I need a way to hang out with her before I ask her out or something.

I casually met this girl about a year ago through a friend. He was an RA in her dorm building, and she lived across from him so I met her while visiting him. She caught my eye at the time but I was currently in a convoluted situation with another girl and didn't pursue her.

I just saw her the other day and figured hey, why not, so I went over to her and told her she looked familiar and asked where I knew her from. ("hey, remember me from that one time?" gets awkward real quick if they don't) She agreed that I looked familiar but she couldn't figure it out.

We walked and talked about random things, she asked me where I was from, etc until our paths separated, at which point I told her it was gonna bug me all day and asked her full name so I could see if facebook was any help. (I assumed that "hey, I'm an old acquaintance you don't remember meeting, wanna go out?" wasn't a good move)

So now we're facebook friends, but I don't know what to do next. I'd like to get to know her better. She hasn't said anything to me yet, and I need that next step to initiate and maintain contact. Keeping in mind I only have her facebook and not her number or anything yet.

The easiest way to make contact would be to tell her I figured out where I know her from, but I'm not sure I want to bring it up again. That's a bit of a dead end conversation, and I don't want to be seen primarily as her RA's friend but rather as my own person.

So how do I approach this? I feel like having met her before makes this tricky, and I need a way to hang out with her before I ask her out or something.

One thought I had, is that she lists playing piano under her interests, and I've been wanting to learn piano for quite some time, I could tell her I noticed she listed playing piano and say I've been meaning to find someone who can teach me, and offer to teach her guitar in return. But that seems a little to much too fast for a girl I've barely met.

So what would you do?


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  • I like the idea of contacting her more, and somehow arranging to meet, either as a small "date"(lunch, coffee, brunch, something) or for piano/guitar lessons as you say. That you are both musical may be a connection, of sorts, to help start things off. It might seem a bit much to just say, hey, let's meet, but other than that you don't really have much you can do, other than maybe hoping you run into her again. What if you meant it as more of a get-to-know-each-other-better thing, (which is what it is, mostly) and then see about an actual date from there maybe.

    I don't think you need to be so worried about having met before. If neither of you mentions it then it doesn't really matter, as, if she can't remember, then it will have no bearing on now, other than a vague sense of deja vu.