IS THIS A RED FLAG?

Question

So I've been seeing this guy for about 2 months now and he's funny, intelligent all the good things... There's jus one issue he's in debt, crippling debt can't buy food sometimes bad**(he's a teacher and cuz of this debt he only gets less than 3hundred frm his salary).. thats still not a deal breaker because everyone goes through tough times right? .. now i jus found out about this yesterday and in the same breath he's telling me this, he asks if i can take a small loan on my name so that he can pay off the over whelming amount of friends he owes... Then suggests if i can still give him a little bit frm my salary every month so he can get by... now i dont have an issues with helping him but wow... my question is..
Is this a cue for me to leave? Or should i wait help and see where this goes?

Answer 1

GingerGuy | 5.1K opinions shared on Dating topic.

Master

It's one thing to be in debt, it's another to ask someone that you basically just started dating to give you money. That is a "red flag" for sure. As guys, we are always "warned" about this, if a woman asks for money, so it's no different for you. Now, if it were me, depending on how much you like him and how persistent he's been about this so far? I'd simply say that you're really sorry he's struggling, but at this point you can't help him (that's it) and see how he responds to that. If that's fine and he understands and drops it, perfect. That's how he should react. Anything else, goodbye!

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1 Person

GingerGuy

1 y
And I just re-read this, he's not only asking you for money, but to take out a loan!! That's not acceptable. And who would ever ask someone they just started dating to take out a loan for them? Huge red flag.

Answer 2

GingerGuy

And I just re-read this, he's not only asking you for money, but to take out a loan!! That's not acceptable. And who would ever ask someone they just started dating to take out a loan for them? Huge red flag.

Answer 3

magiusX26 | 1.8K opinions shared on Dating topic.

Guru

teachers have it extremrly hard right now thanks to covid so very likely its not an issue of poor money managenent. so with that in mind, see about maybe helping him out.

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1 Person

Dinklex3

1 y
A guy she's been seeing for 2 months is asking her to take a loan in her name so he can pay back "friends" and you say help him?
Lmao
magiusX26

1 y
he has gotten all the help he can from other friends and likely maxed out on loans too. then was embarassed to tell her. only asking as a last resort. i could be wrong of course but it has that kind of feel to it.
magiusX26

1 y
oh and it seems you did not fully read my original reply because i said "see about maybe helping him out" which indicates investigating further and buy him some groceries or some such. am concerned he asked her to get a lian though.

Answer 4

Dinklex3

A guy she's been seeing for 2 months is asking her to take a loan in her name so he can pay back "friends" and you say help him?
Lmao

Answer 5

magiusX26

he has gotten all the help he can from other friends and likely maxed out on loans too. then was embarassed to tell her. only asking as a last resort. i could be wrong of course but it has that kind of feel to it.

Answer 6

magiusX26

oh and it seems you did not fully read my original reply because i said "see about maybe helping him out" which indicates investigating further and buy him some groceries or some such. am concerned he asked her to get a lian though.

Answer 7

DoItMatterTho

Xper 2

Honey. Run.

Run very, very fast.

Just 2 months and a grown adult is asking you to take out a loan AND financially support him? I think not.

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2 People

Answer 8

TheFlak38 | 2.8K opinions shared on Dating topic.

Master

This guy stinks. Something's not right and I guess he doesn't tell you the whole story. Where did this debt come from? It was definitely his own fuck up.

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