3 mo

Ghosted twice... what the hell?

1.) Met a girl on Match. She had been acting flighty beforehand (canceling at the last minute, long delays on text). We finally met for drinks. Lots of open body language, touching, chemistry and laughs. We talked for 2.5 hours, went to two different bars, made plans for a second date, and even a kiss at the end. By all accounts a "perfect" date.

Texted her the next day, said I had a good time, and asked a jokey question referencing something the night before... nothing.

Called her two days later to confirm plans. Went straight to voicemail. Left text saying "we still on for Thursday?"... nothing. Ghosted.

2.) Met a girl through a freelance gig. She had acted enthusiastic beforehand on text. Once again, went out last night, lots of chemistry, talking, etc. Talked for 3 hours. We made plans to see each other this upcoming Friday. There was a friendly kiss at the end (just a peck). I texted her when I got home when I remembered I had plans. I said I wanted to see her before she leaves on vacation and could we rescheduled. Nearly 24 hours later and nothing. I'm afraid I've been ghosted... again.

Look I get it. It's a numbers game. Plenty of fish in the sea. Etc. But this is starting to give me a complex. Like, if you have a great date by all outward appearances (laughing, touching, talking for 2+ hours, making plans, even kissing) only for them to IMMEDIATELY go ghost... well, if leaves me scratching my head.

You can say - "You shouldn't have texted her afterwards"... but is texting afterwards THAT big of a turn-off that you can go from making future plans to ghosting? Like I said, I don't know what I'm doing wrong and I don't know how to gauge a good date anymore. If I enjoy myself, and they appear to enjoy themselves, but they ghost... what they hell?
Ghosted twice... what the hell?
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