Should I have kissed her?

So basically I was talking to this girl for months who lives 200 miles away from me. I live in California and she lives in Las Vegas. The way we first talked was through her cousin who is my friend. We texted, talked on the phone and skyped more and more as time passed. Eventually we got to hangout for the July 4th weekend and it was the time of our lives. We both confessed our attraction to each other. Soon after, she flies over here in a short notice to spend time with me for a good 3 days. afterward things started to feel strange as we became somewhat distant with her going out to parties with her cousins and sisters.

We still talked but not as before. We had discussed how we wanted us to happen but cannot due to her inability to handle distance. I understood that. I probably shouldn't have but I told her I wanted to be her best friend and a person who wants to be more than that at the same time, a lover.

Later weeks passed and we had one intense conversation how this can't happen because of distance and to not wait for each other and just to live our lives. Also she said feelings change even though she denied what I said when I said so you don't feel the same or all those things we talked about didn't mean anything to you anymore? Before all of this, I had spontaneously drove up there to see her and celebrate my cousin's 21st. We only spend 15 minutes together. When I walked to the car, we talked for a good 10 minutes about everything and how it can't work out right now and she is talking to people but nothing serious (just for fun). She told me she doesn't want a relationship right now especially with her turning 21 soon. We hugged and said our goodbyes.

A couple of minutes later, she texted me saying sorry we couldn't hang out and that she was waiting for me to kiss her. I saw the signal but didn't want to take it because I wanted something more than a kiss, not a temporary thing. I know she can't be mine now, but I wanted to show her some way that I want to be apart from all of her guy friends that like her. I don't want to be any other guy who would have taken the kiss. But should I have kissed her?


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  • First off, I feel you about the distance thing, its killer... But with what she said that it wouldn't work out, that you had to each live your own lives, why would she be waiting for a kiss? I see that as just a slap to the face because its saying here's what you could have but its NOT going to happen. I still don't understand why for some its acceptable to girls to say something that hurts you but still expect you to comfort them. So although it sucks overall, I do think you did the right thing, but if she says its not gonna work let it go man, its for your better sanity and so you won't get hurt. good luck in the future