My best friend evidently likes me too, yet still doesn't want to date. What are my options?

So after much hinting and back and forth over 4 years, all it took was an epic breakup with a girl who'd been cheating on me the entire time for my best friend to come forward and (basically) straight up tell me that she did like me, she just doesn't have time to date anyone.

As she put it, all the stuff she'd said a while back was true (she'd been trashed that night and told me she wanted to date, but swore she 'couldn't remember' the next day). But she wants to graduate more than anything right now, and she simply doesn't have time for all the bits and pieces of an actual relationship.

I didn't know what to say to her. I've more than half liked this girl for years but always believed she wasn't interested and looked elsewhere (heck I'd asked her out a year ago and she'd told me she had no time to date anyone, which I guess is the straight up truth, not some 'not interested' lie).

What can I do now?


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • It doesn't sound like there is anything you can do. She likes you but doesn't want to be in a relationship because she wants to focus on school. You could wait for her, or move on. It's a very tricky situation though. =/


What Guys Said 1

  • How long is it until she graduates? How long did she say she's been into you?

    You can either wait for her or move on. I could be 100% wrong here (girls, give me your opinions), but if I decided to wait for her, I wouldn't let her know that that's the route I decided to take. Don't make yourself too available (I think I picked up that phrase from some movie that referenced "He's Just Not That Into You," but I can't put my finger on it right now). If she's liked you for a while, and she's not going to date anybody at all until she graduates (she said she's too busy to be in a relationship), she'll still be available when she's ready. She wanted you when you weren't available - why risk messing things up? If you don't express a lot of interest, she'll still want you in the meantime. Letting her know how you feel about her might just give her time to think about whether or not she really wants you and change her mind. I dunno.

    If you take that route and she does end up dating another guy, you can just spill your guts and tell her that you've been into her all those years and that you waited, but you were afraid to let her know because you thought you might ruin your chances.

    Right now, it sounds like she wants you, but she just can't have you right now. From what you said, it sounds like you can just wait it out and you've got it made.

    • Zombieland! That was an awesome movie. Also, please get second opinions on this. My answer was just a thought.