Do you lower your standards when you've been single for a long time?

[vicky73]

i am always alone. till toay , I am over 46 , I am still single. I tried to lower so that I can find someone to get married, but I can't cheat myself, I can't accept someone I can't accept in my deeply heart. So I prefer to be single. Maybe till I die. It is frustrated, but it better to stay with someone I don't love. I just don't want to marry because marry.

[jennifer_bloom]

I don't really but i won't seek a non-existent target so I look at the single guys close to my age and that is my standard.

[cheapshotbob]

i haven't and have been single 28 years , they say you need to change something to get the person you want but you not being yourself is harder than living a lie just so yu won't be alone.

[Thorus]

Personally I wouldn’t let go of any hard dealbreakers, but I think I’d become less picky about the stuff that doesn’t matter. My dealbreakers are dealbreakers for a good reason.

[aWes0MeNeSs]

No. If anything, my standards have increased. I'm very happy by myself, so I have no problem staying single until I find someone who I really want to date, and I'm not willing to settle for less.

[BrighteyedAsh]

No. I considered it but I always caught myself. Though I did convince myself to give a nice guy a try. It did not go well and I was resolved afterwards to not lower my standards because then I just ended up wasting my own time.

Instead, what I did was stop being so in a rush to find someone because RELATIONSHIPS are what happen naturally.

I got a LOT of pushback from guys who wanted me to actively focus on pursuing a eelationship. They would start in with "Let me get to know you!" And I'd be like "Cool. Let's converse." And then they'd explain to me that they wanted me to drop everything and in essence 'put all my stock in them'... without knowing if we were viable or compatible.

I'm glad that, ultimately, I learned to value going with the flow. I went on to meet someone at a party who I instantly and naturally clicked with and a relationship formed based on shared interest and mutual enjoyment of each other. We're over 3 years and going strong.

Never settle!

[AngelGabe]

I'm sorry, but all of you saying you don't drop your standards should think twice.

People take too much credit for things. They think theirs a rigid list of things they like and dislike and they determine it. The simple truth is that there are circuits in your brain far more complex than your fancies. The people you find attractive were decidedly attractive to the rest of your brain long before you determined it. All the way from their facial symmetry to their scent. Your standards don't mean much when you've got a biological match all the way down to the genes. I know it's nerdy but think about it the next time you think you've decided you liked someone and think hard. I guarantee it's Day 1 type of deal

[Aethereal]

Lol! No I do not. I actually reinforce my standards. I know what I want and I refuse to settle. Being single for a long time is simply a reminder of how much more important it is to not settle. What if you settled, and the most compatible person finally appeared? Would you find a way to justify cheating?
I say be reasonable (with your expectations) but selfish (once you've clarified them).

[Daniela1982]

Nope, you in a lot of instances will pay for it if you lower your standards.

[Josue274749347]

I sometimes lower my standards because I'm shy and don't have the balls to ask a girl out which is frustrating but when I do lower my standards it hurts because I'm pretty much forcing myself to like them but in the end I recover and isolate myself from any girl dating wise

[aicarg]

I may sway on things like looks, and characteristics. But not really, there's certainly certain core values and standards that I abide to and seek out in a guy.

[Nic1330]

i lower my standards because the idea and reality of being alone is depressing, i just want someone to hold and love and regardless of how beautiful someone may be if they live long enough beauty fades.

[Jlegacy]

It depends on what you want. A fuck buddie or a real relationship. I have learnt to have fun even when I'm single. To carry an aura of sex, integrity, purpose and love. So I am hardly desperate about leaving my single life.

[kamiljano]

My standards are already so low they really cannot be lowered much. Then again I guess my very low standards might be the reason why all of my relationship so far were shit

[TacosRAwesome]

I've learnt not to after that experience. I was single for like ever with only a 2 month relationship and a couple dates sprinkled in when I got with my first ex, whose only redeeming quality was that his brain worked and he had a car.

[cavmanier]

Being single has nothing to do with needing to adjust standards. It would only make sense to evaluate standards if the person had been trying with a high number of people without success.

[GeanieJ78]

No. I think that is a sign of some desperation. There are good people out there. Just have to put the effort in to find them. Patience and perseverence.

[lightbulb27]

In general no.
I might mingle with anyone to talk, socialize, but I won't date if I don't see the package.

[SexyAshh]

Sleeping wise sometimes, but thats completly different from dating.

Dating wise i will always have high standards, i dont think you should ever lower that. Its just a matter of self respect

[mattdzz]

I've not been single for along time, except when I was in Iraq, but I would assume it only makes sense.

[MissDawn7961]

no , for what I want in a man is what I want in a man and that is that

[GaylaD]

Absolutely not. If anything you should raise them cause you already know you can do this shit all by your damn self

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Nope i don't lower my standards , if i meet a nice girl i do,
if not than it wasn't meant to be that is how life happens for
some of us

[OddBeMe]

Not necessarily. Just change your standards. Grass is always greener is pretty destructive thinking. Make friends with girls. You need to be able to talk to them before you start dating them