Jaded and tired of women and dating? What should I do now? Should I just stay single?

I am tired to see how everything that I do and try always ends up in complete failure and trust me I am what girls would consider “boyfriend” material only to end up in the same place always and them going for something completely different. I chase the good girls and they are just like “bad girls”. It seems that women expect so much of you anyways, not only physically but personality wise as well. All of these rules and tests you have to pass through. I haven’t met any girl who puts any effort at all to make it foster and grow into something more. This is all I find girls with emotional baggage, girls who just play with men for the fun of it, very possessive women and women with very high expectations as well. Its always the same no fun and just confusions and frustrations.

What should I do to make this better or should I just stay single and give up on dating.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Don't give up...just don't try so hard, but don't be a jerk either. Remember...girl or guy...people always want what they can't have. People appreciate what they have to WORK for. It gives it more value. Trying too hard actually has the opposite effect. It pushes people away whether you're a girl or a guy. I was guilty of the same thing with my ex. If you are "boyfriend material" make the next girl you date work for it a little...if you give everything you got they will never appreciate what you have to give. Be the Selector not the Selectee. Show her your worth by letting her know you have "options". Not literally...but don't be so available..or jump at every opportunity you have to hang out with a girl. Let her know you have your own life that is fullfilling with or without her in it...but still be respectful and a gentleman. The girls that take advantage of you gravitated to you because they knew they could. There are good girls out there who will appreciate everything you ARE most imptantly..and what you have to give. Stay positive!

    • Good answer. but I know VERY few guys that could keep this balance and not be ass holes. And I don't think it's a matter of making her feel like you don't have to be there, I've been in that relationship and it's terrible. It's a matter of not wanting to cling to her every word. But the kind of girl who would take advantage of a guy who did that isn't the kind of girl you want to be in a relationship with. You want to find some one who love and appreciate all the sh*t you do together.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • Shaun- HAH, yeah wise. Because all women are vindictive bitches, or whores or tricksters who just want to suck out your soul and make you miserable. Seriously? Grow up the hell up.

    On topic, though- quit complaining. If all you can think is "wah wah wah no girl is good ever, I should give up dating is miserable and I'll never find happiness that way" then you're not ready for a relationship anyway because you're bringing all kinds of judgmental emotional baggage of your own.

    More importantly, stop generalizing all women. Yes, I know it's not just guys, girls do the same thing "Why are all guys..." but I'm talking to you and about why you're complaining, not them. Not all women just want eye candy. Not all women have high standards, not all women are players, not all women want sex, not all women will make you jump through hoops and not all women will try to trip you up. If you're still in high school, or even the first two or three years of college then, well, you've got a long way to go. Not to mention at oldest you're 24, which means you've been seriously trying to date for at most 8 years. Really? That's your work ethic? Oh I can't find someone easily so I'm quitting and they're the problem, not me.

    Try looking in different places than you have been. If you go to bars, or clubs, or sororities or parties expecting to find girls... HAH! That's a good one. No, if you're in school, talk to people in your class, if not, go to the library, or ask friends about any nice girls they may know. Hell online dating is a surprisingly successful and useful thing, so try that if you're really feeling like no one's out there. But mostly you're just going though a bad break up, or a few and now you're bitching about it because no girl is perfect to you. How many different kinds of girls have you really dated?

    There's nothing wrong with girls. There are plenty of girls out there, like me, who just want a nice guy who'll help them and support them, who's intelligent and kind. Looks... Sure they'd be nice but mostly it's about how you treat me. And I don't need proof, or for you to jump through flaming hoops I just need respect and honesty. And that is not too much to ask.

    I know more girls with those kinds of standards than the sky high impossible ones you're talking about. I think you're the one that needs the adjustment, not women.

    After all, the only constant in all your failed relationships is you.

    • I don't know how old your post is, but that was one of the best answers I have read on here yet. Some of us do need a good slap in the face sometime to knock sense into us and your words sure did a good job of doing just that!

  • You can't just give up otherwise you might pass up on something that is right. There are good girls out there...and trust me I've been feeling the same way. I think most people go through these times where it feels like there is no one out there for you or that there are no legitimately nice guys (or in your case girls) out there and every relationship will end in failure. Eventually that person will come along (at least that's what I keep telling myself)


What Guys Said 3

  • Very wise for someone your age.

  • I feel you, however if you gave up dating what would you do? Maybe take a break and find that being single ain't all that bad. Then come back into the dating game with fresh eyes.

  • "and trust me I am what girls would consider "boyfriend" material"

    Time to an attitude adjustment. Clearly, you're not "boyfriend material" or you would already be someone's boyfriend. If you think you have nothing to learn then you will never grow or advance in any area of life, not just dating.

    How many women have you asked out in the last month? Where do you meet these women?

    Start analyzing some of your history and see if you come up with any patterns (for example, chasing women with baggage/problems, etc).