Why do you guys think I'm having trouble getting into the dating game again...?

So I've wanted a girlfriend for a long time but I am having a hard time in my search for that special someone. It's not that I can't find girls I like, I normally can... its just that 1. I am shy and too insecure to just start talking to a girl.. 2. I've been hurt a lot by girls in the past and that's brought down my self esteem and how I feel girls view me and 3. I don't really get into situations to meet girls

But yea I guess here's a bit about me and my situation...

I am 21 years old, living at home still, working part time at a dead end job, and I still need to finish my high school. I don't have a lot of friends, only 1 in this city, and at times he can make me feel like crap about myself, which doesn't help because I normally already feel like crap about myself. I don't get out much except for when I do go and hang out with him, and we normally just hang out at his house. Umm like I said before I am an insecure person, usually based on my looks, and how I feel there's nothing really special about me.

These are the most things I can think of that usually hold myself back from getting out there and dating. I use to be in the swing of things back when I started high school and in junior high, but it seems ever since I dropped out of high school a lot went down hill. I found myself as being an outgoing and more attractive person, but not anymore.

The main reason I wanted to ask this on here was to get the views of regular people. Constructive criticism, advice, anything is appreciated. I don't want to die a lonely man... I want to find that special someone, and most of all I want to feel better about myself. I hope I added enough information.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I found that ackwardness between relationships and I would try to jump into others but I realized, that you have to be happy and comfortable with you. being a girl attraction is big but us women like to conect with our men. It sounds like you need to explore you your can read up online of advice on anything think of some of the things taht are holding you back and learn abou them. Once your feeling better on the inside than it will project to the universe and you will be amazed of how things can turn around. Before I found my boyfriend I couldn't understand why I was singe people would always tell me I'm pretty and crap but when it came down to it I was alone and I hated it. But once I got out there and worked on some of my problems I was gettin hit on left righ and center its like people wanted to be around me instead of going to work going home and dweling on things and no one wanted to be around me. Relationships will come just think about you and were YOU wannabe and the rest will come.


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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 2

  • I would also agree in doing things differently in the future - if your "friend" detracts from your self-worth and doesn't respect you for who you are, then in my opinion that's not a friend worth having. Go out and develop your interests, whatever they may be. Try some new hangouts, join a club, engage in more conversation -- basically, make an investment in yourself to grow and change. I did this a few years ago, and admittedly it was difficult at first. I was very shy and reluctant to open myself to other people, especially girls. But when I changed my outlook and method of socializing, my entire world changed.

    Take it from someone who was there a few years ago (I'm almost 25 now): YOU have to accept and love yourself before a woman will. And when you're out there in the world enjoying life and what it has to offer, your next girlfriend may potentially fall right into your lap. Happy hunting, sir.

  • Dude you situation is 90% identical to mine

    I got one advice

    go out meet people with the same interest

    do a dance class

    put some money aside for it

    open ur heart to possibilities

    and a good friend would not put you down if he is a friend

    so my advice get more friends

    open your circle abit more

    there's bound to be one you will find you will trust me

    insecurity last as long as you don't do anything

    but once you say the first hello

    i swear to god those heart pounding would just stop

    it is just the first move that scares the shit hell out of you

    you got to take one more step and a new world opens

    And you are young so you most likely won't die a lonely man!

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