Went on few dates with guy, is it OK for me to ever initiate text?

OK so I always hear that a girl shouldn't ever text a guy first as the guy will find her needy or desperate. but today I texted a guy first (usually wait for him to text me or call me first) just to say hi and to hope he had a good flight and enjoying his time and I would talk to him soon...and I left it at that. was really just a touching base text as he is seeing his child this week who he usually doesn't get to see (different state). is it OK I sent that? I didn't ask him when I'd see him next or anything...just don't get why it would be issue if I sent a text as people keep telling me I shouldn't...any feedback would be great. thanks!


Most Helpful Guy

  • Where do girls get this nonsense about texting first? Seriously, it's a crock and the fact that girls are spreading all this BS about what they THINK guys want (when they're totally wrong) to other girls only makes it harder for guys.

    Girls, whenever you think you know what guys want or how they think, I want you to take that thought, and shove it where the son doesn't shine. It'll do better there than in your head.

    In any case, follow your instincts. Do what you want to do.

    For the record I once broke up with an ex because she never initiated contact.

    • thank you for that info! see I was starting to worry...i very very rarely initiate contact, just wait for him, even though I can tell he likes me...cuz I know he's busy and stuff...but that's y I feel sending a quick text with no urgency about him getting back to me but knowing I'm thinkin of him is a good thing! so glad I listened to my instincts on this one! :) ...and he sent me back a really nice text so your right about guys liking girls to inititate sometimes! :)

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What Guys Said 2

  • Don't worry, all of this "don't text first" is a load of rubbish. If there was a girl I liked and she texted me, I'd love it! Forget it being needy. If a guy likes you, he likes you. If you send him a text saying "Hi how are you? What are you wearing? What are you eating? Where are you? When will I see you next?", that's needy. But just a text saying hello and like you did "hope you had a good flight" will show him you're interested and he'll like it.

    Here's a general rule of thumb. If someone tells you how to act or behave... ignore it. Do what you feel is best (within reason). If you want to send a text saying hi, send a text saying hi. If you ring him out of the blue because you fancy a chat, do it. Trust your gut feelings, not what anyone else tells you to do.

    • thanks so much for your feedback...that was so helpful and exactly what I needed to hear from a guy's point of view! :)

  • I don't subscribe to that rule, I see no reason why you couldn't send the first text.

    • thank you for your feedback! looks like girls got it wrong when it comes to this rule!

    • They got it wrong when it comes to a lot of things about the way guys think. I swear girls make half this sh*t up just to justify being able to make guys do all the work.

    • lol you may be on to something! :)

What Girls Said 1

  • I don't see anything wrong with it. However,I have met a guy who doesn't like 'clingy' girls. But every guy is different.