Do I go ahead and date girl 2 OR sit around and wait for girl 1?

The first girl is my dream girl. She's absolutely gorgeous, smart. I have always been friends with her and have been extremely attracted to her, but don't see her being any more than a friend in the near future.

The second girl is very fun to be around. She's pretty, but not extraordinarily so, at least to me. She likes me a lot, and honestly I like her too. However, I would not call her my dream girl.

  • Girl 1
    Vote A
  • Girl 2
    Vote B
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Never wait for a girl. It NEVER works. Look up "ladder theory" on the web and learn about it. It's amusing and very true. The first anon girl is completely wrong, which is amusing considering she probably knows better. Far from throwing out ANY chance, dating someone else and making them happy makes you MORE attractive to a girl. Do you think most women say "no WAY I'd be with Brad Pitt--he's dated Angelina Jolie!" Aaaaahhhhh NO!

    It sounds like you don't have a shot with 1 right now because you KNOW she's tossed you in the friendzone. You're options are to date other people or to take a shot her. You can always take a shot with her and then move on to the next girl, but you'll get absolutely nowhere if you wait. That's a trap that FAR too many good guys your age have fallen into. Learn EARLY to avoid it and you'll be WAY ahead of the game.

    • Yeah, not good advice coming from Anon girl. Quadraphonic is spot on. Listen, worst case just take a shot at girl 1, and if she shoots you down date other girls. I think even Anon girl could agree with that! Waiting around is unbelievably stupid. All you'll do is try to "develop" her feelings over time and she'll just end up with a guy who interests her the first time she meets him. Long projects in romance always fail. This ain't a movie.

    • That article she linked is a good one, but step 3 is HUGELY important. People like things that other people like. Period. That holds for people too. If she sees you have other options it WILL make you more attractive. This is ESPECIALLY important with hot girls since they are used to guys fawning over them and they aren't used to seeing them favor another girl. People don't value what they can get easily. That's where so many guys fail with hot girls.

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What Girls Said 3

  • I didn't vote. Honestly, you just never know what will happen! From my experience and from what I have noticed is that people pick the "dream" and then when the fantasy wears off, it isn't so much of a dream anymore. Or, it only lasts a short while (and you get your heart broken). Then, you had a great girl that may actually have been "perfect" for you (not perfect, but perfect for you) and you let her go.

    Everyone wants the dream. :-) I guess, talk to number one (get some courage). See what her reaction is, then take the next step (go with 2 or if 1 accepts - there you go). Yep, get some courage.

    It's like saying you have to choose between two jobs. One is a dream job and the other is a good job with great benefits , etc. but you haven't even applied yet.

  • r you sure girl 1 don't have any feelings for u? if yes .. just go for girl 2 .. who knows how things will turn out .. a lot of people ended up falling for their partners even though these partners weren't what they dreamt of .. !

  • First, if girl one does like you, she will be heartbroken when you date someone else. You will throw out ANY chance with her if you date girl two.

    Second, it's not fair to girl two if she only gets to be second choice. Let some guy who finds her as his dream girl get her.

    Why don't you think you won't date girl one any time soon?

    • About a year ago, Girl 1 and I were "dates" for a couple of functions/parties. I read into it too much, things got awkward, and we established that we would just be friends. So I backed off and things got fun again, but I just can't get over this nagging affection I have for her.

    • Show All
    • I think you are looking at this from a female perspective, meaning how a guy would react to a girl who dates other people even though she said she wants him. Yeah, we get pissed and then move on. But with women, I've seen it work the way I'm saying, with friends. But you probably have too. I guess it's really down to the person.

    • I'm a female, I don't see things from a male perspective, so how can I mess the two up?

      Sure, you may know women who are like that, but they are probably control freaks and angry that they lost you. Females can get really jealous. However, it doesn't mean that she cares, it just means that she wants you to still be whipped for her.

      I would be really hurt if a guy who I thought liked me and who I liked dated another girl. I wouldn't ever want to date him, because I wouldn't trust him.

What Guys Said 4

  • I don't mean this to be condescending, but at your age you're best off dating whomever you can. Right now it's just practice for later when relationships get really life-alteringly serious. I'm just putting it out there.

    Anyway, to answer your question, I would date girl 2 and make sure 1 knows about it (subtly, don't just tell her, let her see you 2 together). Girl 1 is beautiful and knows it. There's nothing you can say that she hasn't heard before. The only thing you can give her that she hasn't had before is a guy who isn't going to melt instantly for her. Be her friend, be 100% awesome, and date the girl who will treat you like a king. All of this makes you look incredibly attractive to girl 1.

  • Well you don't see yourself being with girl 1 romantically so you've already given us your answer.


  • Whichever you want to be with. If your dream girl is who you want, go for her. If you're just trying to date whoever will be with you/can get, don't gate

  • If you're sure it'll be a long time before you can be with girl 1, then go with girl 2.