My boyfriend wants to break up because I won't video chat with him, is this even fair?

Question

We are in a long distance relationship. I do not like video chatting. However, I do not mind driving 13 hours to see him. I just never have been into video chatting anyone not even family. Am I wrong? he's like obsessed with video chatting. Can't even have a convo without him mentioning it.

Answer 1

Ozanne | 446 opinions shared on Dating topic.

Guru

If you're in a relationship and someone is pressuring you to do something you don't want to do, it's them in the wrong. I get that guys are visual and though women are too, it seems they put more stock in to it than we do. I'm sure you've told him to knock it off, and now you're at this result: he wants to break up.

It sounds like he is not making any effort to see the other things of value to keep you together. If this is worth breaking up with you over, imagine how he'd react if more serious issues were to happen between you both.

I think he's doing you a favour. How long were you really willing to go on like this? But what do I know? If he's so worth hanging on to, then maybe you ought to talk about the future and who is going to be moving where so you can be together. If that's also not an option, again, how long do you want to live apart for? - especially with him badgering you the whole time about being on a video call with him?

Asker

23 d
I didn't want to mention this but he is serving a life sentence. Im willing to sacrifice my life to be with him and see him every month. He's not willing to sacrifice a video chat for just the moment until I am comfortable enough to do it? That seems unfair to me.
Ozanne

23 d
Well, first you have to recognize that you're involved with someone who doesn't understand what fair is on many levels. If this is what you're prepared to sign up for, then be prepared that he is this type of person he is. Unless you both have access to some kind of relationship counsellor while he's incarcerated, it's doubtful he's going to understand why you should have your way while you have your freedoms. Maybe there is some way you can compromise, such as video chatting only once every week or two? If you just can't handle it, then unfortunately you're going to need to find creative new ways to get him to stop pestering you about it, because video-chats are here to stay, and he'll likely be bothering you with it for as long as he's there.
Asker

23 d
Well he broke up with me. Why would he tell me to block him? I said no and he said he suggests I do. I mean can't he just block me? Thats weird. Is he testing me or what?
Show All Show Less
Ozanne

22 d
You mean since you posted your Question, he's broken up with you? Good grief. I don't even know what to say. Yes of course he can block you, but it's your own business who you block, it's not up to him or anyone else. I don't know... it just sounds like you should leave it alone and not play his game. Be the better person here, and send the message that these games don't work with you. I mean obviously I'd like to see you leave the guy and move on and yes, even block him, but at the very best you can be the more mature, and better person and not be subjected to games. He's not your boss or your father. You don't need to tolerate someone being so pushy and obnoxious about what they expect of you to do. If you're now officially an ex, then be one. :)

Answer 2

Asker

I didn't want to mention this but he is serving a life sentence. Im willing to sacrifice my life to be with him and see him every month. He's not willing to sacrifice a video chat for just the moment until I am comfortable enough to do it? That seems unfair to me.

Answer 3

Ozanne

Well, first you have to recognize that you're involved with someone who doesn't understand what fair is on many levels. If this is what you're prepared to sign up for, then be prepared that he is this type of person he is. Unless you both have access to some kind of relationship counsellor while he's incarcerated, it's doubtful he's going to understand why you should have your way while you have your freedoms. Maybe there is some way you can compromise, such as video chatting only once every week or two? If you just can't handle it, then unfortunately you're going to need to find creative new ways to get him to stop pestering you about it, because video-chats are here to stay, and he'll likely be bothering you with it for as long as he's there.

Answer 4

Asker

Well he broke up with me. Why would he tell me to block him? I said no and he said he suggests I do. I mean can't he just block me? Thats weird. Is he testing me or what?

Answer 5

Ozanne

You mean since you posted your Question, he's broken up with you? Good grief. I don't even know what to say. Yes of course he can block you, but it's your own business who you block, it's not up to him or anyone else. I don't know... it just sounds like you should leave it alone and not play his game. Be the better person here, and send the message that these games don't work with you. I mean obviously I'd like to see you leave the guy and move on and yes, even block him, but at the very best you can be the more mature, and better person and not be subjected to games. He's not your boss or your father. You don't need to tolerate someone being so pushy and obnoxious about what they expect of you to do. If you're now officially an ex, then be one. :)

Answer 6

Anonymous

You can't compromise and video chat sometimes? It obviously means a lot to him. Its not like he's asking you to do anything terribly hard.

Answer 7

Anonymous

He should break up with you and get a real girlfriend.

Answer 8

KrakenAttackin | 1.2K opinions shared on Dating topic.

Yoda

Fair has nothing to do with it.

My boyfriend wants to break up because I won't video chat with him, is this even fair?

AI Bot Choice

Most Helpful Girl

What Girls & Guys Said

Related myTakes