Should I tell my friends I'm an introvert?

So after questioning friendships, and the whole way I live my social life I have found out that I am an introverted person. I feel so happy just knowing that it is a type of personality and that there are many others out there like me, and that I am completely normal, just not in the majority. However my friends don't understand me and how introverts function. They still push me to go out and party with them, I know they can find me boring at times, and I know they think of me as the "no fun guy." When the reality is that I just find fun in different activities than them. I feel like because they don't understand me that they will begin to alienate me as a friend because I don't want to go out with them, and when I do hang out with them I usually only want to stay for no more than a few hours. I feel like it would be weird just straight up telling them I'm an introvert and that they should deal with it. But I think that might be the only way for them to completely accept my personality.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm an introvert and I've only had to directly explain it to one friend. She kept pressuring me to go out and I very rarely feel like doing so, so I finally reached my annoyance capacity and told her that I'd rather just be alone, haha. She didn't know what an introvert is, so I had to list all of the traits and talk about how much socializing drains me of energy. She still didn't understand, but at least she stopped bugging me about social events. So if you're tired of either being dragged to parties or having to make up excuses not to go, you should explain it to them.

    • Ya I feel like it may come to that, I feel like I constantly have to make excuses that I don't want to go out. How was that conversation? It sounds like it may have been pretty awkward.

    • Haha it was, but I felt very relieved afterward.

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What Girls Said 2

  • You should if you feel that's necessary. I think generally people can already tell, so you don't really have to be like "hey, I'm introverted". I'd suggest other things you guys can do and let them know you're not really a party person. They'll probably still party, but at least they'll understand when you don't want to, and if they're good friends, you guys will still hang out in other ways.

    • That's the problem, if they don't understand how an introvert works, then you can only tell them so many times that you don't want to go out before they start to distance themselves from you.

    • I think you'll have to explain it to them then. Tell them it's draining and not at all fun for you to go out and party with them, and that as an introvert really populated and social situations aren't your thing.

  • I don't know if you can be both, but 3/4 I'm an introvert also lol Because I still love meeting new people, being out and about and partying hard. But sometimes I'm also really pensive and withdrawn from the group and conversation. I think it depends on my mood or whatever. So I understand you..

    But yeah I think it's good to tell your friends that, it's just the way you are. And they should understand that if they're your true friends. :)

    • I know what you mean. I sorta just learned about this whole introvert/extrovert thing. I have a lot of extrovert traits, but I think the core thing is that introverts expend energy when around a group of people, and extroverts gain energy when around people. But it's hard for people to comprehend that sometimes.

    • Exactly. I feel it's kind of a taboo you know? In society if you are introverted, you are seen as "weird" or anti social.. But that is not the case at all. However now I feel like more people are opening up to it, so it's accepted

What Guys Said 2

  • If you told them, then how would you be an introvert? (just joking).

    What do you enjoy doing? You obviously enjoy friends, but not in their setting. You prefer company? You are just not happy with the activities. Perhaps ask them to do something you like...

    I don't enjoy going out drinking often or to parties. To me, they are a waste of time, unless I WANT to go. But, to those that like parties, rock on!

    But, if we're going to do something in additions to socializing, like going to play billiards, bowling, look at cars, hiking, I'm all for it!

    • Definitely I love going to do stuff. But sitting around talking I almost can't stand. I like lots of stuff, all the things you mentioned. Plus I'm in a band with most of my friends, so it's not like I don't do anything at all.

    • So, you're a do-er and not a talker. That's fine. We're all unique and you are a man of little words, but great actions. Good for you, sir!

  • I understand this I think you need to straight up tell them it is hard hopefully they don't understand parties and stuff can be intimidating.

    • ha I don't think you really understand what an introvert is. It's not that I am intimidated or shy about going to parties, I just don't enjoy being at them.

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    • Many (perhaps most) introverts aren't shy or intimidated by socialization, it's just exhausting and they prefer more low-key activities.

    • Exactly, I'm actually not shy at all. I have no problem speaking in public ( which most people do) I'm in a band and I love being up on stage. But as far as going out partying after the show, I'd rather not.