(Girls only) Does it mean I suck?

I'm NOT talking about guys with egos, jerks, etc.

I'm a nice guy, I'm not immature, I have a lot of qualities girls apparently find attractive, yet I have never had a girlfriend. I'm not afraid to approach women and talk to them. But STILL I never date.

My questions:

1.Do people (girls) think single guys like me are pathetic?

2.Do girls think of long-term single guys like there is something wrong with them?

3. The longer it takes me just to get a girlfriend, does it mean I was/AM sub-par, inferior, not good enough?

And I don't mean people who CHOOSE to be single. I mean the people who can't get a mate.

And I don't want to hear that I haven't met the right person yet.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think its good when guys are single for longer periods of time instead of just fooling around with a ton of different girls. it shows commitment and that you are more serious when you do get into a relationship. It also shows me that they have more on their plate then just finding a girlfriend like consintrating on other aspects of their life; work, school, etc.. I find that a turn on. So...don't worry about it as long as you aren't like always complaining 'oh man...why am I always single." then it makes you look desperate.

    By no means are you subpar or inferior- what extremes! I have seen your pictures your highly attractive, probably just haven't met the right girl yet or aren't dating/flirting/following -up enough. Personally I would go out with you.

    Plus the upside is its hard to tell if a person is single by choice or just can't get a mate unless they outright tell you so you could always play it off if you're ashamed. I always just tell people I don't really have much going on in my love life and they kind of get the hint.



Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 7

  • 1. Most women only date single guys lol. Being single is a plus if you're looking for a relationship :P

    2. I'm in a long term relationship with a guy who was never in an actual relationship. I love him :D

    3. Nope!

    • 3. But why isn't happening for me? It makes me feel a lot less wanted.

    • Show All
    • I think it could just be the way you're approaching relationships all together. But you're really attractive, so it shouldn't be too difficult for you if you just find an approach that works for you!

    • Thanks for the compliment.

  • Some people don't look into it too much. I personally do, because knowing the relationship history of a potential partner kind of lets me know what to expect out of that person. Questions about their ex and see how they talk about them, what their issues were blah blah. Going out with a guy that hasn't had much of a history (been there) I'm kind of going out on a limb with because I can only take their word on the kind of person they really are (most of the time they're advertising themselves) and I don't know who they are until they have me in a relationship and their true colors start showing.

    In your case, I wouldn't be trying to look for someone. When you just so happen to meet a girl you think you like (after talking for a while, not just "hey you're pretty lets date!") and act as real as possible, don't lie about anything just be straight up.

    • That's so unfair. You're saying it's bad for me?

    • To not have a history, for me and some others, yes. You're single not sick there is nothing wrong with being single. And dating someone that doesn't know some things about themselves in a relationship, yeah of course it's going to bother me. I'm not being mean I'm being honest.

  • 1. Not unless they bring it to my attention and whine/complain about it.

    2. I don't think of them any differently.

    3. Not at all, although I would suggest looking for women in different places or trying a new method, figuring out what ISN'T working.

    Then again, when I meet a guy, I don't usually ask the reasons behind their singleness, especially when I'm single too and looking for a relationship with them.

  • Greetings.

    I believe that if you are passionate about something in life (like a career) the rest will follow. It's when people have that internal spark that makes them so attractive. Then who they happen to be with and when is secondary. However, why not get a friend to help you. Find a girl that you trust and simulate a situation as if you were interested in her... keep on doing that and she will be able to give you feedback if there are some strange signals that you may be sending (and ask her to be honest so that it is obvious that you are looking for a criticism and not comfort). Otherwise, there is no reason in the world that you should be having a problem. The only boundaries that exist are mental ones, that we set up ourselves. Best of luck.

  • 1) Personally, I don't think single guys are pathetic. There are many reasons guys are single and I am not one to judge.

    2) You want truth and for a girl to be real so here you go...I don't think there is something wrong with a long term single guy. However, I will step back and wonder if he has commitment issues. I will be able to tell right away if he has commit issues though. If he does then I will be gone.

    3) I don't think you can really put a time line on finding someone with potential for yourself. When it happens, it happens. It doesn't detract from the guy as an individual in my mind. My hope though is that he hasn't fallen into a cycle of dating toxic girls and thus it's holding him back from a meaningful relationship. If that's the case then he needs to wake up.

  • 1. No

    2. NOO


    We all have VERY different lives, we meet people who we date some meet tons, and some meet one

  • 1. Definitely not. Would you rather like to be a guy who is known as a man wh***? You are perfectly fine! Maybe you should try to flirt a little bit more so that they can notice you as potential partner.

    2. No because everyone is different. You aren't weird. It's unrealistic to believe everyone has to be in a relationship all the time. I wouldn't mind it at all :)

    3. Hell no! Sometimes it just takes you longer to get the right mate - you wouldn't want some brainless girlfriend, would you?

    • I feel like while everyone is running around dating each other, that I'm missing out on something..

    • and it's especially tough for me, because I love to give (as well as take 50-50) and it feels like no body wants it

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