Should I not contact him for a few days?

Me and my guy are in the "dating stage." More than friends but not exclusive. But he told me that he really believes that I'm the one for him, but because of the distance that separates us, we agreed to see other people if we wanted to. As of right now, neither one of us are seeing anyone else. Here is the situation though: he's a very, very attractive guy. A 30 year old swim coach that girls drool over. He kinda knows it too, but not really cocky about it.

He professed his feelings for me (deep feelings including me being the one) last week and things have kind of escalated since. He knows how I feel, I know how he feels.

But he said something to me tonight that threw me off guard in a text message (we communicate by text mostly). He told me that he helped a group of college freshman girls tonight after work. They are swimmers where he works and after their swim, they all hang out with him. He says that he's like a dad, best friend, teacher, someone they talk to and he helps them with homework, nutrition, etc. But that it's something he normally does, not just tonight. My honest reaction was."ouch. that hurt." I know that he's technically single and that shouldn't hurt anyone. I just wondered why he told me that. Was it because he wants me to trust him? To be honest about it? Or was it to guage my reaction and make jealous? If you want to know what how I reacted to his comment: I said, "that's wonderful. girls need a positive male influence in their lives and it's great that you're willing to be there for them and provide that." He said, "I didn't have that kind of support in my life when I was younger and I was raised to try to do the right thing and I wouldn't feel right not doing it." I said, "right :-)" Then it was silence until we said gnite which was about 30-40 minutes later. I've been trying to tell myself to not come across as jealous and insecure. I'm trying really hard not to be. But I can't help but to wonder what his motive was for telling me. And would he really spend time with those girls if he were seriously dating someone or married? Is it right? Even though he's supposedly just a mentor to them? Should I trust him? Frankly, I don't know what to think or feel and I want to do the right thing. He's a great guy, but I have no idea what his views are on the whole spending time with the other sex is. A lot of guys think girls should shut their trap about them hanging out with single women. I know I'm not his girlfriend yet but he's told me that he think I'm the one. So I'm not sure how to react or feel about this. And don't be such a hater. He's a really good guy. I just don't think that married men or taken men should make it a point to be with single women regardless what it is. It's too risky. I don't know.I just want guys to tell me their thoughts on this. And I'm going out of town tomorrow. Should I not contact him for a few days? He said he'd be waiting for my return even though we talk thru text. What do you think

Btw, guys only need to answer. I pretty much know girl's views on this.
Also, the reason we communicate by text is because I'm hearing impaired. he's been real great about it too. So no confusion about that.


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What Guys Said 1

  • I would contact him personally.


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