Is taking a few days to respond to being asked out bad?

[zeitgeist057]

No, it's not bad. It's just a good way of letting me know you're not that interested. I'm all about mutual consent, so I lose interest when someone shows me they are not interested in me.

I wouldn't call that "bad". To me, it's a good thing to let me know subtly not to waste my time or hers. Girls often have a difficult time being direct, they even give their number out to people they are not interested in hearing from because they can't handle just saying "no" (lack of confidence, fear, and other fear-based motivations). So a subtle "soft no" sign like this is helpful.

[Anon621]

In my opinion no. You have to consider everyone makes decisions on their own terms. You have no idea what the other person you are interested is currently doing right now unless you know them extremely well which at the early stage of romance is usually rare. Everyone has different situations it honestly depends the person you are interested in. You could be interested in a single parent raising X amount ot kids who currently quit their job to go back to school. That's just an example of multiple possible scenarios. I dont think people should feel discouraged if it takes the person you like to respond after a few days. In my opinion, if you really like them that much, would 48 to 72 hours really kill you? Some people might say yes I can't wait that long but in my opinion if you are really invested in the other person you will have to learn patience eventually.

[DizzyDesii]

Im tired of people playing that odd “make him/her wait game.” I’ll be on to the next by then and you should be too. If you reeeeally like her then sure, stay and continue playing her game. But i dont have time for people like that who waste time. I understand a couple mins to respond, maybe even some hours. But days? she's not worthy of your interest. she's either talking to someone else and debating breaking it off with them first, OR some idiot friend told her to make you wait and work for her attention OR she's totally fangirling and has fainted somewhere

[AmandaYVR]

She's calculating something. Who knows what that is.
I'd tell you 'girls be crazy', but unfortunately it's just all humans. They're inscrutable.

[coachTanthony]

3 days to respond... did she say yes? If so WTF cares then.

[ManOnFire]

And what was her answer?

[Kiss_Me]

Possibly. Did she say yes?

It sounds like she is either busy or has another guy consuming her time. Go on the second date, but let her know you are dating other women. You are NOT exclusive. (Date other people by the way) If she is quality girlfriend material, she will eventually be the only one BOTH of you want to see.

[hahahmm]

If you want a relationship that is traditional in any way then yes, it's bad that she took 3 days to respond.

If you're okay with her being disrespectful to you and maybe even bringing Chad on the second date & french kissing him right in front of you, go for it.

[MrNameless]

There could be something going on in her life.. Doesn't sound like you were a priority at that moment. If she responds promptly after and continues to talk to you and make plans, then keep trying. Otherwise if you keep getting these spaced out replies that take +1 days, move on

[CasKimchi]

I use to be in the military. Dating was hard. When your stressed out, depressed, confused, and exhausted, responding to messages almost seem like a chore. But at the end of the day I would at least try to respond, if i really liked you I would still make that effort even if I suddenly pass out after the first message at least I’m trying. 3 damn days lmao, either she physically is unable to message you or you should just give up.

[Espresso-Grande]

Some people don't want to come across as desperate or too eager. So they'll wait before responding. I've heard some people say they actually do that even though they're interested. Personally, I'd respond the same day, as soon as I could. It's a putoff when people don't show eagerness to see you again.

[MuffinBoi]

I can understand someone not responding for a few hours. We all have lives to get on with, so fair enough. But unless they have a high ranking position at a company or went camping/hiking for a few days, then there's no way that they were busy enough to not reply for 3 days.

Side Question: Did they say Yes or No to the date?

[Angel_123]

i need help the guy cut me off 9 months ago emailed me askinf for my snap and i asked for his instead so he hasn't replied on email for like 1 week so i cut him of proper bad and said “ i think best if we dont talk” and called him a boi lol I don't know why he even fickin email me

[4eyes2mouths]

It's pretty rude and inconsiderate. If she was very serious about it then she would set the 20 seconds aside to reply to you. Also if she had to figure out her plans she should have told you that.

[MAC1983]

Never. It is it almost always, with few toxic exception, a very mature, specially emotionally, thing to do...

Would you say so, asker?

[honestGUY45]

Could've been waiting to see if something else panned out and maybe it fell through. Could've been testing to see how willing you are to lie in wait, like a doormat. I just don't think it's because they're busy or shy. They already got through the first date. That should've made it easy to decide on a second one. I wouldn't put much stock in this one.

[TruthBringer]

She isn't interested. Move on. If a woman is interested in you, she wouldn't leave you wondering. This girl you asked out is clearly cowering away from you asking her out. Cut your losses and find yourself a girl who IS interested.

[Zealashton]

hmmm. not sure, i think of that qestion l, a job interview

[Flower7]

Yes, that is a long time and gives of the impression of having a lack of interest.

[guesswhoseback]

Yeah if someone doesn’t get back to you within 24 hours they intentionally disregarded that text. This is a sign of low interest level. I wouldn’t initiate contact again

[SoapySandwich]

The response will tell you more than the time taken. If their response is "I would love to go out with you" then that isn't bad. Also how long after it was read is more important than how long in total.

[lifelearner011]

It's not wrong. She's probably a busy person. Don't take it personally! :)

[Dargil]

Yes, it is bad. She should at least responded: "Things going on. Let me get back to you." as a place holder. The delay shows ambivalence. One day is fine and then I would withdraw the invitation.

[sheikalana]

I mean if it took her 3 days to see your message I wouldn't be worried about it. It happens people get busy and for some their phones are not a priority. However, if she's ignoring you or playing hard to get that's a bit immature.