3 mo

We want what we can't have?

So this guy and I have been 'fooling around' for about a year now. Off and on, and only a handful of times. I really liked him and experienced my first sexual experience where my partner was soothing as I woke up and panicked (I have anxiety towards sex... long story). I'm thinking this is why/how I developed feelings.
After maybe 3 different nights together he made a point to make sure I knew that he wasn't looking for a relationship as I was. He wanted to enjoy being single and screw around (i dont understand why that is still a thought at 28 years but to each their own).
The beginning of this year I found out that he was dating this... provocative girl... monomagously so we stopped our fooling around.
How do I end up being the first one he tells when she breaks up with him and stay the night... he makes all these comments like 'women like a man that. ... right?' When we're around mutual friends etc.

My question is what's his deal? Okay, he enjoys being intimate with me but what's so horrible about dating me (someone who would literally bend over backwards for my partner) and dating her (someone who doesn't respect themselves and has a 'slut' persona? I don't think I'm that bad looking...
Updates:
3 mo
Should I ask him what the heck or just accept that this is the way it is?

I've been distant from him because I have started talking to someone (who wants a relationship) and now he's starting conversations and writing these long texts... ugh, men. Lol
We want what we can't have?
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