What to say in a first opening message on a dating site?

I'm giving online dating a second try after 4 years of avoidance. I had a bad experience and I wanted nothing to do with it. But now I want to give it a second chance

I got a profile pretty much done and it's ready to be looked at.

When you find a profile of some girl you might be interested in, what's a good message to send that gives off no creepy or pathetic vibe?


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What Guys Said 2

  • Keep your cool and ask her questions. You want to get to know her more. Not kiss her butt and say how beautiful she is.

    Also, have standards listed in your profile. You're a confident guy, and you bring value to the table. Put some good pics up - one where you're wearing a suit and tie. One where you're dressed up nicely and having a good time with a friend or mutual co-worker. A nice environmental pic, such as sailboating, fishing, or the sunset in the background. If you have Adobe Photoshop, use it to manipulate a pic and make it artistic.

    Talking to and dating women should be FUN. Don't take anything too seriously.

  • I've experimented with all kinds of profiles and the most successful kind is the one that merely says "I'm a happy fulfilled person and I'd like to meet some new people". Don't make it look like you're selling yourself (of course you are though). You're right, girls value guys who don't seem desperate/pathetic. The way to seem the opposite of that is to seemingly have little emotional investment in the outcome of the profile on the site.

    In general, put up between 3-5 pics (I've tried having like 10-12 up and responses went down, some think it's trying too hard). Make sure you're smiling in most of them. Make sure you're doing different things in most of them. Try and use pics that have other people in them too, especially women. Nothing like using their own retarded jealousy in your favor.

    • i agree with everything except the part about pics with other women. makes the guy look like a player and I don't want that so I move on.

    • Well you could follow what this person says or you could listen to someone who has tried it both ways and is telling you which way generates more responses. One again the ladies of GaG spread misinformation, great.