For the first date, if a friend of hers got us together, then definitely a couple's date, so she feels safe, and comfortable meeting me for the first time!! I can only imagine how some women might be nervous, meeting a guy, alone, even in public, for a first date, without a BFF to be there, and maybe step in, if something, whatever, as you maybe imagine or fear!! LOL!! :) After the first date, I prefer being with her, just us, so I can focus on getting to know her, and what she likes, and how she smiles, and reacts to things I say.
I'd imagine a combo. 1on1 first, so we know where we stand. Is there anything there? Is is mutual even. Try to touch on the intullectual depths. And then loosen it up with friends and really getting to know them, like, get to see the SO's behavior with their friends, get that other side.
But then that sounds like a dreamlike scenario. That would have to be preset like shit. That doesn't happen at all like that irl. Does it? Im entierly outside the datingmarket. Damaged. So I don't really know, all I have is my mind.
Thank you.☺ Yeah people don't notice my inexperience until I actually try to learn something. I can make up for a lot of my inexperience by "researching" and asking friends for their experiences. As long as I stay grounded and openminded to consider all the angles it seems people are satisfied with both awnsers and conversational advice.
OlderAndWiser | 9.5K opinions shared on Dating topic.
Influencer
1 y
I didn't start dating frequently until I was 20 years old. At that age, I had no peers who were doing group dating, do I have always done one-on-one dates.
I do not want to get in that male competition thing about who has the slickest punch lines to make himself look cool and the other guy like an idiot. Not sure how anyone can feel like it is less tension? Maybe the top-looking contenders enjoy sitting back and watching the members of the other gender compete for their attention? I rather want to get to know the woman I am dating and if I like her I am willing to talk about emotions and very personal subjects I might not want other people to listen in on. I really hate small talk. That is ok in order to get a conversation started. But with lots of people around competing for romantic partners, conversation will remain on that imbecile level all evening. My opinion may also reflect cultural differences in ideas about dating. Until recent years, here in Germany, we had another word for "group dates": We used to call them "parties".
The scenario that I imagined is more of some sort of combination of mutual friends - maybe an additional person or two from someone she knows, or you know. The other guy certainly doesn't have to be competition. But if it was a girl friend of hers, and she brought her date, then yes, I guess that guy is a stranger to you, who is doing who-knows-what to entertain, puff up his feathers, etc. (But he could instead be your best friend, for ex.)
But for different reasons, I'm more with you. I have always been a one-on-one person. I give people my full focus, and I enjoy that particular dynamic most. I've never asked my friends and bfs to consciously commingle. It can happen, but it's never something I tried to orchestrate/suggested, ever. Unless the relationship goes on for years, and he is getting bored and likes the others as well, then maybe. I am also not one to spend the day away, or go on some trip, and 'check in' all the time. I'll talk a lot when I get back. I don't enjoy or believe in all the mundane logistical talk. People should just have some experiences, and then maybe share later. New experiences, or separate experiences, are good to change the patterns and routine.
Anyway. Yeah, I don't need any other opinions on who the person is. I can make my mind up on my own, always have. I trust my own judgement. Plus, it's just sort of hard to find a foursome that all like each other equally enough.
One on one for the first 3 dates at least. I once had a girl ask me do our second date with a group “of her friends” and I flat out asked her “is this so they can analyze me?” She responded “yeah”’.
That’s wasn’t fair to me at all. I proposed a second date one on one. She first said yes and then later canceled it.
Whatever. I didn’t like her paranoid over-analysis. It’s not like I asked her to come straight to my bed on the first or second date. I just wanted to something one on one yet fun publicly.
Wow, this made me... what is the word for it... exhale, groan, I don't think there is a word, actually. That is just wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong. Yeah, it would be a shame to waste any more time with a girl like that. She's the epitome of 'hive mind.' Good riddens.
I often hear about women complaining about horrible dates and bad relationships. Well welcome to the f*cking club. I’ve have enough bad experiences to make 5 mytakes but I don’t get ultra paranoid when I go on a date with a girl.
As long as its public the risk of the female getting hard is slim to none. She was in no danger with me.
Jamie05rhs | 4.6K opinions shared on Dating topic.
Master
1 y
I don't mind either. But if it's a group date, you better actually tell me it's a date. Because otherwise I won't know. One time I went out with some friends and one of the girls was someone who I actually had a crush on. But the situation was awkward because I didn't really know why I was there or what I was doing. To this day I don't know if they set me up or if it was just a coincidence.
Yeah that's awkward. Some people do that so it's less pressure, it either happens or doesn't happen organically. And maybe some are not that good with communication, and aren't direct, so they don't know how to do proper set-up and introductions. And maybe some are doing it surreptitiously to see what happens, like an experiment only they're in on. On all of it... shudder.
One on one dates to start then going on double dates with friends after. I prefer more intimacy. Also it can be hard to shine unless you are given a fair chance to show yourself. When it's just two people, they will both have the chance to talk and meeting in groups after can enhance what you already have with the person you are dating
I can't seem to get it right in one on ones. Somehow unless she's already into me before the date it's hard to be interesting enough. In groups however I often tend to shine really bright. I'm the noticable head usually so I'd say i can easily catch someone's eye that way. But he down side is unless we're alone and it's quite the date will only be a talking one.
They both have their place. A group thing allows new acquaintances to meet without the pressure of heavy romance. It can be a foray for blind dates to meet each other around friend
The one on one dates are good for those who want the privacy and higher levels of intimacy and romance
I prefer one on one dates. I'm already awkward being with a group of friends, and I feel like just leaving because it becomes too much (I'm an introvert).. being only with my partner would make me feel more like myself.
I like group dates bc it seems everytime I go on a one on one date, the guy tries to get me to go home w him after and it's very uncomfortable I also like social guys, so the dynamic he has in the group speaks volumes about his character
Group dates can. Be a great way to break the ice with someone you like. The down. Side is. your date hitting it off with a person in the group. I had 2 or 3 couple dates for food and drinks that ended up with the couples all in a room having sex. Good times
React
Like
Helpful
Funny
Disagree
2 People
Reply
1truekhaleesi | 363 opinions shared on Dating topic.
Guru
1 y
When you start dating someone, one on one is best. If you can't handle a one on one date with a person, you probably aren't compatible. Once you've been dating a while, group dates can be fun.
meetkitty123 | 222 opinions shared on Dating topic.
Guru
1 y
I want to get to know the person. Groups cause a distraction. If its a first date I just make sure we meet in a well public open area but where we can sit together and talk.
Groups are more of a okay i like this person but things are completely awkward between us soo let's bring the girls or let's bring the boys to lighten the mood... for me... groups are a no go, but for others, if it works, good for you.
Most Helpful Guys