • 7d

      @Benedek38

      Right. I won't do those things if a girl doesn't reciprocate. I think that feminism has a lot to do with this shift, because feminism has taught women that acting in this way is degrading to them, and that if a man expects the same he's "entitled" and "sexist".

      This is why I think most people are saying that chivalry isn't really chivalry if you expect anything in return. Men are still expected to be chivalrous, to act in a traditional way because women like it. Women are not and they've been told that it's wrong if a guy expects anything from them. They aren't held to any standard and they reject it when men do, in fact some become hostile.

      It's a huge double-standard. An example of hoe this leads to one sided relationships would be for example my friend who worked 80+ hours a week, his girlfriend didn't work at all. She'd spend his hard earned money on herself - nails, hair, expensive clothes etc. Then, when he got home from work, she'd expect him to do half of the housework, cook his own food, and she refused to wash his clothes. Comoletely one sided.

      And it seems that women aren't even shamed for that behaviour. If a man didn't work, didn't really do anything for a woman, and exoected her to cook and clean for him, have sex with him whenever he wsnts, most people would tell her to dump that loser. I can understand not wanting to do things for that kind of man. But when it's the other way around women say to men "you should do nice things without exoecting anything in return". "Expecting me to do anything is bad" - when they have all kinds of expectations of men.

      I'm not surprised at the lack of female answers because so far the answer has pretty much been "we do nothing in return and you're wrong to expect it", confirming everything that I said.

  • I don't know I hold open a door for a guy every once in a while though

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  • Because feminists are cancer, they ruin relationships

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What Guys Said 5

  • I live in Oregon where they still have the archaic law where you can't pump your own gas so no but that's because I'm not allowed to otherwise I probably would.

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  • My girlfriend always repays the favors I make her and some more.
    That, and she's always so kind and thoughtful with me, sometimes I feel ashamed.

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  • Yeah, they'll cheat on you for some arrogant guy with a six-pack, huge dick and lots and lots of money.

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  • If you do it expecting a return, it isn't chivalry.

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  • You dont expect anything in return, that is the point of chivalry.

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