Undeniable connection, strong attraction- so why aren't we talking?

I have NEVER met anyone this compatible with me, so PLEASE give me advice as to how to make this work out!

I recently went out with a guy for the second time, we are both 17. We met through a camp- it was undeniable that we were compatible. I knew it, and he knew it. We pretty much became best friends over the course of that 3 day camp.

A few weeks passed after the camp, and we kept in touch vaguely via Facebook. Turns out that after camp, he finally broke free of his girlfriend of a year and a half. He asks me out to coffee a week after the break up, which got extended into a dinner and a walk. It felt kind of like a date! :) He seemed interested that evening, but I was hesitant about his intentions and I'm sure it showed. After a couple weeks, I suggested another outing-- which happened 4 days ago.

I went ski/snowboarding with him for the entire day- we behaved like friends. afterward, we drove down from the mountain and just found a place to stop the car. We had a pretty intense conversation and the topics included everything. Family, friends, hobbies, views on life, views on relationships, difficulties, flaws etc. The conversation must've lasted over 2 hours. In a car.


We while we chatted, he eventually lay down with his head on my lap. My hand rested on his chest, and he gently held it. It was delicate- fingers slightly intertwined, and he occasionally stroked my hand and even held it up to his face once and left it there. YET, our conversation contradicted our body language so much, which left me EXTREMELY confused. We were discussing our FEAR OF COMMITMENT, while we were bonding so cozily. Our fear wasn't a problem about lack of commitment (not cheating/flirting etc), it was the HESITATION. The because for his fear was from being trapped in an unhappy relationship for a year and a half, and as for me- the origins of my fear is unknown to me.

Anyways, it was a beautiful long moment. A couple of times, right after I said something in the middle of our conversation, he would pull me in and give me a peck on the cheek- he even accidentally slipped out "I love you". We groaned and then laughed about how that phrase was always inappropriately used. I knew it couldn't be love... not yet. Earlier in our conversation, we actually discussed how "I love you." is often WRONGLY used. However, this little gesture left me wondering if he usually kissed girls as friends, or if I was actually a little more special!

Fast forward, he drives me home because it was getting late. He walks me to my front door, where I finally showed my affection with a peck on his cheek. I guess I was nervous, so I turned around to open the door right after. Without hesitation, he gives me a kiss on my cheek along with a shoulder squeeze/hug. He ends it with a few "Good night"s and "I had fun."s

Everything was SO AMAZING, but it has 4 days and I haven't heard from him. All we did was continue our poke war over Facebook.What should I do?


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Well, if I were you, I would just find him again and start making out with him. Don't know what you're sitting here typing up this big long post for ;)


What Girls Said 1

  • Hello. Firstly, sounds like his break ups been pretty recent. He may need to recover from it. Its normal. Therefore, things might have to be taken slowly, not too seriously, as you discussed there's that fear and hesitation.

    After my break up, I noticed that I got close to a guy friend, kinda to relive what I had with my ex, because I missed it. And I got how the whole rebound thing had some sense. Anyways, I was sorry for it.

    Seems like he's getting a little too cuddly, especially dropping the I love you. But, you discussed how its use was innapropriate, etc.

    He could really click you. It may not be because he misses that intimacy or whatever. You may be something special to him.

    I mean it sounds like you guys have been having a good time. So, I'd say to continue spending time together. But also don't get your hopes up.

    After a break up, well I know, I kind of wanted to rebuild myself or get used to putting focus soley on me. His situation could be entirely different. I don't know. I just wanted to give you a different perspective.

    Spend some time with him. Talk. Be happy. Hope all goes well!