What attractive non-personal trait is more appealing?

Question

I know it's hard to pick one, but which of these non-personal traits (or, non-defining attributes that someone can obtain, regardless of their personality) is likely one of the first things you find attractive, or that you seem to gravitate to when you notice someone or are looking for someone?

Plays a musical instrument rather well

Athleticism / Plays a sport (regularly and rather well)

Is artistic (painting, drawing, sculpting, pottery, writing, etc.)

Well educated/cultured and can speak more than one language fluently

Can cook and mix drinks rather well

Select age and gender to cast your vote:

GirlGuy

Answer 1

YourFutureEx | 717 opinions shared on Dating topic.

Master

I'm glad these traits are being admired in the generation where looks are the only thing that will get you a "right swipe".

Learning to play music is one of my six major goals in life. Not just learning, but excelling in it and I'm sure that I will as I'm really good with my fingers 😉
I don't play a sport, but I workout every single day and I do yoga. I am a fitness enthusiast who not only loves to stay fit but wants to learn "how" to be fit and I love watching sports.
I have won the prize for the best artist of my class. Every single year. (Painting)
I'm educated. I can speak 2 languages and 1 dialect. And I'll learn two more by the end of the next year. (Bonus: all four languages have different scripts)
I don't cook. But I'm learning these days. I asked my mom to teach me basic stuff so that when I'll start living alone, I'll be able to make 5-6 different dishes for my survival. I can always hire a maid, but having a skill as necessary as cooking makes you a better person.

But... Why did I tell you all that? Because... I fucking love the people who are more than just their looks. I am learning all of the things you mentioned because I know their worth. Having at least one of these qualities (or something that sort of) is a must for a girl if she wants to be my partner. Talent is absolutely required to make me admire her enough to be standing with me holding my hand. I don't want a 10/10 pretty face if she can't do anything else outside of the bedroom. Gimme an 8/10 who has done enough hard work, who's been through enough in her life to offer something to this world. I don't want a trophy to put in my showcase, I want a tool that is functional.

Another reason why I mentioned this is that I appreciate each of these things equally. I am doing pretty much all of them so it explains that they hold pretty much similar value to me (but I'll admit cooking is more important lol, I don't want to die). I don't want to say "oh so you're a dancer? That's great but I like that girl more because she's a singer. Oh wait, that third girl is into sports? I'm sorry, Ms. Singer, I value that sporty girl more, c ya!" NOOO. All three girls are equally exciting. These girls are way better than like the 90% of the women across the world because let's face it, most of the women have nothing really to offer. In fact not just women, but human beings in general. Yeah they can do a job, but with a lethargic face and disinterested motivation? They have no talent or skill and even if they had, they have buried it long ago. (Like I buried my artistic talent as I though it's not going to feed me in life, but as I grew up, I realized that thigs like these have more to offer than just money).

So yeah, I cannot vote.

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3 People

Ozanne

1 y
Wonderful, thoughtful answer. :) It's exactly about finding attractiveness that has nothing to do with physical looks. While I love musicians, a lot of guys criticize that a girl's love for musicians has to do with money - as in all they're in to are millionaire rockstars. Not true. I remember a guy in college who was a huge nerd, but one night at our department's open house, he brought his guitar and played and sang. We were all thinking, "What the hell?" He was awesome. His cool points went up. His sexiness points went up. He suddenly had the girls flocking around him. Yet he was a broke guy in college living on a student loan. I mean, come on. Money? You're kidding me.

It doesn't matter if the person has any money or is wildly famous. If they have a defining trait that sets them apart from others, it is extremely attractive.

One of my exes (a musician, surprise, surprise) eventually met and married a ballerina. It was one of the things he loved about her the most.

I think they are an automatic message to someone that if you get involved, right away your relationship is going to be interesting. :)
YourFutureEx

1 y
Personality, skill and hardwork. These are the three gems in a human being that makes him invaluable. Nothing is sexier than that. Neither money, nor looks. The best thing is that you can work on these things. You can learn and earn them. And they're very rewarding. Not just socially but it gives personal satisfaction.
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I'm sure the girls who went nuts after seeing him play, have totally changed their outlook on his nerdiness. They'll start finding it sexy and explain his nerdiness as "a mysterious guy with simple yet classy fashion sense, who doesn't need attention of others as he is always chilling in his own company, working hard by studying his books, got his shit together 😍 💦"
That happens when you do what others can't. Your flaws become your style, your cool factor, a statement.
---
And such couples are goals. He will play and she'll dance. I wish that I get someone who can sing so that when I'll play, she'll provide the vocals. They become so complementary.
---
Do you have any skill/trait?

Answer 2

Ozanne

Wonderful, thoughtful answer. :) It's exactly about finding attractiveness that has nothing to do with physical looks. While I love musicians, a lot of guys criticize that a girl's love for musicians has to do with money - as in all they're in to are millionaire rockstars. Not true. I remember a guy in college who was a huge nerd, but one night at our department's open house, he brought his guitar and played and sang. We were all thinking, "What the hell?" He was awesome. His cool points went up. His sexiness points went up. He suddenly had the girls flocking around him. Yet he was a broke guy in college living on a student loan. I mean, come on. Money? You're kidding me.

It doesn't matter if the person has any money or is wildly famous. If they have a defining trait that sets them apart from others, it is extremely attractive.

One of my exes (a musician, surprise, surprise) eventually met and married a ballerina. It was one of the things he loved about her the most.

I think they are an automatic message to someone that if you get involved, right away your relationship is going to be interesting. :)

Answer 3

YourFutureEx

Personality, skill and hardwork. These are the three gems in a human being that makes him invaluable. Nothing is sexier than that. Neither money, nor looks. The best thing is that you can work on these things. You can learn and earn them. And they're very rewarding. Not just socially but it gives personal satisfaction.
---
I'm sure the girls who went nuts after seeing him play, have totally changed their outlook on his nerdiness. They'll start finding it sexy and explain his nerdiness as "a mysterious guy with simple yet classy fashion sense, who doesn't need attention of others as he is always chilling in his own company, working hard by studying his books, got his shit together 😍 💦"
That happens when you do what others can't. Your flaws become your style, your cool factor, a statement.
---
And such couples are goals. He will play and she'll dance. I wish that I get someone who can sing so that when I'll play, she'll provide the vocals. They become so complementary.
---
Do you have any skill/trait?

Answer 4

spartan55 | 2.2K opinions shared on Dating topic.

Master

I would gravitate towards two of the five, maybe because I have no talent for them whatsoever? Anyway, being able to play a musical instrument, or having any sort of artistic/ creative talent are both very attractive in a woman.

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1 Person

Ozanne

1 y
I tend to agree. A guy who can play music is amazingly attractive.
spartan55

1 y
@Ozanne
Do you think the attraction is tied to the inability to do it yourself? Or do you have musical talent, so you are attracted to those with similar talent?
Ozanne

1 y
I can play guitar and sing, but I don't think I impress someone with some radical skills or anything. When I see someone who is very comfortable playing guitar, or piano, or drums and they just seem to rattle away at it without thinking as if it's nothing, that's pretty sexy.

Answer 5

Ozanne

I tend to agree. A guy who can play music is amazingly attractive.

Answer 6

spartan55

@Ozanne
Do you think the attraction is tied to the inability to do it yourself? Or do you have musical talent, so you are attracted to those with similar talent?

Answer 7

Ozanne

I can play guitar and sing, but I don't think I impress someone with some radical skills or anything. When I see someone who is very comfortable playing guitar, or piano, or drums and they just seem to rattle away at it without thinking as if it's nothing, that's pretty sexy.

Answer 8

TacosRAwesome | 4.1K opinions shared on Dating topic.

Master

I'm going with D because cultured people are usually interesting people.

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1 Person

Answer 9

Unit1 | 2K opinions shared on Dating topic.

Master

Making the money! What attractive non-personal trait is more appealing?

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Answer 10

TheUniqueOne96 | 1.6K opinions shared on Dating topic.

Guru

Can cook and mix drinks rather well.

I don't care too much about the latter, but the ability to cook is useful.

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1 Person

What attractive non-personal trait is more appealing?

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