I had a crush on this guy and I really liked his character. Later on, he said he likes me and I told him that I need some time. I suggest to be friends and get to know to each first before we become couples. Eventually, I really thought there's nothing wrong with him and I commited to him. Once I coupled, I feel so annoying. It's like I'm forcing myself to talk to him and spend time with him. I don't feel happy anymore. He's talking about marriage and I feel like I'm not ready at all. I don't feel any spark and on our 2nd date things got heated up in theatre and he kissed me (my first kiss). I thought its gonna be special but he ruined it. I don't feel any shit. I feel like I'm useless and I know I'm hurting him. I talked to him about it and I feel so bad for hurting him coz he literally cried. I told him I'm just confused and I feel so bad and I patch with him back. But now I'm getting confused again.
The worst part was he did asked me then why the fuck you kissed me. I didn't kiss him at all. He was the one who were kissing me on my lips and I didn't return and he tried to shove his tongue and I pushed him back.