Do you feel unloved in your relationship?

Question

I've been on a few dates with this girl and I have to say, she's not really a big flirt and I kind of feel unappreciated/unloved. We've only been on two dates, but have talked on the phone several times now for at least an hour at a time. My dating experience is a bit limited for my age so I don't know maybe i'm just a bit impatient. It's only been about 1.5 months that we've known one another for. I don't think she doesn't like me it's just that maybe she's not very affectionate? I'm just so used to being more flirty/teasing with other girls in the past.

Answer 1

btbc92 | 4.5K opinions shared on Dating topic.

Master

When girls flirt and tease its part of manipulation and sex. That's it. It doesn't mean they like you or love you per se. If they did, you wouldn't be dating her, you would be with the women who did that to you. Here you have a woman who is different in how she expresses love now you can't appreciate it. That's where the experience gets you. If you feel she isn't good for you, move on. Maybe you too are not compatible. I am not like that either. And is why I am celibate myself also. Bceuase men don't appreciate love anymore. They want sensuality and sex. Plus only 2 dates? What is the rush? You two just met each other. It's just sexual wants with you and those women. She isn't that person if she is like that. That also means you have to work harder to be the kind of man she needs or prove that. If you can't, again, move on.

red324

14 d
So it's a good thing she's not flirty? We have nice long conversations about anything and everything and I think we're a great match both looks and personality wise. So what you're saying is the ones that are flirty are probably not the serious long term type of girls?
red324

14 d
This is going to sound weird, but when I was 9 or 10 years old I dreamed up a girl just like her that I would hopefully meet and be with one day and stay together for many many years. It wasn't until now that I realized I finally ran into that person.
btbc92

14 d
"So it's a good thing she's not flirty?" YEP. Because honest and loving women don't see the need to fake something they naturally feel. Most girls do it because of hormones, feelings, and emotions involved that aren't logical. And then when you do something to upset her, her feelings change. Leaving much room for unhappiness and miscommunication.

"We have nice long conversations about anything and everything and I think we're a great match both looks and personality wise. So what you're saying is the ones that are flirty are probably not the serious long term type of girls?" They usually aren't. It doesn't mean they may not want to. But they often don't know how to keep them, which is why they usually end up with different guys and still aren't happy. Many need to mature in order to really understand that relationships aren't about that. if you love each other, it comes naturally.

"This is going to sound weird, but when I was 9 or 10 years old I dreamed up a girl just like her that I would hopefully meet and be with one day and stay together for many many years. It wasn't until now that I realized I finally ran into that person." Nothing weird about it. Sometimes people know and find people who maybe God shows you to strive to find. If she is that person, take care of her. Before you lose her. Girls like that are ONCE in a life time. They go as quickly as they come. The same for men like that. I was told I am that myself. But I don't know. Suffered a lot of heartache and hell. I don't see the point. But if that is what you two want, and nothing is wrong, why sabotage a good thing? If it ain't broken don't fix it.
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red324

14 d
How often do you think I should schedule dates? I want to say she's a fairly independent woman so I don't want to become too much for her and scare her off. I'm also fairly independent and appreciate my alone time, so I'm cool with a date every couple weeks. We just had a date last Monday and I feel like we just had it, so I don't really feel like arranging another date until like the end of this coming week.
btbc92

14 d
Just TALK to her. You're dating her so you need to communicate that and ask her those questions and tell her what you need in order to be happy in a relationship and learn more about her. That's a RELATIONSHIP. Even a friendship has this. I can't give you the answers, because I'm not dating you.
red324

14 d
That sure is one interesting perspective. That's one of the things i've noticed about her is she's totally herself and doesn't have a fake personality. The best part is she's a total goof ball and literally has no idea how funny she is because she's just being her.
btbc92

14 d
Yeah. She's probably similar to my personality type. Look up INFJ or INFP. But she may be ISFP/ISFJ.

Answer 2

red324

So it's a good thing she's not flirty? We have nice long conversations about anything and everything and I think we're a great match both looks and personality wise. So what you're saying is the ones that are flirty are probably not the serious long term type of girls?

Answer 3

red324

This is going to sound weird, but when I was 9 or 10 years old I dreamed up a girl just like her that I would hopefully meet and be with one day and stay together for many many years. It wasn't until now that I realized I finally ran into that person.

Answer 4

btbc92

"So it's a good thing she's not flirty?" YEP. Because honest and loving women don't see the need to fake something they naturally feel. Most girls do it because of hormones, feelings, and emotions involved that aren't logical. And then when you do something to upset her, her feelings change. Leaving much room for unhappiness and miscommunication.

"We have nice long conversations about anything and everything and I think we're a great match both looks and personality wise. So what you're saying is the ones that are flirty are probably not the serious long term type of girls?" They usually aren't. It doesn't mean they may not want to. But they often don't know how to keep them, which is why they usually end up with different guys and still aren't happy. Many need to mature in order to really understand that relationships aren't about that. if you love each other, it comes naturally.

"This is going to sound weird, but when I was 9 or 10 years old I dreamed up a girl just like her that I would hopefully meet and be with one day and stay together for many many years. It wasn't until now that I realized I finally ran into that person." Nothing weird about it. Sometimes people know and find people who maybe God shows you to strive to find. If she is that person, take care of her. Before you lose her. Girls like that are ONCE in a life time. They go as quickly as they come. The same for men like that. I was told I am that myself. But I don't know. Suffered a lot of heartache and hell. I don't see the point. But if that is what you two want, and nothing is wrong, why sabotage a good thing? If it ain't broken don't fix it.

Answer 5

red324

How often do you think I should schedule dates? I want to say she's a fairly independent woman so I don't want to become too much for her and scare her off. I'm also fairly independent and appreciate my alone time, so I'm cool with a date every couple weeks. We just had a date last Monday and I feel like we just had it, so I don't really feel like arranging another date until like the end of this coming week.

Answer 6

btbc92

Just TALK to her. You're dating her so you need to communicate that and ask her those questions and tell her what you need in order to be happy in a relationship and learn more about her. That's a RELATIONSHIP. Even a friendship has this. I can't give you the answers, because I'm not dating you.

Answer 7

red324

That sure is one interesting perspective. That's one of the things i've noticed about her is she's totally herself and doesn't have a fake personality. The best part is she's a total goof ball and literally has no idea how funny she is because she's just being her.

Answer 8

btbc92

Yeah. She's probably similar to my personality type. Look up INFJ or INFP. But she may be ISFP/ISFJ.

Answer 9

Quackthulu

Guru

I’m single, so no. I love myself every god damn day.

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