Have an opinion?
From experience, I say other. Why I say other? Because it is a multitude of problems that it comes on a list. Because the answer is so simple that it doesn’t just applies to men it applies to women. And let me say, all of the answers above while impactful are just EXCUSES. Forgive me, it’s going to be LONG if you people know me well, but what I have to say van change your life and relationships forever. No seriously. If I had millions of dollars I will put a bet on it that’s how confident I am about this. As I am a person who truly values relationships.Men lack confidence in women because most of their relationship pool are either family members or other men. And if their by themselves with no family, no friends, no mentorship of real manhood, its even WORSE. Thats right. They don’t know how to befriend the female sex. Friendship is lacking. Mutual friendship. Just ask any female on the planet. Your daughter, your baby sister in kindergarten, or sister in general, your aunt, a stranger. Men have a hard time getting intimate without actually thinking about sex or making something sexual. That’s a man problem now. So what does this really mean? It means this:This is NOT an experience problem! Men interact with women on a daily basis. So unless they live in some type of community that is cultish and they’re not allowed to speak with the opposite sex, this is simply personal issues. Which probably can stem from other issues to giving based on how the person is raised. But I will get there in a minute. When men choose to not befriend women this causes a major problem. It causes him to have unrealistic expectations about women, and make negative deductions about the female sex altogether. Which can also stem into hating any female even if it’s their own daughter. They consider females as Uncharted Territory the same way we women see as men is Uncharted Territory. But the major divide that a lot of people especially for the male community that like to point out is that men desire sex while women desire love. When in actuality there is some truth but also there is no truth to it either. It’s all based on priorities. This causes women to fear sex as a whole especially concerning men, and causes men to fear love from women as a whole. And possibly love all together. Society and humanity as a while has truly forgotten what love is. To prove I’m right I’ll get into a little experiment. As children, the last thing anybody would think about is sex, right? Unless you were like me and was exposed to adult matters everywhere, your innocent for the most part. Throw sex in the middle, now you're not innocent anymore. Romanic and Sexual Relationships such as marriage from what I gather when it comes in the matters of dating and courting SHOULD be a mutual friendship. Where sex should NOT be present. If sex were to be of interest, the couple with such passions should MARRY. Because as I always said, sex is a marriage and marriage is all about sex. Going back to this experiment. Were YOU thinking about sex very young towards a girl or female friend? As in younger than 11 years old? 3-10? If so, marriage talks should have been discussed and prepared for you. That’s what people did in every culture in ancient times. We’re not doing that anymore. We’re delaying adulthood and responsibilities with birth control and misinforming younger generations about marriage, dating and telling them to marry LATER. This is why there is so many problems for men especially. Men should be talking with women with friendly intent more often. If you were like me and it wasn’t, then why would you not also want that same friendship throughout the rest of your life? Which leads me to the next issue:2. Negative image of themselves and WOMEN came from false spread information from bitter and anti-religious.
At the same time, you have the overall religious community giving poor examples of what it really means for women and men to conduct themselves with and around each other both in private and in public. Why? Because of feminism, hyper-sexuality, as it was in ancient Rome, Egypt, Persia, Greece, etc, dominates the world over — Lawlessness and lack of sexual morality are greatly declining here in the USA ALONE, and other westernize countries and allies are equally suffering.Men are being taught to be sexually aggressive and women sexually repressive. Now when I talk about ‘repression’, I do not want comments about holding out the sex until marriage when one is a virgin being repressive. I will get to that afterward too. But the attitudes between married and unmarried people until it goes into marriage before there is NO MARRIAGE. Men no matter if their married or not are EXPECTED to be aggressive. Women are called and expected to be docile, unassuming and sexually pure. The problem with this image is that it damages everybody. It is not fair for men to be expected to never be a virgin while women MUST be a virgin. Healthy sexuality is remaining pure inside and outside both while as a virgin and even when you are sexually experienced. In other words, God’s design for human interaction sexually is purity in everything, and that includes heterosexual sexuality. This is why he condemns porn and masturbation and seeing ones nakedness before marriage. Because your ‘purity’ is jeopardized and causes problems sexually in the bedroom. When we have more than enough of this, over 70% of society NOW have this problem. We instill this into our children after it was instilled into the US, and were creating a dangerous demonic and destructive cycle.
Women now are embodying everything regarding sexuality: sexual aggressive, repression [if your already sexually active], obsessive and oppressive. Men are also falsely taught that they're sexually repressed as virgins as women are, and that is false. As a virgin, I can contest that there is no such thing for virgins because we never had sex. Repression is for the sexually active. You can’t repress something you never had. Libido doesn’t work that way and the body can care less if you desire sex or not. You simply don’t have to do it if that is not what YOU overall desire to do no matter why or how. That myth needs to end if we expect things to get healthy. Virgin shaming is another problem linked to this. No virgin says 'I never had sex in quite a while'. Libido for virgins mostly, change due to diet, stress, age, and environment. Occasionally poor perceptions about sex. But for nonvirgins, its everything, but mostly lacking healthy sex in their lives. Bodily needs are VERY different. Leading to #3.3. Selfish desires is another reason why men lack confidence! I have dealt with so many constantly arguing with me from what I hear is selfish sexual desires. Why? Because the law premits sexual consent from ages 13-18 but no marriage without parental consent under 18 years old. THAT is a PROBLEM. Many years ago before 13-year-olds were allowed to marry with permission, there were no such consent laws. Because it was expected that you got married before having sex, and if you didn't, you would be forced to marry her especially if she got pregnant, the man/boy [13-year-olds were MEN, not boys] probably got sued. And further back in time stoned to death. They didn't play. You either treated their daughter right, or that was it. Now, it is no longer like that for most 'men'. Now men are demonized no matter what they do. Everything is wrong with men. Women get similar treatment but harsher treatment is towards men as a whole. This is bad.
This also leads to my issue that Women get treated like sex toys. If men did what was done in the past, ask parents for permission, boundaries were set sexually, etc, and the intent was presently given, many men and women would not SUFFER. As a pastor and few guys have spoken out about, is that men today are deliberately trying to take daughters away from their parents to mold them into their sexual taste. Hence why they do NOT want to meet the parents. Parents can protect their daughters IF done rationally. There are too many wolves out here. And because men have lost their place at the home, he has to deal with a daughter's heartbreak and can't give her advice on how to deal with toxic men and wolves because what can he say or judge? He was a wolf himself. He banged girls and her mom's too. Shaming the other guys who whored his daughter would make him a hypocrite. This is how backward this has become.
4. Men have very low self-esteem, like girls, based on the status of his penis and whether or not he is involved or having sex. From my experience, it is horrible that not only I have to keep a heavy guard up around men, both shy and timid and aggressive and haughty all because they can't talk to me. I have met guys who feel entitled to have sex with me because I'm 'pretty' when all I ask is a friendship, and THEN see if it's possible to date. Yet they want to know why they have a problem with women and say we switch up often. I find this to only be true because men switch often. When men expected women to remain virgins until marriage, many women were on the bandwagon. Now that men are expecting sex before marriage, that leaves so many women confused and they chase men for commitment and a relationship by giving away free sex. Yet again, we women are the problem? Did I also forget to mention that men's self-esteem is so shot that if I try to be gentle and give a guy the platonic love he needs he either shuts down or get hostile? It's that toxic! I can't even smile at a guy without people assuming I want to have sex with/date him or something. Also toxic sociology.
I cannot even talk to a guy by the approach to start a friendship without even getting anybody the idea that I am trying to date him. Now if I say friendship, he thinks friendzone and denies friendship. This is a big no-no for men. This is why women and girls hate having male friends trying to date them and now have poor views of men too. Friendship is essential, especially platonic for everybody. Romantic friendships are wholesome and healthy. It should not be forsaken gentlemen. Friendships with the opposite sex, especially when healthy boasts CONFIDENCE. Most people with unhealthy friendships have toxic relationships. Its a given. To call women users because they value your attention, handiwork etc is disingenuous and hurtful. Toxic people loves to step in and hurt your chances at good relationships with the opposite sex. Yes, girls love to receive attention [as long as it's healthy], to be pampered [AS LONG AS ITS HEALTHY], to be seen as special especially through chivalry [AS LONG AS IT'S HEALTHY!!]. But what's not healthy when a woman feels entitled for wrong reasons, is vain and greedy and uses everybody. To assume all girls who ask for friendship only sees you as a friend is wrong! Men, you MUST communicate! Sacrificing your wants and needs for hers is the only way you will ever win a woman's heart let alone her hand. We are worth it as you are worth it. I do not understand how men lacking the confidence to talk to me is so difficult if all they have to do is be kind, be themselves, unique and come CORRECT. If men dumped the idea of getting sex out of their minds, they would have better relationships with women. This is why many men who don't seek out/chase sex often end up getting it eventually. Also, they keep going after women, when they should work out building connections with one woman and branch out. Build personal relationships and getting to know women will get a lot easier. Don't put the cart before the horse!
@btbc92 I hear what you are saying but men want a relationship friendship because we are made to procreate, very few men are interested in being your friend and not pursuing you for anything else. What your wanting is dam near impossible for me to comprehend. You get sex or you get a relationship. Friendship is friendzone, but mainly that's so much effort to get nothing out of it, your asking way too much of any guy
Actually that is where you get everything very much Twisted. Has nothing to do with you being make appropriate. But the fact that you choose to use it as an excuse to have such poor Behavior towards women as a whole. We are not made simply just to procreate. We are human beings with thoughts, emotions, and feelings are my own too. If she does not desire that, and you said you care about, then what is it really? Do you care about her and when she feels or do you care about getting what you want out of her? Have nothing to do with being near impossible is the fact that you choose not to do it. And when you choose not to do it that's what we cut you off altogether. There is no such thing as a friend zone. You develop as a friend and getting to know each other. You use that as a chance to see if there is compatibility with each other. Just because your friends doesn't mean you going to be compatible with everybody. That's not asking much for a guy. It's a simple matter of just doing it or don't. We're not supposed to be having sex before marriage in the first place. That's asking way too much for women. There is no you get sex will you get relationship. You form and build relationships with others from the ground up. If it's too hard for you then that simply means you don't need to be in a relationship with anybody until you actually learn how to properly form relationships with others. Because it's simply not hard for somebody like me who values relationships. Men who are not interested in being a friend are simply interested in sex. That's why women don't want anything to do with guys. Because they don't want to be used for sex in relationships. It doesn't matter if the desired is there or not. We want to be loved and treated with respect. There are so many women out there who what promise things that were never kept from Men. When you come with motives like that that's what makes women not trust men at all.
That's not a relationship friendship. A relationship friendship is where something a relationship friendship is where something is innocent in nature. Not provocative or erotic in nature. A woman should not have to be in a dating environment bearing that a guy is going to touch her inappropriately or trying to have sex with her when that's not what she's looking for. That's not what that's for. There's a good reason why traditional roles were set up. To protect the interests and the Investments of both the male and a female and their families. If your Investments and interest is not her Investments as interest then you're simply wasting time pursuing her.
Fearing*This is why instead of a woman picking her Suitor, the family pick suitors for her. That's why I missed the very old days of the early 1900s and earlier when men were taught to be chivalrous towards women. Who had good intentions and focused on building strong emotional bonds and had good standards.
If you feel that is that hard that means that you need to work on your character. There is a lot of selfishness you need to give up if you ever expect to have healthier attitudes towards women and people. You need to learn how to properly Court a woman.
you seem to have a lot of time on your hands thinking about these kinds of things, however, the question was 'why do men lack confidence with women.' would you please shorten your answer into a thesis statement so that I may properly understand your position on this issue.
If you have to ask me to Short in anything then that's why a lot of you men have problems with women. I simply answered the question. You lack confidence because you don't understand how a woman works and what a woman needs in her life. And that's the number one issue right here you not listening. The position on this issue is everything. There is nothing to shorten.
it seems to me you have a bitter attitude towards men, and me in particular, even though we have not met. I'll take your answer to really mean that, men lack confidence because they do not understand how a woman thinks and what she really needs in her life, as there is no way we could possibly know each other. I would say that is a very good answer and concur with your findings. perhaps you should ask yourself why you assumed my curiosity to argumentative. if confusion is the overall explanation to this issue then perhaps women learning to be more vocal and clear with their intentions, and men becoming more understanding to others...
however, your response troubles me greatly, perhaps with this in mind, a new perspective can be seen on your previous engagements with members of the opposite gender
See this is a major problem that I have with you people. I don't have a better attitude towards men. I left my bitterness long time ago. I don't find your curiosity be argumentative. It's something that's just very simple. The problem is even if a woman is vocal your intentions is very clear. As I had to tell another female user, men only approach women for sex. Not going to approach a woman out of friendship. And that is the problem. There are two different ideals regarding both sexes. And our ideals don't match because they don't come in concurrently as it used to be. It is a toxic environment when men feel entitled to premarital sex in women getting into sexual situations that they now regret and they can't be responsible for own personal decisions. But blame men for everything that they choose to do.
Bitter attitude towards men*Because what I wrote is the Pinnacle of issues that men do not want to hear. And that many women refuse to voice out because they don't want to be judged by Society. No matter what a woman talks about when she speaks about these things you want to call it bitter. And it's not bitterness.
If you see my response troubles you, then you need to really pay attention to what is being said and not try to current by asking a person to shorten it. Because no amount of shortening it as I said before is going to change anything. Problems with you people you just want to do whatever it is that you want and you don't really want to listen. Because it's based on actions not words.
Curve it by asking*
it is true, men do have the tendency to seek and experience sex if they havnt tried it or desire sexual gratification for themselves, as at times women do as well, and have no hindsight to see that they hurt the person they left behind. however that is not the way to see every person of that gender afterwards
assuming me to be a sex-crazed male who doesn't listen is doing just that.
Did I say that you were sex-crazed male. I'm sorry but that's basically your perception that you're Gathering From Me Out of offense and defensive attitude. If you're not waiting for marriage to have sex than sadly that's exactly what the issue is. As I said before if things was done as God's way we would not have this problem. I made no assumption. I simply told you that you're not really listening. And just by you making that Assumption of me alone shows and proves you're not listening. There is nothing wrong with having curiosity for sex. But that time and place for it is within a marriage. Not within a dating or courting relationship. You would know what was being said if you read even just the first paragraph of the original posting. Develop a friendship, when you have a courtship then decide if marriage is the place for you. Because sex is a marriage and marriage is all about having sex. And if you have sex with a person outside of marriage you're screwing up not only your life but you're screwing up that person's life too. That's the point that I am making. Where there is sexual immorality, there is trouble.
That's not the point. Nobody is trying to say that everybody sees a certain gender or certain way. It again boils down to intentions. If your intentions are not good and there is no rational and logical reason behind him and you're not being honest and authentic with what it is that you're seeking, you're going to cause problems in your relationship with others. I tell every guy that approaches me that if you are seeking for a sex before marriage that is not happening. I believe in young marriages as long as the person is of age, and that person is willing to stick to their vows. Relationship requires trust and stability. That's what women needs is simply a given it's not that hard to understand. It just baffles me that this is a constant reminder not just about communication but that this is what women needs and just sounds like to me that a lot of you are still not listening. Because many of you find what I got to say to be religious and prudish when it's actually truth.
Men of very unaware of the destructive patterns that happens when you choose to imprint on sexual encounters outside of marriage. This is why so many men are miserable sexually, have erectile dysfunctions, and can't even handled their relationships with their partners and wives. And this in turn leads to divorce. And caused these women to go wild and remain sexually unfaithful. The Bible is very clear about the consequences of these things and actions that people take is wickedness. As much as it hurts me is not my problem the others want to destroy himself sexually. But I'll be damned if somebody try to destroy me that way. I'm a virgin this long for a good reason. And that's me loving myself too much to just give myself to just anybody who missed handles others and themselves.
I'm trying to help you and understanding your reasoning, but your making it very difficult to do so. I bid you a good day, ma'am.
What are you trying to help me with? My standards are clear. And my stance is clear. If you can't understand my reasoning then maybe you need to read the Bible sir. Because my reasoning comes from the Lord, not my own.And it all boils down to what kind of women you men want. Ladies or whores? Because it's very clear from what I'm seeing you guys keep going after the ladder. And still seek a lady then get pissed when a lady gives you men too many chances and leaves, or she shuts you down because you we're too busy playing the field while you were younger.
I'm not making anything difficult. It's really not that hard to understand. If you feel that I'm making you out to be something that you're not then no offense but that's simply your problem. Because I made it very clear that I made no assumptions of you.
This is what I have experienced so far. Totally agreed. Men don't want to talk, but only want sex from women (well, me). I think maybe they get used to having free sex, assuming it's the norm, interacting with women with sexually inappropriate manners. They don't have to put any efforts to get to know a woman, just puking "I like you." and see who's dumb enough to buy it and give away her body right away. How possible a man saying that to a woman who he can't have a friendship with? It's purely physical. Men don't understand that mental connection matters. *By the way, can I have your answer as a reference, please? I'll post it for others to see, on a social media. You have everything I would like to say.
an excellent point, and that type of male behaviour shouldn't be rewarded and hopefully as they mature they will learn not to treat women with only lustful intentions. I think perhaps still these men should be given a second chance to become friends with the woman they covet, and if they can't ask respectfully then the relationship will end. I have plenty of friends that are girls but it seems that many women have this one size fits all attitude when it comes to men, and that's just unfair and incorrect.
@el_Te_de_la_RosaYes, you may! 😄
Thank you. Have great days. We'll meet good people from now on!
Anthony, what a fantastic question. This is very very good. Results will be interesting.I like all of the options you provided as factoring in to some degree, but I'm going to make an educated guess here and say that I feel perhaps the most driving factor is that the internet has created a digital border, so to speak, around people, and this has created a paradigm shift in communication. There are new social 'rules' being created every day, but, in essence, there is less actual human contact by which to gauge interest from others. Likes and snaps and swipes and follows (and downvotes and hatespeak)... they all count as something, but this new language lacks the depth and personalness that face to face interactions always have. We can no longer read body language and gestures and all sorts of signals like a micro smile or a fixed gaze or a blush of the face. We actually do need these to have a better understanding of each other. I believe it has created a generation (s) of shy, unsure singles, now wondering how to navigate the world of relationships. And if they try, and do not find what they're looking for, they become disheartened, sad, and unfortunately, sometimes bitter and resentful, which only exacerbates the divide. W'hy me?', 'What's wrong with me?'. Maybe nothing. Maybe it is this new world that has been created, and they do not yet know how to live in it.
Those are good points. People actually put the time and effort into meeting people a long time ago. You can now easily swipe on someone and change your mind in seconds and go back to watching Netflix. It's a vicious cycle for sure.
@coachTAnthony You're right.
Yes, it's very dehumanizing. It objectifies people, distances them, makes it easier to judge them harshly, and therefore easier to dismiss them, not accept them, treat them more as an object to be rated and quantified.It has been said on gag that there was a poll done on some dating site (I forget which one) where the females rated 80% of the men "below average", which is, of course, statistically/mathematically impossible. This is really sad and unfortunate, and shows a harsh critiquing of attractiveness. I don't know if similar polls have been done with men and what they would conclude, but I doubt the results would be thaaat much more satisfying to all. I believe the reason is simply the platforms on which dating mostly begins/occurs now, are in and of themselves structured to begin (stressing 'begin') with looks. But the larger the photo, the more emphasis on it, the less people ever get to any stage 2. Which also brings me back to 'the paradox of choice' - the seemingly endless stream of options available to all, which therefore creates less acceptance of any minor/could be overlooked in person if all else seemed appealing... flaws. And 'the paradox' is about the idea that an abundance of choice actually creates more stress, and decision fatigue, then if there were fewer choices available.
As an online dating coach I know that the online dating poll is very accurate. Women aren't judging men and their attractiveness they are judging their lack of attractive photos. Men could do much better with photo display but choose to put up shitty photos to be judged. So they got judged and now are complaining about it. Women expect a man to have their shit together and that includes a simple online dating profile and photos. They sent a message and Men didn't listen... they cried instead.
Ahhh very interesting. "Women aren't judging men and their attractiveness they are judging their lack of attractive photos. " Good point. We need to spread that information around - it could be valuable to men. Yes, I have observed that women tend to spend a lot of time taking way more photos, use filters, have friends critique and take the photos of them, whereas guys do much less of all that.
@coachTanthony Just one more comment from me, and I am done - I wanted to say thanks for the MHO, Anthony. I normally don't say anything about it, but I have to admit I am particularly proud that on such a long and important string, you chose my post as one to feature. I have never come across a question with (at this point) 216 commenters. Is that a record? It got extremely heated, but nevertheless, an important topic to bring up. And I'm somewhat content to see that of all your multiple choice options, the "Confused on what today's woman really wants in a man" was voted the highest. That is a reasonable issue to have, and one that can potentially be repaired. Culture seems to be in huge disarray at the moment, but perhaps the dust will settle in the future.
I always pick the best answers! Wink! And I think I’ve had over 600 commenters once before so... anyway thanks again for responding!
Ahhh. And what was that topic/q, may I ask? Link?
Not sure... probably about cheaters lol that always gets a ton of responses !
Ha! Yes I've noticed that's one thing people can unite on! (And yet, so many cheaters still. One must do the math...)
I preface this with the concept of "The 6 Basic Fears" that all fears fall into:1. Fear of Death 2. Fear of ill Health 3. Fear of Old Age 4. Fear of Poverty 5. Fear of Loss of Love 6 Fear of Criticism.For this one in particular at it's core falls into 6. Fear of criticism.Guys have low self esteem/poor self image and they see themselves getting rejected if they tried to talk to a girl, because in their mind they aren't good enough. So why subject themselves to the anguish of being rejected over and over. While, if they dropped the fear of criticism. They wouldn't be afraid to suck and face rejection only to eventually improve.I'd say today fear of criticism is the #1 fear of most today. Gary Vee talks about this all the time. That most people aren't doing what they want to do, because they care about the opinions of others too much. What their parents think, what their friends think, what their highschool classmates think at the upcoming reunion. Whoooever it may be. At the end of the day it's fear of criticism.If most people are honest with themselves they would likely find the same for themselves. In a lot of ways I don't care about other peoples opinion, but in other ways I really do care about peoples opinion and that little bit manifests as a fear of criticism which stops me from doing certain things that I would otherwise do. Same is true for every guy who isn't currently pursuing women, when they want to. Even guys who are MGTOW. They're in the Fear of Criticism and Fear of Loss of Love in my opinion. They don't want to be in love and lose it. They don't think they could hold onto someone they love, that a woman would leave them, cheat on them or that another guy would take her from him and that fear is enough to stop them. While a lot of them just sucked with women to begin with and were afraid of rejection, so much so they developed resentment and now they are MGTOW. In a sad way there's more hope for an angry MGTOW guy, than a introverted guy who has zero passion and just isn't pursuing women.Because at least in the case of MGTOW they are passionately going down a life path, which is a positive trait. They're not masking impotence, with the lie of not wanting women. They just say they've given up. While a lot of guys who don't have a dating life will just say it's because they don't want it, when they're really just impotent in the matter. I don't use impotent in the sexual sense. Just saying incapable.
Honestly I gave up on even trying when I was 16. I'm 36 by the way. I was bullied often at school at around home during all of middle school and bits of high school. I tried being friendly and social but after that I kept to myself after that. 25 years I grew obese and very wary of any person I had to interact with it got so bad that while I had isolated myself in world of warcraft for a good 10 years, for the majority of that I tried avoiding talking to anyone, even in game. The isolation was bad that even after recovering at age 27 or so and losing the weight, there is still a lit of social cues I do not catch or sometimes not understand, and doing things for sake of socializing is near impossible for me. It sucks being at the house but I can't interact with most people even if I am doing the same things I like with them simply because I cannot relate to anyone. No matter who I try to talk with it's like something is blocking me from making any kind of connnection, even platonically. Like I have to stay isolated, that I don't deserve to be with anyone, it sucks.
What do you think it is that is blocking you from such a connection?
A very interesting story, @bimmy5000! It is sad you had a tough time at school and afterwards. Despite me being the opposite of you at school and afterwards, in the end I experience a similar problem. I have never been bullied possibly due to my sheer size as I was bigger and physically stronger than any bully at school, I am good-looking, and I totally ignored any form of typical teenager competition/dominance challenges at school which often lead to unnecessary violence (fights) as one side does not knlw how to lose. However, I also find it difficult to establish close friendships as I do not relate to people easily, and my relationships are rare as I seem to "miss"/not notice any signals sent by the opposite sex unless they are rather direct in their approach which probably leads them to think I am not interested. I do not seem to have any disorders as I've been checked by various psychologists and neurologists. So yeah, no idea why it is happening, but I wish it were different...
I’ve lived the same life as you my friend. I understand and feel your pain!I’ve been working on it since I was 13. I’m 33 now and only recently starting to understand how to be around people.I’m out of the house now and the app is trash. So I can’t type a nice response. But when I get home if you want I could try and help you out. I’ve come a long way personally. If you wanna tell me more about how you feel and experience people, and when I get home I could try to help you out. I feel your pain. You deserve to be loved by people too!
CoachTanthony for me I'm not sure, it's like the fight or flight is always in effect and it's always choosing flight. Other times it might not be but if I'm talking g to someone for a bit it's like I'm already thinking of excuses to go cause I'm already exhausted talking to them. Like we like all the same things but there's no click. If it's a group it gets a it easier as I am not center of attention but because of that I'm an absolute wall flower most of the time. I just can't connect. Last person I really was comfortable hanging with was a high school buddy, but killed himself in 2006. No one else since.
You are already of thinking of excuses to go. You are already thinking of excuses to go. You are already thinking of excuses to go. These are not excuses my friend. These are self preservation of a deeper fear... once you figure out what that is.. you will be free but until you do it means nothing. I know because I have been there.
I think it's because women want to manipulate male thinking with their proclamations of having "high standards" which are actually superficial standards that have nothing to do with their values or soulful intelligence as a human being. And they also want to bury men into the ground by telling them everything they think is wrong with guys. Then on top of it there's all the women who are into badasses, want to justify it, be showy about it, and bury men in the ground more by trying to tell them if you wanna get a date or get sex then that's the kind of guy you have to be.Basically - and as I've often talked about on GaG - women enjoy that men are sad about these things, and they like that it bothers guys that they feel like they have any kinds of disadvantages in getting women. They narcissisticly enjoy this because they like how it manipulates guys and gives them as women a sense of some kind of control over the sex and dating field.For me personally, I exited a bad relationship some time ago, but I still do flirt and fool with women, and if I'm interested enough then I'll make the move to go further, however I do have to say that as I get older and change more as a man and as a person, fewer and fewer women are my types. It's harder for me to date simply because I have not yet found the best woman for me. Many women of today do not have very attractive personalities or minds for me, even when they are physically attractive.
@CoachTanthony And what's your idea?
Lack of strong male role models (father figures) growing up, who both exhibited and taught confidence.And that goes back to the MASSIVE and RAPID changes in society following WWII which includes Feminism and the huge drop-off in marriage (and the huge increase in divorce) that resulted from the combination of Feminism, reproductive medicine (BC pill), and women working outside the home. The results are that less than 25% of all children in the US make it to 18 with married parents today, compared to around 80% in the 60s.
Perception. Everyone thinks that people can all be lumped together by some similar characteristics about the opposite sex and make assumptions based on that. It's not that simple. People are more than generalizations.
I agree. The generalization is too broad. You have to narrow it down.
Let me clarify that I actually mean this for both men and women.
No I meant like, generalizing by race/nationalityBLACK MenMEXICAN Men
And my favorite, Pervert INDIAN men
I didn't think she was talking about race. But I could be wrong.
@Jamie05rhs She wasn't I'm teaching her how to properly generalize people
LOL I just meant that the question was about MEN lacking confidence but it applies both ways. Or all says, if you want to include race and other factors
OH...So you think men EVERYWHERE lack a confidence?Men have been pussified.BUT... whatever confidence they once had must've transferred over to me. :p
@SydneySentinel I think I'm with you on this, I purposely only ask questions where I want to learn about the individual, I never bump into someone in real life and expect them to answer for their race, their gender, their sexuality, their age etc but on here questions are asked expecting them to answer for a whole stereotype. I just want to learn about each individual, I think generally people are fascinating and most have their own story to tell, so why generalise.
No. I think people have reservations about wanting to date or have a relationship in general.Glad to know you're a confident man, @ZeussLightningBolt.
@AndrewMG Same!! Although I will be the first to admit that I've been guilty of generalizing before.
I wasn't always this confident, Ms. RayI used to run FROM hot girlsNow I run TO hot girls
@SydneySentinel Haven't we all mate! lol
Mothers are not raising strong sons!
That is for damn sure!
Mothers don't want strong sons. They want obedient sons.
They may want their sons to be successful businessmen, so that gold diggers can leech off from them /pessimism off
I was at a meetup recently and there were 2 men and like 7 women. One woman was talking about going to this special dating meetup where they discuss a famous female dating coach. One of the things they talked about seeing quite a few men at the same time (i'm sure not sleeping with all of them) and to play the lean back.I said that's the problem all the game playing. Why not just say I like you do you like me? Be done with the game playing. No offense taken if the other person says no. She said all that game playing was too much. I, also, said too many female dating coaches are telling women not to take the lead. And the other woman said but do men really want women to take the lead. One of the guys said Fuck yes at least give us a clue. Or something like that. I think that men start to wonder how women are going to respond to their advances if they have a series of misreads or over reactions from women then it can start to erode on a man's self confidence. Some men I've talked to say they can't be as nice as they used to because they will get used. They set up clear boundaries now.
Who was the so called famous female dating coach? Ill be the judge LOL.
Myself and the other woman I was talking to basically figure we'll just be ourselves and see what happens.
Do you know the name of the famous female dating coach?
I don't remember the name. She wrote a book and I think her first name is Katrina or something. the woman who was telling the story didn't agree with the method she had just been invited by someone else to go listen.
Okay cool... there are many great coaches out there. Just curious on who she was referring too.
I dont understand why someone considers herself a dating coach? Have they been very successful in picking up men?
@Freezer110 who knows. Most of the dating coaches for my age just basically tell women to give into the fact the men our age are more traditional and we just have to live with it.
Damn I'd love it if the woman took charge at times. No flipping guessing or mind games, just right into whatever it is she wanted with no hints or vague ideas.
I don't guy want girl take the lead. Like calling for check or telling how horny she is. If she dateable guy can tell easy
@bimmy5000 I only know of maybe one or two male dating coaches for women who advocate that. One is Mark Rosenfeld. I think as we women age most of us tire of wasting time. I'm wondering if it's only men under 40 who want women to lead part of the time or at least show they are interested. I guess I hear stories mostly from younger men since those are the guys who show up to the interest meetups I attend. I'm not sure if men my age would want the same thing.
What the hell is a "lean back", if I may ask?
That dating coach you mentioned doesn't sound good.I watch a lot of reality TV (real stuff, not scripted), which all focus around relationships (all types of relationships). I can tell you that of the dating coaches, and I've seen a ton, they are not giving any outrageous or different or new or worse advice in 2019. They are giving the same advice and 'rules' I have always heard. Someone writing a book has to come up with something new, some catchphrase, some new concept that will be 'the hook'. But in the real world, under normal conditions, people still want (basically) the same things - be nice, be cool, show interest if there is any, don't play games, meet me half way, and be honest about your intentions. (Except for all the people who just wanna f**** nowadays - wth is up with that. No wonder STD's are rampant.) Let's face it, half the dating population doesn't do all of these things (0+0 doesn't equal 2). And people are confused why it's not working out for them? Just go back to basics, people. It's not rocket science. Did you forget how to be a nice human... and by the way if it's not glaringly obivous by now, you have to also put your heart out there a little too, both sexes. Both sexes.
@AmandaYVR 27% of all new HIV cases are 50+ adults. I guess people aren't wearing condoms or asking for lab tests. I've talked to women around my age and they seem a bit clueless about being careful.
@anonymous Yikes! Put a raincoat on it.
@Jamie05rhs show interest then back off a bit. I guess it is like dangling a carrot to see if the man pursues. Seems like a lot of wasted energy.
There's a lot to be said for all the choices to have an effect. We know from an endocrinological standpoint that there is a reduction of testosterone and an increase of estrogen in all humans. That comes from the pseudo-estrogens used to fatten 'food animals' and the proliferation of soy like products that also contain pseudo-estrogens. The sperm count of the American Male is now about 50% of what it was when I sprouted pubic hair, and we were much more masculine back then, in my memory. (I used "sperm count range over last 50 years" in Google to find info.)In addition, we tend to medicate and 'treat' boys into feeling less traditionally masculine in schools and in behavioral modification to make boys more calm, more like girls, who are easier to control in the classroom and on the playground. As a result, many think that boy-ness is trained and medicated out of boys. Given that the role models in school and society these days are girls, that girls are given preference in many programs such as STEM classes recruitment, the condemnation of male privilege, and all the women's rights stuff we learn, it's no wonder in my mind that many if not most boys grow up feeling inadequate, incompetent, and like they are second-class citizens.
I'd say all of the above and then some.But is it really a lack of confidence, or is it more about choice? Choice as in they no longer can be bothered due to the above reasons and see that it's not really worth the hassle. Also consider that divorces have become so commonplace over the last 2-3 generations, including my own parents divorcing, as well as a number of aunts and uncles over the years... And many I know from my generation who've divorced, it paints a picture of one's odds of actually having a successful long term relationship. Im married, got a kid and all and at present there are no signs of a divorce on its way, but for my child, I'm not going to push them when they grow up to get into a relationship, marry and have kids so I cna have grand kids or anything like that. If they don't want a relationship and decide to stay single and not have a family, I wouldn't be surprised and I also wouldn't care. Once they're an adult, It's their life.With all the crap going on today, perhaps they would be better off looking out for number one. They can contribute to society in many other ways beyond settling down and popping out more human spawns.
DO we lack confidence? Hard to generalize half the population, really.Personally? Not having a date/hookup/whatever for the past, oh, 8 years...Really out of shape lately now but when I take care of myself I'll often hear folks say something along the lines of me being very good looking (I don't see it honestly.)... College Grad, Eagle Scout, used to have a great social life... People often express confusion like how are you still single? - If you find out, lemmie know. I must be f*cking nuts or something. Last dozen or so times I've asked someone out (I wish I were exaggerating)- No go- More often than not they'll say yeah I'm down- Then poof, silence.My best guess- I just now finished school and am getting a career going- Essentially crawling out of a giant hole I've been stuck in... I've been super depressed/anti-social/unhappy which eventually led to me going back home to live with the folks... Which has sent me into a kind of self perpetuating feedback loop... As far as I can tell that's pretty much an immediate disqualifier for almost everyone.
Because roles are being switched. People think that letting a man be a man is "toxic masculinity" when it is not. Women are moving away from the man and act like they do not need their man. Women should show men that they are appreciated and allow them to take the lead without trying to push men down. Yeah, we always hear about how some men can be abusive or some men aren't present in the house but we never talk about the woman's part in some of this. I have seen some women just treat their man so wrong or try to control everything and then expect that man to stay with them. And then when the guy does try to be in control, the woman just diminishes any confidence he does have and it makes him effeminate. But the man is supposed to be the head of the woman... not the other way around. If women showed more appreciation for their men then they would be more confident. If men showed more love and respect for their women then they would feel more secure and none of this would happen in the first place.
If men had the confidence to leave toxic women then that would solve it too.
The biggest confidence killer has been internet dating. Men were led to believe all they had to do was sign up and thousands of hot women were there for the choosing. The reality was they got rejected by countless women and thats got to shatter anyones confidence. To give a real example a friends just got a date with a guy 50 miles away who's extremely good looking and successful. There's no way most the local guys could even compete. Men now know they've got competition from all over not just the local neighbourhood.
Well I think maybe you are saying Men were led to believe they could do online dating and play outside of their league. And that just don't happen.
Girls also have competition because of the internet and because travel is easier than it was in the past. Girls have competition from all around the world because some men will only date foreign girls. Most people will date people within their own country but more guys are choosing international dating or travel to meet a foreign girl.
Women reject. It's part of the game for any (mostly) monogamistic (biologically evolved) primate. Yes, we screw around like Bonobos, but the human biological model is monogamy. Our offspring are too resource-intense for us to survive as a species any other way (with a fringe of non-compliers). That means females actually do the mate selecting, so they biologically are very picky. Successful males just move on from rejection to rejection until they find a female that's loopy enough at that particular moment to not reject him. Then it's monkey sex, offspring, repeat the cycle.Industrialization and effective birth control screwed all that up totally, but the biological imperatives still exist, so women are hardwired to be picky. Unfortunately, many men somehow lost the hard wiring to just not let it get to them.
"Play outside their league". My wife is TOTALLY outside my league, dude! TOTALLY. There are times when it completely pisses her off, then there are the times when she realizes that the guys who are in her league wouldn't bother doing the things for her that I love to do.
That's actually kind of true
@ZeussLightningBolt, she sometimes tells her whiny, physically hot, LONELY female friends that they want to go for nerds, total geeky nerds. They're the men who will end up worshiping the hot girl forever, even when she gets old and not hot. Do they listen to her? No. Are they still single and miserable? Yes.
Love the phrase playing outside their leaque. Gotta use it some time.
That reminds me, my friend and I met a girl in a dota game few years ago, she used voice chat during the game, the moment he identified she was a girl he proceeded to capslock flame her all game and suicide to the enemy base to prove his devotion to her. Somehow it worked and they added each other. A month later he was on the plane from the UK to Romania to meet her. 4 months later they went to Fiji together for 2 weeks. 6 months later she moved to England, got a job and they have been living together for a few years now. They were married last week. How can her local guys ever compete 🤔
@IlyaTheImpaler, by not being pussies?
@purplepoppy On the other hand, you need to ask yourself why did he need to expand his search to 50 miles? I bet he's not doing nearly as well as you think he is in his local area either. And 'hot' is completely subjective. I've tested this many times. I'm sure of it now.
Whatever I have that isn't nailed down or on fire, is so easily snatched away. Advice: never fall in love with a Chinese woman. The dickheads in Beijing will get to her, and ban communication. They'll strip her away from you out of spite, and leave you feeling empty, loving a ghost, convinced nothing can ever truly replace what you lost.But the MeToo thing also sucked. Thousands of buffoons having their buffoonery validated for no valid reason whatsoever, deciding that any man approaching them who didn't fit into some arbitrary category of hers, by virtue of being unique, must be a rapist. And deciding that sending a mob after him was justified, even if he asked a question that wasn't flirtatious and had nothing to do with sex. Because she somehow can't handle him on her own like a mature adult. The woman wasn't the worst part. It was the f*kheads on her side ganging up on me, assigning automatic guilt, and then even when I'm proven right, told I cannot seek any recourse and have no right to be angry over the injustice inflicted on me. They can endanger my very life over BS, and I'm not even allowed to raise my voice? That's modern university life.
I think it's all of the above. Although I agree with the MGTOW movement somewhat, it's a fact that men are supposed to be the protectors and women are supposed to be the nurterers. We are naturally physically stronger (in general) and women are the ones that give birth. Men are mostly attracted to nurterers. Not often will you find a guy that finds women with very muscular features attractive. Women however, generally like a muscular guy. I haven't been up to date with the #MeToo movement, but I haven't heard people mention it as much recently, however it does play a part in mens fear. Women definitely don't make it completely clear what they want in a man. They say one thing, but seem to want the opposite and vice versa most of the time. If you've found a girl that is blunt with how she feels, you've found a unicorn. Lower testererone levels may actually be a result of how different society is now in comparison to back in the day. It definitely affects the way we think and act. It's just chemistry. Self esteem will always play a part in asking women out and too much rejection affects self esteem.
Voted F because that is what I observe a lot and unfortunately for some of them, I help create this feeling since I have to reject a number of those guys too.I dislike very much to be approached, knowing that the ultima ratio of an approach is usually to get intimate with the girl. That is the basics of dating. Since I am not into dating, I am obliged to tell them off when they hit on me or try, their clumsy way, to flirt. What else should I do.I try at first to be diplomatic an nice but a very large number of them have a serious blockage when it comes to the understanding of the word "no" or the sentence "not interested, thank you".Honestly, I don't know what they teach them in school or college, but those words seem unknown to a very large number of guys.And what should not happen in the first place happens. I get aggressive and tell them off a less diplomatic way. That sure helps them lose their confidence.If only they could understand those simple words. It would make everyone's life so much easier.
Sorry, but being nice while rejecting them will give them a hint that you are just playing around or sh*t testing them, so they will keep trying to because they think its just a game you are pulling. You have females to blame for this because of some like that type of thing.
@Ljd213 I am always in favor of a soft approach first because there are enough people that start immediately by being rude or impolite.If I tell them off in an improper way, I will also be labeled as cold bitch and just add me to the long list of those that do deserve that adjective and name.But perhaps you are right, I should start first being rude and see how the message is understood.
I am not saying being rude at an instant. You'll look crazy and like a red flag towards other people except for your friends. I rather say to walk away if they can't understand the word "no" in a nice way.
@Ljd213 Walk away is nice. If you are in a constricted or closed room, they sooner or later will be obnoxious again. When you are outside, that is the best action of course
I think the only way would be to not wear attractive clothes. And I don't know why girls don't get this point. Flies will always jump on exposed honey!
Doesn't matter if a woman wears attractive clothing though, a lot of guys just have this odd mentality to just go for it until it becomes a problem. Like the word no isn't a statement or a request but a challenge and can be real sore losers should they perceive they are losing or have lost.
@alex_x988 You have no idea to what extend I go to be left alone. No make-up, don't wash my hair and put on baggy clothes.But when hormones call, I guess anything is good enough ;-)
Nope that way you must be getting significantly lesser attention honey😏
@alex_x988 Thanks for your input.But that is exactly what I want. I want NO attention.
Men will be men baby 😏
@alex_x988 Unfortunately I agree with you and I experience it every day.
Even here on gag someone wants you 😉. Life's so easy for women 😪
Politicians , law enforcement , social programs , the legal system , movies and women have this belief that being a man is bad , being a man is criminal , being a man is socially , legally and political unexpectable. Women don't want men to be men. They want us to be a man physical nut not a man emotional or a man the way we think.We are in a age where a woman can make false claims of rape , sexual harassment , drug abuse , neglect , robbery and a man will be arrested on the spot.It's dangerous to be a man.We are expected to be something other than a man.There's this belief that men are only good for work , money , making babies , paying child support , spousal support , jail and prison.This view is expressed by the news and entertainment media see the show cops and dog the bounty Hunter , politicians , police , judges , social workers , DHS CPS that's child protective services. And I've heard many women voice this Wich is why I'm single and have no kids.It's no wonder a man's confidence is going down.There's no place for men we are told how to think and act in ways that are not traditional male values or roles.
I'm going on pure speculation, because I've never lacked for confidence. I may have struck out GLORIOUSLY, but I've never lacked the confidence to try. I would guess it's some sort of nutsy social conditioning that has gone entirely over my head, possibly because I'm autistic. I don't get a lot of the stupid "rules" that tell me that I just shouldn't even try things, and when I hear of them, I just dismiss them. I mean, HELL! One of those rules is that there couldn't be any way I could succeed with women because I'm joust all "wrong". I'm autistic, I don't have money, I've got no end of geeky interests. I hate dance clubs and loud music. I was born reciting Dad Jokes. My fashion sense is "Stripes and plaids are FUN together, especially with a cowboy hat!"But I've never lacked confidence with women. I don't care if I strike out or not. What the hell? I'll be dead by 500 years from now, anyway.
Too much logic dude... stop making so much sense. Ha
Advice for men who can't handle not scoring:Keep score, actual score, of your strikeouts.Do play-by-play running commentary when you do strike out.Whenever you strike out, do an improv performance of KC and the Sunshine Band's "Boogie Man", while dancing away.If you strike out all night long, cheer and shout "PERFECT SCORE!".If you get hit with a retort that is really SHARP, respond with "SICK BURN!" and congratulate her.
I'm terrified of women because I was bullied by them for a long while. You can easily shrug off what guys do, but girls are so incredibly harmful. Spreading false rumours about me, asking me out as a joke or making fun of me out loud.I know 99% of girls aren't like that, but it really hinders me from talking to girls in the first place, even online. I never know if I am welcome or not. It's a shame, I tend to have quite a lot of stuff in common with them.This is a very personal issue though ^
Things like this can happen for sure!
Growing up with a toxic mother is in a similar realm.
I'm sorry. I accidentally touched dislike. And I'm sorry for what happened to you. Wish you wouldn't meet that kind of person again. Fight!! 😤 Keep improving yourself physically and mentally.
I think they think to much into it. They don't they have the looks, panic over rejection, and a little of they don't know what a woman wants. Women are all very unique in what they want in a man so what they are use to might not be what that certain women wants and that can lead to doubt.I don't see how the Metoo movement would be a reason men don't have confidence unless he plans on sexual harassing her, or raping her the metoo movement shouldn't be some thing that would take away his confidence. And that's not how testosterone and estrogen work...
and we all know exactly what you all want and that is why so many of us are avoiding you all at all cost
@CasaNorba I feel a bit personally attacked with the word you. Lol.
you did sounded like you were speaking on behalf of all women out there
@CasaNorba I know. I was lol most.
Confused as to why you ask that? Women are all TOTALLY DIFFERENT! Once you know that, you start each relationship with a clean slate, and she is wanting to know how much you care, by how fast you learn her habits, her desires, and food preferences!! Most guys assume that the current girlfriend is the SAME as the past!! That's where they FCK UP!!! She LOVES being SPECIAL, and UNIQUE, and even if you had past 'bitches', she loves the attention you are giving her NOW, and forgetting about 'them'!NEVER, EVER, say "my last girlfriend loved this..."!! In bed, when she let's you, she is wanting to know if you just do the 'same old thing' like with past GFs, or if you take the time to get to know what she likes, and make one night, just for her, and discovering all the things she loves, even some of the 'kink'!! :)
In a way I said OTHER to say maybe all above, I don't think the reasons really change maybe old ones lessen class structures and new ones come along MGTOW, #METOO I don't know but I think you could plonk down in any year and roughly the same dynamics are happening. We are all insecure about something and in your mind yours is the worst. You think Beefy McBeefcake or Richy McRich has it so much better but has you get older you sit back and reflect, (I don't have the numbers) but a good majority (just say 85%) still manage to have a relationship so a good proportion of the teen boys who worried about ever getting somebody had nothing to worry about.
Social climate that does not allow flirting in the places they meet women, its extremely risky to flirt at the workplace for example which tends to be a place both genders come together. More isolation between the gender with less interaction. Because we life in separate worlds at times it can make you wonder what to even talk about because she is probably not into what you are into making ice breaking very hard. And of course the super harsh reactions when you do try. It makes dating terrifying for the more geeky guys like me.
I think another big reason is the poor image of women these days. A lot of men tend to think that most women are spending their 20s being a total slut on Tinder and only get boyfriends for his money but cheats on him with Chads and Tyrones and trades up when she gets a better deal, and once she's 30 and her looks start to fade away and is a single mother she then wants a husband even though she spent her prime getting gang banged and now her husband has to deal with the aftermath of all that.I don't think women are like that, it's just the image that women have due to feminism, MGTOW, slutty female celebrities, etc.
@btbc92 I can't read all of this, you have unrealistic expectations, and I know that's not what you want to hear but most guys even ones who love women ain't reading all this, do you know what kind of attention span men have? These aren't fairy tales this is real life. This is a lot of time and I have anxiety just looking at the paragraphs. I can't read these even if there was time because you are a very deep thinker. And I'm sure if you wait long enough you will find a guy who can stand that. I on the other hand only have 50 years left so by then il be dead but good luck
Unrealistic expectations? Do you not even understand the term unrealistic expectation. Of course these guys aren't going to read all of this because they don't care! It has nothing to do about attention span men have. I know perfectly well what an attention span man has it's up to him to decide how much of he really wants something that he goes get it. We know this is real life nobody told him about fairy tales and all this other nonsense. It's about the what you choose to do. You are an adult and you got to make adult choices. if you can figure this out within a year and you and this person have the standards, the morals, the principles, the faith, belief, religion, and anything else that aligns then you don't wait anymore if that's what both you and this person desire. It's all about how badly you really want to form a relationship with this person. And for some people it takes time. Nobody's saying for you to wait 10 years to figure this out. That's why you think about these things while you're children and not allow idiotic adults try to tell you that you're too young to think about these things. You are never too young to learn and to grow and mature into the type of person you want to be as an adult. Now wait until you're 18 or 21 years old to figure these things out and then you still don't know what you want. I knew as a child what kind of person I needed and wanted in a man. What I'm realizing it a lot of you men do not want to do what's right by a woman and you get pissed when a woman says what she says. And then you see men get jealous when she starts dating and having sex and marrying or even having kids with that other person.
So come on. This is not unrealistic standards I'm speaking about. Unrealistic standards is when a woman wants a blonde hair blue-eyed person or once a man of a specific stature or physical race. That's unrealistic standards. What I have and what you're trying to say is that I have high standards. And you got that daggone going for real I have high standards. I only believe in being with one person and with one person that got approved is who you stick with for the rest of your life. The problem with you people, you keep hopping back and forth with different people and you still don't know what you want. If you only you knew the kind of damage you're doing to yourself and others.
You men act just like unwise women who do dumb stuff and make us sane women go insane.
The only reason why you are suffering as men because you make too many freaking complaints about what you got to do as men. How long do you think women are going to tolerate that? Plenty of times I had said I would have been married as young as 18 but these guys did not want what I wanted and needed. They did not want to get married young. They did not want to wait until marriage to have sex. They did not want to get married at least within a year or two of dating. So that is not my fault. It was I that I had premarital sex with them and chose to shack up with them before marriage or no marriage at all, or else they was not going to give me commitment. So please don't give me that BS.
Either I had premarital sex*I got shut down for having Godly principles. Not for having unrealistic expectations. You men can meet those expectations if you do whatever it is you got to do for yourself. But you don't. And you don't want to. It's all about choice in this life. I respect men who say their dogs, then men who say they want to do right by women but act like cowards. And still can't even keep not one woman in their life. That's sad.
And the point out your hypocrisy, if you say you're not wasting time then where's your wife? If you don't know how to keep a person, then you just simply wasting your time trying to get one. One thing I refuse to do is to date will be with somebody I am not compatible with. Understand the meaning of the terminology before throwing it out there.
@btbc92 sex is not a reward. You really want a guy to wait til he marries you to determine you suck at something as important as sex? You might also not sex but that is a huge gamble because once your married and find that out you got to live with it or divorce (a headache) their is so many options these days that nobody is going to take that gamble, I would not take that gamble even if I loved a woman although keep in mind I'm divorced already but my wife never denied me anything related to sex I asked or wanted and we had sex hundreds of times before marriage so that is the opposite of you but I'd never have married her a virgin
@btbc92 you talk too much. Good luck with your man hunt but you talk so much that it stresses me out and this is just here I can't even imagine you in real life I might eat a revolver ugh
Excuse me!! Since when has sex became a competition! First of all you don't go ahead and get married for you to get a divorce. If you went ahead and got a divorce then you're the one that stupid. That's why you have problems with your marriage because you chose to do that crap before you got married. You're the idiot and you're the one that destroyed your marriage. You should have married her a virgin otherwise you would have been able to keep your wife. You did not love your wife. Hate to say it but that's not my problem you don't cherish your wife over sex.
I'm not on no Manhunt. Because men like you disgust me enough. Has nothing to do about me talkin so much. You just simply don't care! That's why you're divorced. I think God I'm celibate. I rather die alone and die a virgin then going to be stuck with you people. Can't even hold a marriage you got nerve to lecture me. No offense buddy but that's why you have no marriage and that's why you don't have no wife.
@btbc92 And before you let your shpeal out I filed for divorce in 2017 because I married her at 18 and she was too young to get married, I'm not mad because now I can fuck anyone I want again:)
Sorry, but sex is a reward in marriage, and it's a reward you gladly share with your spouse.
She was a virgin I just didn't wait until after we were married to fuck her like your wanting 😂
That's a load of BS! Stop using age as an excuse budding. You are never too old or young to be married. Neither you or her can handle marriage.
@btvc92 no one will ever marry someone who thinks sex is a reward, your very close minded I would commit suicide if you were my wife because it would be torture to deal with that mentality
You are utterly disgusting as a human being! Now you ruined her life because you couldn't wait anymore. Can you never love that woman. You never loved anybody. And anyone talked about how you can screw anybody. Then you should have never got married to her. You should have never touched her. You should allow her to find somebody who is going to love her and cherish her. Because you had no desire and cherishing anybody. You just wanted to get your penis served. I feel sorry for her she got involved and married a fraud. You literally are a Thief. I am literally hurt for that woman all because you wanted to turn her into your whore.
You know I would be torture because you don't know how to love. You probably don't even know how to have sex properly! What you don't. If that was not a reward, people wouldn't be getting married for centuries, let alone be having children or even bother to be touching the opposite sex in first place. That just goes to show how much of a loser you really are.
Has nothing to do what you wanted to commit suicide. You had no business being mad in the first place. And first of all you already married to her because the moment you stuck your penis into her you already made her your wife illegally. So there would have been no backing out from that.
How old are you? @ btbc92
Wow I didn't turn her into a whore she was showing unfaithful tendencies so I divorced her
I would never treat my husband if I had got married way how you treated your ex wife. I can't even call her your wife because she deserve better. I pray she's with somebody who does do better than you. And how old do you think I am I'm 27 years old soon be 28. I don't see how my age have anything to do with it. You are the age that you are and you still act like you're a freaking horny teenager. Really pathetic.
No I said suicide if I was YOUR husband @btbc92
How do you think she showed Unfaithful Tendencies, because you already screwed her before marriage you dumb dumb? She learned it from you through sex. You don't see how much premarital sex really damages a woman. And first of all, you decide to have sex with her before marriage she is a harlot at that point. So yes you did.
And you wish you could have me @btbc92 your most definitely going to want your first experience to be a much smaller dick than mine or your first sexual experience will end in the ER, you could not handle my dick, although maybe your mouth could to shut you up @btbc92 😃
I know what you said about that. That's not my problems that's the way how you feel because that's how you always felt. That's why you should have been loose from the beginning and you should have never been involved with her.
First of all I want you. Your a hoe. You don't see how much disgusting how much of a pervert you really are. Posting that drivel on here. I can even constitute what you're doing as sexual harassment you pig! I don't wish I can have somebody like you. You too dirty for me.
I don't want you*
@btbc92 she wanted to have sex not me, so you don't even know what your talking about, she insisted and she was already freakier than I imagined, what's funny is how it's always all the man's fault and you and other woman are so innocent, you crack me up but I'm also thankful you ain't my broad. Like I said, whoever marries you is getting punished for whatever they have done in life
You just called me a 🐖
And I don't treat men based on who they are sexually! I treat them as people and I treat them how they desire to be treated! I care more about the heart then somebody so-called size! What matters is that I love them for their spirit. You care so much about a performance get a hoe.
Ok I will
Thanks for the permission, you know at first @btbc92 I thought you were just a talk too much psycho femenist but now that you gave me permission to have a ho I think your alright @btbc92 🤣
It don't matter what she wanted! You knew better. And now you got what you got. And I think I already made it clear before then nobody has to worry about that because I'm not interested in getting married at all! There is something seriously wrong with you people. And yes I did call you a pig because you really are. And if you got a call a woman a broad that's how disgusting you really are as a person. Nobody ever said it had nothing to do with being a man's fault all the time. And no no woman is all innocent either. But you still knew. Therefore you are still just as guilty. Just as she is guilty for choosing to be naive and ignorant of the choices she choose to make.
You don't need my permission. You are a grown ass man you need to be responsible your own decisions. And first of all I'm not no feminist. You can thank them for the way how women are behaving you getting what you're getting. Because if it wasn't for feminism you wouldn't be getting sex outside of marriage.
You got some nerve to be saying that about her, and judge her for something that even you do and allow. You are a male version of a feminist.
@btbc92 as much as you go back an forth with me it's like we are having word sex haha, does it turn you on to talk this much? I bet you get ignored a lot huh? It's ok I think I understand, your just lonely because of all these men rejecting you for lack of sex, my best advice is you better get good at blow jobs if you want any quality dates, @btbc92
What in the world are you even talkin about? Is your mind at Twisted that you got to try to make up stuff just to feel validated for what you do? Who said anything about me being lonely? I am perfectly capable of handling things on my own and I don't need to be involved with this crap. And first of all I don't do any of that crap. And last I checked I'm a lady not a whore. And first of all I don't like those kind of men anyway I don't even call them men. Not interested in dogs. Them rejecting me lets me know there's better out there. And I can care less about being ignored I actually prefer it. Save me the trouble of having to kick some dudes butt for harrassment.
Are you sure you replied on the right person? @btbc92 what in the hell are you talking about? I can show you some twisted shit though, you ever tried anal sex since your trying to keep your virginity intact? You can still have sex in your ass
Do you even know what the hell you're talkin about! I find it laughable that you are telling me all this garbage and you don't even know what sex is. Anal sex is sex you idiot. Virginity is a state of your mind not just your body! Any form of exchange of bodily fluid is sexual contact there for you are no longer a virgin. Go back to sex ed class! And I am not going to be having some homosexual acts being done. It called gay sex for a reason. That's how you get tons of disease. Your penisn of mouth don't belong there. Study Anatomy. And that's how you also transfer parasitic worms. Omg.
And I have met plenty of gentlemen that don't treat women like you do. I can see why plenty them has said not to pay attention to guys like you. And second of all, I'm the one that rejects them. They just get mad because I said no to sex before marriage. And I most certainly do not want to get some disease. Glad that my late mother taught me better before she died of cancer caused by HPV. It's a shame how you men sell yourself short. I can very much attract men as I always done without the need of sex and flaunting myself. And a good amount happen to love the fact that I never been doing those nasty things you suggesting for me to do. Anybody tries to suggest anything like that and run for the Hills! That's filth man. Filth.
Whoever told you you can't lose your virginity through that lied to you. Ignorance at its best.
I can see how many of you get gonorrhea, HIV, Aids, HPV, syphilis, etc and rashes on yourselves. Talk about unclean. You people just asked for the stuff.
Take my dick in your ass @btbc92 :)
@bigcuband You are a nasty piece of shit. You've been reported.
@jamie05rhs nobody especially me cares what you say or think 😂
The #MeToo and #TimesUp movements, and false accusations. I took a trip to Eastern Europe (Ukraine, Belarus, Russia, etc..) and to Southeast Asia. These women basically grovel at the feet of Western men. I literally had my pick and could have 5 women a night there if I wanted with no fear of any of these false rape accusations. In the Philippines especially they basically worship men like me who have blonde hair and blue eyes. If you live in the West or in Western Europe (or even the Scandinavian countries), I suggest you go see Eastern Europe and Southeast Asia. You will be treated like a King.. no no.. a GOD!
Hahaha. NO. Don't believe him. Not all Asian ladies are like that.
I voted "negative self image of themselves". Nowadays masculinity is demonized & viewed systemically as a plague that needs to be eradicated. As a school teacher (I substitute all grades K-12), I see the favoritism towards girls all the time. So many individual activities and assignments... when boys are more active and need to work with their hands. Any type of rough-play or pretend-weapons that boys naturally do to toughen each other up... get immediately shut down. Long individual assignments (boys have an average lower attention span).
They lack self love. A lot of men I noticed are followers. Seek validation and aren’t confident in their own abilities or what they have to offer a girl. Most men are douchebags, players, fuckboys that just want attention, recognition. They feel they have to lie to impress a woman. They feel like their occupation isn’t good enough. They don’t make enough money. Women are also more independent than ever. Women don’t want anchors that will drag them down. A lot of men think they need to compete with other men to gain more confidence. It starts with self love, self respect and integrity. Being your true you and expecting the same In return.
I lacked confidence at a young age because I thought being a genuine gentleman was all that mattered when it came to dating but I was wrong. I was just harbor of attracting problems and that's it. So much drama and crazies happens to critical and too fast.As I got older and built social defense against the most illogical things western females tend to pull on me. Pushing her away her drama, her craziness, showing no personality what so ever and then expects me to act all sexual around her. I am just too fatigue to go out of my way and talk to someone I like at a physical level especially when they give off this body language of ignoring my approaches or showing respect to them.In addition, so many +A models turned into deadbeat single moms/ rotten sex dolls tend to not fix their problem but instead find a man to dump the problem on.
Too much pussification of men these days!! Boys cannot be boys! Men cannot be men... when I was young if you didn’t at least break your nose you weren’t playing hard enough. The things my friends and I did would horrify parents today! Sports without any safety equipment, jumping our bikes off of homemade ramps no helmets of course. Fighting when you were wronged! We picked on each other and we got picked on. Bullying can be a bad but it made people tougher. No one in my day killed themselves because they were bullied... they grew thicker skin. Today, boys are practically girls! I think that’s the goal... death of the alpha male!
I see. Less and less men now would like to be a hero, an activist, fighting for and protecting something precious like this planet earth.
I wouldn’t even call them men... they are boys never able to grow up to be men. I told my ex-wife a long time ago that I would step out in front of a moving bus to save her and her response was “you would do that for anyone including a stranger”. The reality is she was right. Today’s men are scared of everything including women!!! Us old timers are not afraid of anything lol. @el_Te_de_la_Rosa I looked at your profile picture and I am not afraid to say that I think you are a beautiful woman and I would love to take you out for dinner... the young men of today wouldn’t say that because of fear of rejection or fear that it’s somehow sexist calling you a beautiful woman... or they are just afraid of their own shadows... I don’t know lol.
I'm from a country full of ladyboys and lots of effeminate men. We have discussions on this issue quite often. The cause is certainly not because of soy products. 😆Anyways, thank you very much for your kind words and insight. I don't think "beautiful" is sexist. However, hearing this a lot from many who have no intention to be in a serious, long term relationship is meaningless. I'd prefer "you're interesting / smart / or even weird" because, at least, they learn something about me too, not only the appearance.I'm from a cou
I hear you about the “smart or interesting” comment but you must understand that the first thing anyone sees is the outer you... so the fact that you hear “beautiful” a lot is because real men aren’t afraid to say what comes to their mind. After getting to know you even a little is where the compliments “smart and interesting might come in to play. So out of curiosity... why do you think you are weird?
My personality regards to MBTI is INTJ. The ways I process things are different from other women. Most memes and quotes about INTJ are mostly accurate. I tend to think like men. Flowers, gifts and sweet words don't work. I'm more intereseted in mental connection (through deep conversation) rather than physical appearance and superficial things. If a man says he likes me, but never tries to talk, getting to know me, I wonder it's lust, not love. No matter how strong the attraction towards a person is, if he is not single, get married, I can dismiss the person right away since I analyze what would be the outcomes. I consider being emotional is not wise. Logic and knowledge are my favourite. Hence, "you are different." is what I heard from them many times.
I as an engineer am a big fan of logic but emotions are important too. I didn’t know what INTJ was so I had to look it up. There was a little personality test there so I took it. Turns out I am a ENTP... it’s mostly actuate. I too enjoy mental stimulation or emotional stimulation... again I think emotions are important I prefer a mental challenge. You are a joy to talk with. I requested to follow you.
MeToo didn't really change anything, it's just an excuse for man playing the victim or men for some reason assuming things that are not the case, like that a woman will instantly call the cops on them if they just look at her.Less testosterone... is that the case? I don't think so. And even if, there's still plenty of it left.MGTOW is not a reason for low confidence, it's a consequence of if.Confused? Yeah. There's no formula for it so you don't have a guarantee that what you do will work.Negative self image is the stock reason for low confidence. Obvious, isn't it?Too much rejection may also be a reason, no one likes to be rejected after all. If you know you'll fail, why try?In conclusion I suppose negative self image and lack of confidence always go hand in hand. The question is, where that negative self image comes from. Rejection can cause it for example. I suppose rejection can also cause confusion about what women want, or strengthen it if it's already there.
If I was younger I would agree with you but now it just seems hard to find girls with good feminine traits, good health, and a fun personality.I mean there could be plenty of out there but I don't meet them in the places/hobbies that I like going to. I don't try too hard, I don't want to go for a chase either I think it's stupid. Current females that I meet in my case want to provide depression and misery and expects me to sexually subdue them. That is no fun for me.
If there are no girls you like to begin with that is unfortunate, but I wouldn't call that lack of confidence.
Too much risks and losses for too little results.Women today feels much more entitled and are much pickier. They want everything without making a single effort. They have sense of superiority over men.A man has to do everything to catch the attention of a woman, and in the end the result is never assured. Men have to approach, court, pay for everything, have a good social status and a good bank account, look good, while not having a say on how the relationship will go.And since women are very picky, the chance of success are low, unless you're a rich hot dude.Confidence comes with success. Failing too much breaks the confidence.
Who said men lack confidence with women in 2019? Personally I can approach any girl anywhere, and I used to. It was really fun, exhilarating and you never knew where the conversation was going to go, or what might happen! 99% of the time I was met with positive reactions and interest.However in 2019, approaching, dating and anything else... fails the most basic of cost to benefit analysis. When you take time and look beyond a pretty face or a nice body, and really weigh up the pros and cons, you might just find that the juice is not worth the squeeze.Confidence might not be the issue...
Negative self image, and perhaps a lack of knowledge. I asked a guy who was very popular with girls why he's so good at it. And he said that women are mental, most of our attraction/arousal takes place in our head. I'm not sure how that helps but run with it.
Well, women are certainly head cases.
That guy was absolutely right. Females have always chosen mates using a broader set of criteria - being really attractive is only one factor, there are many others of greater importance. (Not for a hook-up culture, however - in that case looks become paramount. Thus, one of the situations that's occurring right now.) But for longer term relationships, attractiveness drops significantly down on the scale of importance.
Plus he was good looking too?
@AmandaYVR, males are optimized to bring in high-density nutrients, rich in fats and protein. They are also optimized to defend offspring against other males, who instinctively would kill the offspring that aren't their own. Thus, more criteria would need to be evaluated to determine a suitable male vs. a suitable female, who need merely be fecund.
@HereIbe Until the invention of birth control and DNA testing, men didn't know for certain if the offspring was theirs (aside from obvious cases of differences in skin and hair colour, etc.). Go back far enough in time and you see that the young were raised in communal tribes, and all males who had mated with the female would share in the responsibility of raising and protecting the child, because they didn't want event their potential offspring to not survive. They did not kill them off.
@AmandaYVR, go back in time? BULLSHIT. Show some hard evidence for your stupid speculation. HARD EVIDENCE. Show the data.
I asked you that
I mean @sageevalentinee, he was much good-looking too?
For all those asking, I would not say he was particularly good looking. I would say average, maybe just above. But if you didn't know by now, there's more to attraction then just your face. Even if you're lucky enough to have nice face, the initial reaction to that will soon wear off.
Yeah. I've done a lot of research, on my on, on that too. I've a friend who's just average looking but slays 9 or 10 type girls. And I'm good-looking but still it's hard for me to get even a 7 to 8 girl for casual hook ups!
I don't understand why people are afraid of rejection. Everyone gets told NO a lot. It happens to everyone everyday. It's not the fucking end of the world. Life goes on, the sun will still rise, you will still wake up, and you'll go about your normal life.
They don't know what they want, let alone what a woman wants. They just know they want something.Guy goes to a club knowing he wants to meet s girl, but has no clue what type, she just has be good looking. He also has no clue what women want, so he acts like what he thinks women want.Generally he comes off like an ass. Then doesn't understand why he can't find someone, anyone, to give him a chance.In general, he dresses sloppy, drenches himself in cologne, drinks for courage, and tries to impress. She tests him, and he fails, miserably.If guys slowed down and paid attention, they would see that a woman will tell them everything they are looking for. Every woman is different, but they will subtlety tell what they want.
@coachTanthony I don't quite understand why the MeToo is in the option, and indeed at the top of the options?What does the #MeToo movement - women opening up to their assault and rape experiences - have to do with men's 'success' at 'winning over' women? And the confidence of men?
And the same for MGTOW. What on earth has that got to do with men's confidence?If some men choose to do their own thing - fine. But how does that affect some other chap?
The only way to find out is to ask the question. Many men have claimed that this movement is toxic and have men giving up on women all together. I want to know why and have listed it as a choice. Not here to debate the movement itself. Thanks for the comment.
Getting sucked into the MGTOW movement could be one way someone embraces their lack of confidence.
@ differentpixel , Men worry metoo will go too far.I'm all for more people reporting assault etc.But it's not just that, they try to enforce their own justice.I agree some cases can be slow but with no evidence or witnesses you can't be fast on these cases or you risk jailing an innocent.It's also got into attacking men who any woman says is a rapist. Leave the justice to the court, just positively reinforce the assumed victim to speak out and go to court, don't berate the assumed attacker.Besides rape is an attackers issue that has female victims.People go about solving it all wrong.You aren't going to stop it by protecting the victims.You will stop it by preventing it from even happening.Which means developing men's mental health stigmas, so they can talk to someone instead of taking there issues out in others. As well as education, but I think all men know rape is bad already.
@differentpixel I don't understand anyone's issue with the #MeToo movement, either. It's pretty simple: Don't rape.
Looking at the options I think it's a bit of everything, to be honest. We live in a world where it's faker then ever, it's hard to trust people these days and be genuine because even friends I used to be close to would only want something if it benefitted them. Seems like a man's worth in society is how big is his dick, how big is his wallet, how tall is he, just very stupid petty things. I would have more respect for a guy who is a part of a non-governmental organization and goes to Africa to help communities in need of food, water and creating shelters than a man who has all the ladies and is a complete playboy. It's those type of values that are lost now, we live in a very narcissistic, egotistical, manipulative, superficial world.
So to piggy back off my answer from above I think that’s why men lack confidence in women. Men feel that if they are not apart of this social perception through the eyes of others they can’t get a woman because she won’t give him the time of day. However obviously, not all women will act or behave that way. There are women who love a guy regardless of size or job. A guy could be a construction worker and look like a tooth pick but still attract someone out there. I don’t have a confidence issue per say, I just have an issue with what girls look for nowadays, same case for girls/women who want to find a special guy in her life.
I do respect guys who work with NGOs too. Well, one thing I disagree with you is about "size"... Why do men think it matters so much?
@el_Te_de_la_Rosa technically it’s true, women want to be with taller guys, and guys care their dick size because they feel it defines them as males (it’s a guy thing).
I've never thought of that. I'm more interested in a chivalrous man. Well, FYI I turned down all men mentioned about how big they are. Don't worry. Your brain and your heart are more important.
I think the reason would be most are to needy most are to willing to share everything about there relationship to there friends and then listen to there friends about what she's doing (wrong) don't cater to him you will make him lazy let him do his own food girl have some respect.. all that BS... Now it changes from women to women but honestly if she wants to do it and he did not ask her to. Why do the friends think it's wrong and bad.. his her freaking choice...
It's a combination of the #metoo movement, women don't know what they want in a man or wanting to change them to then reject them when you get him in the girlfriend / just a friend status as a man; and also the repeated feminist rhetoric in the media and society belittling men for being men.
All the feminism of today and the whole dont need a man has made it to where young men everywhere dont see a point in getting married anymore. Its more on the womens mind now of wanting to get married and settle down. Men dont have confidence in women bc women have lost their modesty and ladylike qualities that made them priceless. Now when you have cam girls and instathots we dont need to be in a relationship to get sex so we tend not to get into relationships period. Put in the whole women are better than men mentality society has now men are fed up and would rather stay by themselves then have a ball n chain
Other-- the overwhelming majority of females today (not just today though; it's been this way for many many years now, maybe decades) are not physically attractive enough to get my interest, usually due to being overweight. I am not confident in females' ability to actually be self-analytical and self-reliant enough to actually make themselves attractive... instead I just hear lying and bullshit online and in person about how fat females are still somehow attractive, when they aren't. I don't trust them to make good choices for themselves, or for how they speak to each other.
So men shouldn't be lazy too then. I am one who comment (well, complain) that some are not attractive enough. It's not because of the face, but the body. They lack of discipline in the first place, to look good and have a healthy lifestyle. Thus, it's a cause of lack of confidence.And what would you do if you find someone who is attractive for you? How do you approach her?
@el_Te_de_la_Rosa Yeah I agree guys shouldn't be lazy either, but I see a heck of a lot more guys who are overweight and unsuccessful in dating decide to stop being lazy and start exercising hard at the gym; I don't see as many girls doing that.Anyway, how do I approach a girl I find attractive? Well sadly I have always been bad at that. Perhaps I do lack confidence because of times in my life where I have tried to speak to my feelings with a girl or approach a girl and have been shut down, which is a hard thing to take. Plus I'm currently in a relationship so unfortunately I really don't approach other girls often anymore, even though I'd like to.
That's good. Being approached by non-singles is not pleasant as well. I respect you for that.I have no idea about girls who don't watch their own bodies and health. Maybe it's because we live in different areas. Majority of men in my town have big bellies since they drink a lot. Having deadly visceral fat. Most women here are natuarally skinny. Even they don't workout much. Food could be a factor I supposed.
@el_Te_de_la_Rosa Where's that?
Thailand. Yay! I'm selling my country. But it's true.
@el_Te_de_la_Rosa I would love to go to Thailand.
Welcome. Our food and nature are still attractive.
A man not being a man. Movement? Who cares. Eat mor veggies, home made food, lift sone iron, have more sex. That'll get the testo going. I don't know what is MGTOW? Every women is different, can't really put them in the same category, like us men. Man up, if you dont like what you look like then, cahnge what you can.. Fuck a regection, if you do, thank them for there time, be humble and be about you day.. Thats just me..
MGTOW is men going their own way.
some women take advantage of the situation and just go on dates to get free stuff or build their own self confidence and forget whatever the guy is wanting, not to mention if he doesn't fit into the woman's idea of what relationships are then he labeled as having personal issues that he needs to resolve on his own, seems to me the fault is always placed on the man if something goes wrong, etc.
I’m definitely following this question. Nice post 👍🏻
I've got porn, good friends, and a lovely little puppy. How the hell would a woman improve my life? I'd have to buy a shitload of new clothes, spend money on food and dates, take much more time out of my day to make sure somebody else is happy for nothing in return.
The almost extinct person to person connection and conversations that can be had between a man and a woman. Coupled by the fact that women seem to think that almost everything can be construed as sexual harassment. Especially when they FEEL uncomfortable in a situation, or the guy approaching them isn't what they are particularly attracted too. At the end of the day, men just need to focus on success and pushing themselves to do better, and better themselves. If the women realize that, they will come. Or you can always try the, "tried and true" method for attracting women. Have a lot of money and shiny things. They will come out the woodwork.
All of the above, except replace MGTOW with feminism.The essence of MGTOW advice is that you should not draw your self esteem from woman’s approval. As men and boys I think it’s in our nature to want to act that way, but it’s not good for us. Not for now at least. With the state of Feminism and metoo as it is, their advice is to focus on yourself invest in yourself and steer clear of this stuff, whether the storm.When it comes to women, it’s obvious that it feels like these days you’re risking more and that there’s seemly no reliable right path. So where once it seems to have been something you could work toward, now it’s gambling with your life.The rest of the reasons also hold true. in my opinion.
Confidence that they can get one, or confidence that they can find one good enough? Because for me the problem is it seems nearly impossible to find a good woman. So many have bad morals and too many bad past decisions so they are completely not worthy/not relationship material.
I am going to say more than one of these answers are it. Women run men down too much. The feminazi have ruined relations too.
Negative self-image, and too much rejection.It's basically their fault because a real man doesn't point fingers and blame other things for being the way he is, if you're a real man you realize the problem, admit it, solve it, and becoke better, sadly barely any male does this anymore which leads to a loop of negative self-images.And too much rejection drops down their confidence, which also is pathetic considering a man should be hard as steel and not depend on validation from women to keep his confidence up, such males are too weak and dependant on others to be called masculine.
Other. I think men today have no idea how to be men after being brainwashed to act like women via school, the media and virtually every other medium of communication. Consequently this also corresponds to lack of male influence in the home. It results in not having an understanding of how things are.We also have most of the women trying to act like men these days. The result is confusion creating a lack of confidence as I see it.
Why in the world would MeToo be the main reason if one is a decent guy to begin with? MeToo isn't against good guys, it's about getting the harassers, abusers, and deviants out. If MeToo is your issue, that's something you and potentially the law need to deal with.
@anon some really freaky anti-metoo people on GaG. Seriously scary.Thanks for trying to raise the issue, as I did. I'm concerned that 'the coach' (or however he styles himself) is leading many young people astray. The options on this poll - very freaky weird. Sinister. No basis in reality. Really anti-women stuff.But, I guess that's the age we are living in, right.
Because men want sex. MeToo will bar them for the most part from getting access to sex with a woman via hookup or dating. Men would not approach a woman he doesn't want sex with. It's not solely because you're pretty, trust me. It's not about the law. It's how far in intimacy is too far before she screams 'rape'. In that situation, its the fact that men openly fondle and touch girls and girls, in general, assuming it's natural and desirable in dating situations to allow it before they encounter somebody like me who doesn't agree with it before a certain time frame or marriage. THAT is what they hate. They hate feeling 'restricted' sexually. Neither side gets that about the opposite sex. They listen to society and society fails us.
Most inexperienced and naive girls and women also don't SPEAK UP about what is uncomfortable because many assume doing such things is normal in a relationship. And if you say no you must be a prude, religious, aka anything to shame your sexuality as a person. Until you do GIVE IN sexually through peer pressure and now you not only feel 'raped' but ashamed of what you did and who you now became. A lot of men sadly don't understand and many don't care. That's why MeToo is very important for people like that. But for those who allow this practice only to shame the man later are toxic. There is no sexual liberation in that. I ALWAYS tell people do NOT touch people you don't know. And if you're concerned, ASK, TALK, COMMUNICATE. One side the women say it's okay to go for a kiss! Men do it and then gets slapped. What does that say? Assumption's is a BAD IDEA. Miscommunication and lack of understanding can put either of us, but mostly them behind bars or left for dead and raped for real. I was taught to open my mouth. It's a shame a lot of girls aren't vocal about what makes them sexually uncomfortable. Just explaining.
@differentpixel I am not leading anybody anywhere. Get off your high horse. I am not anti MeToo because I ask a question. How do you come to this conclusion? You don't know me.
Never have I heard any of my single guy friends bring up MeToo as the main reason they lack confidence. I find that disturbing that a guy would say that because to me that says he's a predator who feels threatened by a movement designed to keep predators like he would be, away from women not the good decent guys who are just looking for a date or sex or whatever with no intention to force, pressure, harm, coerce, drug or black mail them to get what they want. I think that kind of statement does a huge disservice to the plenty of good men out there and makes it seem like the women who have actually suffered in the dark at the hands of predators need to go back in the closet and shut up and keep getting abused to appease these people. That's why that is very odd to me that that's even on the list, let alone the first thing there.
You have to understand OP that again, MEN want SEX. It doesn't matter if he's a good guy or a bad guy. If he sees that sex is not possible by assumption ALONE, he will walk. MeToo just helped raise the awareness for men in general that unless he's willing to take a risk to speak to any woman, he just may toss himself under the bus. Remember, nobody really believes in waiting for marriage to have sex anymore or hold godly standards. This is the world we now live in. Can't really trust anybody anymore. Not even family or friends.
@btbc92 I'm not really sure I follow your train of thought or support the idea that no one is waiting for marriage, and all men want is sex. I don't speak for men or pretend to know what they all want. Confidence can be about approaching women for dates or sex or just the ability to talk to women in general.
OP, never said anybody is waiting. The fact that most are not which goes into the same as what is being said. Men lack confidence because we're changing the landscape that allows both sexes to be in healthy environments. When its overly sexual things go bad. It's not that your speaking for men. But that each man has different agendas in how they wish to obtain sex. And most of us women are not just going to hand it over freely, and again, that's what many hate. Which leads more than 50% of rapist and such to commit sex crimes. What am saying is that most of these problems would not happen if we stuck to how things were traditionally done. Ask any male. They will not approach a woman without some sort of sexual contact. If you told them there would be no sex, 99.9% would run, unless they claimed asexuality.
Confidence is not the issue. Is whether or not a sexual relationship will occur. If sex was never part of relationships most men will not bother with women. That's the point I'm making. It's not about just sex. Its sex in general. No sex, no relationship. Men see women as access to sex in general. I should know. I don't believe in sex or porn or masturbation anything before marriage, and many ran the opposite way. There is a reason why so many people say 'a relationship without sex is just a friendship.' Sex is importance for 90% of people mainly secure people or nonreligious before marriage, but not many hold that same for marriage. This is why there is a confidence issue. If a man holds no sex appeal to her, he feels unworthy as a man and may want to commit suicide for himself. Sex is tied to a man's self-esteem and being. Its a part of him. Men are not like women.
Metoo is fringe TBH. Solution is not be rich or famous and the likelihood of being conned (she lies about some sex act and you get #metoo’d and SUED is slim.
@buttcrackjoe That is not going to save you. Keeping your hands to yourself will. It is wise for men to not touch women. Period.
A woman can't get away with a lie if you never touch her. I don't pity men when they don't listen. She's not your wife, don't do it. I don't care WHAT she says. Do it and she claims rape, well, it ain't gonna matter what you thought, it's what she thinks of it that's going to matter.
@btbc92 im sure people lie about it
@buttcrackjoe Its not about lying. Its the fact that men touch women their not married too then get upset when she feels that she was raped or harassed. I have been harrassed plenty of times. Men don't approach me now because they now know I will not do things sexually before marriage. If they even try they know they where they're heading if their no husband of mine. As I said, don't touch her, even if she thinks it's okay. If she is not trustworthy and is bold sexually, their a red FLAG. Even in the Bible, Solomon talked about such women. She will lead you into hell. Literally.
@btbc92 And you've just blatantly described why men fear the me too movement. "Keeping your hands to yourself will. It is wise for men to not touch women" But how do you know what her limit is? How do you know she won't consider it harassment or assault if you so much as tap her on the shoulder? You have no idea what will set her off, so why even bother risking it in the first place? This is why i say women who support #metoo are either blissfully ignorant to how that complete uncertainty terrifies men from approaching any woman, or know full well the fear it instills in them and just don't care.Which one are you?
I tell girls all the time. Do NOT allow him to touch you in any way sexually, I don't care if he is your boyfriend. He is NOT your husband. Because if your uncomfortable, and you don't say anything, you are at fault for not speaking UP. He doesn't deserved to be seen as some 'rapist' because you didn't set boundaries from the start. Bad enough he shouldn't have done so without asking. This is what I was taught and it protected me from potentional rape. Have self control. I was randomly touched always from boys in Kindergarten because the boys thought I was pretty. Were taught to ask first for a reason. The rules have not changed. It's just people who think they don't have to follow that breaks them and then get into trouble. These girls only bring you trouble if you pursue them yourself. Men need wisdom. And they lack wisdom.
@Malik00 "But how do you know what her limit is?" Ask her: "DO YOU think it's okay to touch sexually or have sex before marriage? Yes or no? If yes, what are your LIMITS?" What the hell is so HARD? This is what I mean by communication. You people don't ASK!"How do you know she won't consider it harassment or assault if you so much as tap her on the shoulder? You have no idea what will set her off, so why even bother risking it in the first place? " Ask her if she is sensitive to certain things. For people like me who are spiritually sensitive or called Empaths or Highly Sensitive People, look us up, we have sensitive EVERYTHING. Our bodies, immune system, etc trap and absorb everything. Not just as an introvert, like many introverts, for the most part, don't always want to be touched. This is why being FRIENDS is IMPORTANT. because you study and learn everything about a person. Because this is who you're going to be dating and MARRYING if you get that serious. It doesn't change like you men don't like to change often. The problem with you people, women included is that you feel ENTITLED to do whatever the hell you want. I don't even like to be hugged all the time by family, parents or even friends. That's just me. If I say 'stop', I mean STOP. Not keep going. Others will mock me for my sensitivity and this causes us to lash out until we kick you OUT of our lives for disrespect.
@btbc92 But then who do you trust? You know damn well very few people these days wait until marriage before any sort of sexual interaction.
"Which one are you?" I am on the side of the innocent. The side for God. If he says these things are unacceptable, I don't care what society thinks it's acceptable in dating and opposite-sex interactions. Boundaries must be set and sexual interactions are only RESERVED for married couples. SO. If somebody screams MeToo I make SURE I get the entire view of the said victim and the perpetrator. Meaning if they all believe in premarital sex, I don't feel that sorry for most. Because I was taught better to not allow a guy to touch me inappropriately. I get called a prude for it. I don't care. Most women and girls sadly put themselves in those positions and very few like me are stuck into those problems.
@btbc92 Points for self awareness.
@Malik00 I trust who God says for me to trust. The same way you have to ask people direct questions is the same way I ask God direct questions. I ask God "Lord, is this man trustworthy for me to be around?" And if I get in my spirit 'NO', you can impress me all day and night, the big man upstairs said NO. That's all.
I’m glad you have your head screwed on straight. Me too sounds like a great thing but now it scares people to make them believe that we live in a rape culture. This isn’t the case because to imply that is to say we celebrate and protect rapists which we don’t and we send rapists to prison, even for life in some jurisdictions. Me too also seems to love painting every male human as a potential rapist in which is a label the vast majority of men and boys don’t deserve. This lead to the massive false sexual assault outbreak where even a good friend of mine wasn’t immune. Me too taught to believe women at all costs which is why the alleged rapist, regardless of the trial verdict becomes a pariah for the rest of his life because no one wants to associate themselves with even an accused rapist, and the woman goes scot free. Now men are afraid to accidentally bump into a woman because she could easily misconstrue it as an unwanted touch. The metoo movement had good intentions but the people who used it heavily abused it influence and all it did in the end is make sexual crimes harder to solve because it groups rapists with all men in general and it made the relations between men and women worse.
The problem is that what most men are not understanding or refuse to understand that is not accidental if it's intentional. What matters again is how she feels. Me too never taught us something that is instinctual for us from day one of our conception. Like I said in my original post. If it was back into those times when men were taught to be chivalrous whether they were knights or militia, the overall behavioral standards that men and women of call to, many of us would not be in this fix. Especially having Godly standards. Ever since my poor encounters with men stimming all the way back to my first time in the kindergarten, I now have to watch my back, as well as watch myself. Because there is nobody to protect me. I now must protect myself. The same way you men now have to protect yourselves.
It's the same way I get painted as a gold-digger or user or prove because I refuse to have sex before marriage, and believed that men on the 1st date should offer to pay for meal since he ask me to date. I don't believe in chasing after men. I don't believe in using a man. I rather take care of myself and be by myself, then to be involved with a guy who can't even trust me to do the right thing by him. When I cannot even trust him to do the right thing by me. That's why I never dated and that's why I never bought it with men in the first place. It's not fair that I treat every person with respect but I get treated like dirt because I am a woman of standard. Or that I should be touched because I look attractive to most. We need to start treating people like human beings again and stop treating people like sex objects. But that is never going to change because we're too far in. This is why sex robots are to take over. Human interaction is being replaced with technology.
Women have to protect their womb since men no longer desires to be her husband to protect her, from thieves who desires to use her body. Women are highly prized in this world and that's what makes it hard to be a woman let alone what makes makes us feel that being a woman and female is a curse. The real world has now become more unbearable.
@Malik00 don't tap them on the shoulder, then. That's her shoulder, not yours. You have no right to touch it.
"Me too sounds like a great thing but now it scares people to make them believe that we live in a rape culture."We do. Apparently you've never been in a high school boys' locker room."This isn’t the case because to imply that is to say we celebrate and protect rapists which we don’t" No; we do. Many famous and powerful people commit sexual assault and get away with it. And they are protected. (Jeffrey Epstein being the exception because he took it way too far and his luck just finally ran out.)"and we send rapists to prison, even for life in some jurisdictions."This is also not true. Have you ever heard of the rape kit backlog? And that's just the women who have reported. Then what happens when a suspect is arrested and the case goes to trial? A lot of rapists get off and go free. And for those that are convicted? Even if they are given a lengthy jail sentence, a lot of them get out early due to liberal policies. (Thank your local Democrat politician.)
@Jamie05rhs 1. I have. Everyone is either quiet and minding their own business, picking on each other, talking about their own personal lives with one another or complaining about gym class. Not once did a girl ever come up in conversation.2. The only reason famous and powerful people are less likely to get punished for sex crimes is because people accuse him with nothing but their say so in an attempt to make them become pariahs but it doesn’t happen because the fans will defend their hero on any crime not just murder. Look at how many people still defend OJ Simpson after he was convicted of murder. The fans don’t believe the accuser because their women or anything stupid like that but because they know that associating yourself with a celebrity will allow them to ride the coattails and become famous themselves. That’s how people like Kim Kardashian got famous. When it comes to rape accusations you don’t really have to do anything. Just say that a celebrity raped you and you get sympathy, every one calls you brave for coming forward, you might get interviewed on tv and you might even get people to donate money to you. Once people eventually see what you could gain from it, that celebrity will get accusations from dozens of other people. Even if some people are telling the truth, it doesn’t matter because all the others are tarnishing the group’s name by crying wolf. I personally don’t agree with labeling the accuser a lair unless the evidence is forthcoming but I’m sure you can see where the fans are coming from. In my original comment I was referring to those who aren’t famous at all like the average college student. Rape is apparently a heinous enough crime in our culture that any random dude who gets hit with a false accusation will have his life ruined by the court of public opinion even if he was proven innocentAlso, I don’t know a single person on either side of the political spectrum who defends Epstein, I didn’t even know he existed until recently.
@Jamie05rhs 3. I’ll admit this concept is new to me but when I looked it up, people seem to be becoming more aware of the situation and are starting to audit the evidence labs to make sure all evidence gets processed. I don’t know where you are getting off claiming that a lot of rapists go free. According to page 24 of the Bureau of Justice Statistics, State Court Processing Statistics in 2009, it says that roughly 2/3 of the people who were accused of rape got convicted whether its rape itself or for other felonies and misdemeanors. Lastly, I don’t know what liberal policies let rapists get out early but if that’s true, I am even more glad that I don’t associate myself with them.
MeToo is against good guys because how would we make our interest known if we can immediately be slandered as a pevert and punished for sexual harrasment for even trying?
@btbe92 I grew up with a mother who thinks that belittling and hitting her children is the only way to get them to learn, but I don’t think all women were evil (I did at the time but I had no perspective yet). I have had a girlfriend who cheated on me, but I don’t think all women are evil. I have witnessed my friends have abusive relationships where their girlfriends beat the shit out of them in public as well as cheat on them even though I know they will never intentionally harm their partner, but I don’t think all women are evil. Do you know why I don’t think all women are evil after all that? It’s because of the few women I met who would never dream of hurting anyone and don’t blame an entire gender for the actions of an individual who stabbed them in the back. Those women helped me realize that perpetuating the notion that women are people who should be tiptoed around is intellectually dishonest and not true. I also honestly believe that there are men who are the same as those good women I mentioned, as all of my friends belong in that category. Even RAINN, America’s largest anti-sexual assault organization, said in a letter to the White House addressing the topic of why there is no such thing as a rape culture in 2014 that “While it is helpful to point out the systemic barriers to addressing the problem, it is important to not lose sight of a simple fact: Rape is caused not by cultural factors but by the conscious decisions, of a small percentage of the community, to commit a violent crime.”www.rainn.org/.../...rce-RAINN-Recommendations.pdf
@btbc92 That being said, I don’t blame you for being cautious around men as I tend to be that way around women too based on past experiences. I am learning to get over it now and I hope you do too.
@SnakeEyes71. You must have gone to a Christian school.2. O. J. Simpson was acquitted of the murders. He was only found liable in a civil case many years later.4. Only 2/3 of rapists getting convicted is still a VERY big problem. That means if you commit rape right now you have a 1 in 3 chance of getting away with it. If you had a 1 in 3 chance of winning the lottery, everyone would play. Those odds incentivize more rape. This is not a good thing for society.Also, the RAINN statement is not saying that rape culture doesn't exist; it's just saying that the perpetrators of sexual assault can't use that as an excuse for the crimes that they choose to commit. We all have a choice to engage in or reject any part of our culture that exists. Some of us are non-religious. Some of us don't vote. Some of us don't watch Game of Thrones. So it is definitely also an option for men to choose not to participate in rape culture.
Actually no. It's possible to be raised believing that any sexual advance without explicit verbal cinsent is rape, and therefore a guy could be too scared to make a move for fear of raping someone even if the other person is attracted to them.
MeToo makes it worse, because now they might be scared to say hello at work for fear of harassing. Some people are just more hormonal/more genetically fit. In which case they probably can't help but feel attraction to multiple people all the time and get caught staring by accident. At a certain point the guy just thinks 'wtf.'
@Robertcw The sexual advance itself isn't rape. But as soon as you touch them it kinda is.
@Robertcw I understand being more hormonal, but we still have to conduct ourselves in an appropriate manner.
I guess this also means that black folks who have an issue with the KKK aren't decent people. same with the Christians in the middle east towards ISIS
@CasaNorba I'm sorry but I fail to see how your analogies fit into the topic at hand.
@Snakeyes7 she claims a group of ignorant and hateful people who fear and demonize men have the right to condone their ignorance and hatred
From personal experience, and from real life observation, plenty of women are liars and accuse men out of jealousy when she can't have him, out of revenge, and out of regret. Lots of false accusations happen. It is pretty common.
Show me the women. I think it has more to do with value or reward for the effort made rather than confidence. Other than sex, I don’t see any long term objective with any woman worth the investment. Confidence expends energy and I am not wasting it unless I am being paid for it on the job.
For me its low self esteem. cause I have issues with anxiety and other things. but also not having a role model and isolating. Other factors for me was work for the years I worker 6 days a week and was never home it seemed like. it's hard to approach women and understand what she wants.
It is hard for young guys to have confidence when girls in their league reject them because they prefer hott guys out of league that will date down to fuck, but will not accept them as girlfriends or wives. However, for older men dating women 28 or above that is much of problem because by that age, after they have been fucked and ditched by dozens of guys (a half dozen per year for ten years), they are seeking a relationship; not another hott guy that will only fuck them.
I don't really think there's any number one reason, it's more of a bunch of other factors combined with personal choice. I can't really speak for everyone so I'll just give my reasoning if that's alright, I just really don't see the need for a relationship in my life, I'll approach pretty much anybody if I want to, but I won't take it past a friendship because of the reason above.
I say Otherbecause women today are far more creeped out, superficial and hypergamist than ever before. I dont see why you added mgtow as an option since a lot of men along with myself see this as an antidote to lack of confidence. I dont also dont see why you added MeToo as well since women been like this for quite while before that shit even existed (not to defend it of course)
It's "All of the above", with the greatest emphasis on MGTOW and PoundMeToo movements. Men and women just don't like each other anymore. Sure, men will always like sex and women will always like money, but having sex with a woman doesn't require liking her, nor does spending a man's bank account. Being confident with women requires a desire to be with women on a personal level. That desire has been depleting steadily for the last five years or so, and it's only going to get worse. Gender relations are at the lowest they've ever been.
I think the same reason women lack confidence in men. There are too many options out there, and as the human beings we are, we tend to compare ourselves to others, change ourselves for the likes of others. I mean there are soo many wonderful accepting women out there, but you're still going to go for that one woman you isn't interested. The fear of not being liked back or being replaced would be the main cause. And I suppose it goes for both genders
Why would any of that bullshit matter to a sane human being?
@HereIbe bye bye butthurt.
Butthurt? It's obvious that you're the one wallowing in butthurt and cowardice. NONE of those so-called "reasons" are worth the tiniest piece of cockroach shit. Only a weakling and a coward would be deterred by any of them.
@HereIbe lmao... Someone is pressed over a simple opinion... Cool down your red hairy butt
How CUTE! You think being taunted for you obvious stupidity is being "pressed"?
@HereIbe Yess little guy. Stay pressed... You'll get better soon
@Herelbe you are way overreacting. Natasha actually made a lot of great points.
@Jamie05rhs, she made no points at all. That crap only matters to cowards and weaklings.
@HereIbe lmao... You're getting old now... Get off the internet butthurt potato
I get it, you're butthurt and a total coward. Absolutely NONE of the stupid, silly little non-reasons you cite would matter to anyone who isn't a coward and a weakling. Since they matter to you, you're obviously a coward and a weakling.
@HereIbe awww... Baby it's ok... You'll be fine soon. Calling others a coward and weakling really doesn't do much... Prove me how my point is wrong lame ass..
I don't have to prove it wrong, because it only applies to cowards and weaklings. Nobody but a coward and a weakling would care about that crap, and cowards and weaklings don't deserve to have the world handed to them on a platter. Comparing yourself to others? A weakling's trait. Worthless, not done by worthwhile people. Change yourselves for others? Again, a weakling's trait. Fear of not being liked back or replaced? So what? Only a coward would let that stop him. Again, not worthy of being bothered with.
@HereIbe incase you were living right at the bottom of a hard rock... You aren't the only person who exists... There are people who go through these problems. Be a bit more compassionate and you would know. You probably have a sad life that's why you come up here trashing others for having an opinion
I don't trash people merely for having an opinion. I just point out the really stupid opinions. Why on earth would I want to live with a woman who is a weakling and a coward, a crybaby? My wife is STRONG, not some sad little sissy who lets other people dictate who she is. Me? As they say, steel sharpens steel. Most men are too weak to handle her. But you go on being a weakling, a coward, and a crybaby. Someone might eventually take pity on you or decide to take you on as an appendage to his will.
@HereIbe lmao... 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂get off the internet wrinkled dick
You just proved me correct. You're single, alone, and you have no clue why.
@HereIbe lmao... Bye bye butthurt grandpa.. Hope your dick falls off.
So, which wedding anniversary are you going to be celebrating in the coming year?
Love the question... great question... but multiple great answers
So what do you think?
I voted not knowing what a woman is looking for... but rejection is a close 2nd
Rejection is huge that is for sure!
@coachtanthony Agreed, rejection is huge, but I don't think that cuts to the heart of the real question/problem you are bringing up. Rejection and feeling bad and sad has always been a part of the human condition (and it is not a cross to bear for only males, although admittedly they deal with much much more if men have to continue to be the initiators - something I talk about frequently as being unfair and unfortunate. But females are facing more rejection now, as some males move on, in a constant quest for another lay). But let's go deeper than that - why is rejection now so much more signficant (if it is). Is it then low self-esteem? Why? Because parenting styles have changed somehow? Because the education system is failing to bring up young adults as it should? Because media has influenced the image of how people should behave? Because of the prevalence of superhero characters, badass combat fighters in video games, and movie action stars? Rejection is a part of life. Feeling inadequate is a part of life. What has changed inside the psyche of young males to cause a different/worse reaction to it? That is the real question.
@AmandaYVR When I was a kid and lost a championship soccer game we didn't get a trophy... we got a long exhausting painful ride home. The next year we lost again. Losing makes you stronger and more appreciative of the wins that you do get. Today is much different... you still get a trophy if you lose which I think is horrible. Now kids are playing soccer on teams where they don't even keep score because they don't want the kids to feel loss at such a young age. Kids are also now put on drugs at a whim which messes up their ability to really cope with the ups and downs of life. When they leave the nest they are more screwed up then ever. So coming around full circle to rejection in this day and age is quite significant when you haven't felt loss in your life. It mentally hurts even worse because you haven't built up any callus to it. This is obviously just one small thing but I thought it was worth mentioning.
Very good. Totally agree. I was wondering if that whole participation ribbon/consolation prize idea was being blown out of proprotion, I don't have kids and am not in that world so I really don't know it well, but you seem to know. This could lead to a discussion on 'helicopter parenting/lawnmower parenting'. We had no such phrases when I was growing up. Kids just went to school, graduated each grade without a big fanfare, and played outside in the neighourhood with friends until dark. Some of us even came home as 'latch key kids' and made ourselves a sandwich. And we didn't get abducted by child molesters and pedophiles. Maybe we stubbed a toe sometimes.
@coachTanthony You may have a point about the trophies. I will admit that I used to get participation trophies in soccer, even though most of my teams sucked.
Mannnn because Ariana taught them how to Thank you NEXT US if we mess up 😅...
The real cause is that today's men are confused about what today's women really want in a man that will get men into having a negative self images of themselves.Another cause is that not every woman is serious about getting into a relationship.
Really? I think it's the other way around.
That's my opinion! Everyone has his/her own opinion, so we have this G@G community.
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