Have an opinion?
No I don't. I know guys who aren't conventionally attractive who don't struggle at all in dating because they're very confident, sometimes bordering on arrogant/cocky. Then there are guys who are good looking and seem to have everything going for them yet they struggle because they're lacking in confidence. I'm also not conventionally attractive. As a teen I was that shy polite kid these women are saying they want - that got me nowhere. I became more confident as time went on and I became like the guys I mentioned above - and then dating wasn't a problem for me at all. So I've experienced both sides of that myself, and I know it's bullshit.
I think confidence is overrated... in terms of how people speak about it. Its more a combination, having experiences, looking "clean", well dressed even when you are casual, having manners. That takes some work and effort. Maybe for models attractiveness and confidence are attached. Yet personally I differ, I think a person might be attractive and not necessarily have confidence. I believe confidence its actually what our "main stream" culture and media portraits. Its subtle, not upfront or loud. People who have build insight, work knowing themselves those inspire confidence.
I can't watch the video at the moment. However, I know that confidence in dating situations and attractiveness are separate qualities that tend to link together. A person who feels that they are attractive is more likely to be confident when talking to a potential partner. There are exceptions. Some people have a poor mental image of themselves and may lack confidence despite being attractive. Then you have other people (think highly successful geeks - someone like Bill Gates) that may not be attractive but manage to be very confident.
I think the question is actually somewhat recursive since I think a confident language actually improves looks. I don't mean in the sense that it can make a morbidly obese guy look like he's in good health. But I do think it can make a very good-looking guy drop a few points in average rating, just asking people to rate looks, if he looks all nervous and timid and scared all the time.
I actually think confidence even changes the shape of your body and posture. It's like you take a young Brad Pitt, and filled him with all sorts of social insecurities, suddenly that strong and tall posture might change to droopy, shoulders forward, kind of hunched look, always looking down, and his body might even change shape a bit as a result (more of a gut, e. g.).
But I genuinely think it changes the looks this way, especially after long periods of time. Of course like if we take Chris Reeves portraying a shy and nervous Clark Kent like this:He doesn't look much worse than as Superman, but that's a confident actor pretending to be insecure and afraid. He's not going to be able to fake it that well. Take someone who has genuinely been insecure for a good portion of their lives, and their whole posture would likely be different, their body shape different, their facial expressions really awkward and so much more unnatural, etc.
Not at all. I dated a guy who was not attractive at all for years, just because he was the MAN. He carried himself like he was the most confident guy in himself and that was all I needed. Here's something most girls won't tell guys:If you don't have confidence in yourself, why should I?
No. I have confidence and I am maybe a 5. I have friends who are Adonis-like and they have no confidence. I have gorgeous female friends who have little confidence and Plain Jane friends that ooze confidence.
No. Confidence can make a person more attractive but no has nothing to do with just being attractive. Most people aren’t actually confident, they just appear to be.
And it does make them sexier
I've never been convinced about confidence. If a guy is very confident to ask me out he's either got a low opinion of me or an over exaggerated one of himself. Neither is particularly attractive.
I don't understand-- you're saying that if a guy is confident enough to actually ask you out, you think he has a *low* opinion of you rather than a high one?
No I'm referring to excessive confidence. Most guys are fairly confident but there's always a little doubt in them I'll say no. I'd rather date a guy who was 70% confident I'd say yes than one who was 100%
No confidence is most likely a value weight into your attraction to a person, but it is something you can tackle and discuss on it own. Because it's one of the least static parameters in attraction.
A man's confidence is to a woman what a woman's good looks are to a man.
No , it’s actually cocky behaviour , experience in dating. I am attractive than most guys but I am generally shy. I have seen guys way more unattractive with beautiful girls
Equally, a girl or guy can be attractive but insecure, and then they'll still be asked out.
Maybe not one-and-the-same, but certainly pretty closely tied together.
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